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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27331654">Kylo Ren and the Reader</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/AllyMichele/pseuds/AllyMichele'>AllyMichele</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>All of the aus, Angst, Daddy Dom Kylo Ren, F/M, Feelings, Fluff, Force Bond (Star Wars), Hades AU kylo, Prince Kylo, Smuggler Kylo, Smut, Soft Kylo Ren, basically every trope in one book, but we do it for Kylo, there will be laughter, there will be tears, will tag more as more chapters are added</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 23:15:03</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>47,742</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27331654</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/AllyMichele/pseuds/AllyMichele</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Hello everyone! This story will consist of you, the reader, and Kylo Ren (or Ben Solo) in various circumstances, planets, tropes, whatever you or I could think of! Each chapter will be it's own story and I will be updating every day! Fair warning that some chapters will have sexual content in them but you can always skip over it if you would like!</p><p>If you have any requests or prompts that you would like me to cover, feel free to comment them below! I hope you enjoy!</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Ben Solo/Reader, Ben Solo/You, Kylo Ren/Reader, Kylo Ren/You</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>47</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Falling In Love</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hey guys! Don't worry, A General's Daughter is not hiatus or anything! I just wanted to expand since I have some more free time and try to write different stuff that isn't story centric! I hope you guys enjoy! As always leave a kudos or a comment if you'd like to see more, I am taking requests as well! Enjoy!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>You couldn’t recall exactly when you started to fall in love with Kylo Ren. </p><p>Whenever you would hear people describe falling in love, that’s exactly what it seemed like. <i>Falling.</i> A leap into infinity that hopefully led to the one person that was meant for you. It was quick, it was scary, it made your entire body feel alive. Poets and authors dedicate their entire lives to describe the rush that falling in love gives people.</p><p>But for you...for you it wasn’t that at all. If you could compare it to anything it would be the waves gently washing over the sand or watching flowers bloom. It was just an average, mundane thing that you would never give any thought to but when you did...you’d realize just how beautiful those things were and how you wouldn’t trade them for anything. </p><p>The first realization was when you made him laugh when you first met. You worked on the Finalizer, nothing fancy like a general or admiral, but you still kept the ship going and that made you feel helpful. It gave you a purpose in life that scavenging or swindling never could, it made you feel important.</p><p>It especially made you feel important when General Hux had given you something to rush over to the command center. Well, more like shoved and barked at you. Nevertheless you nodded and made your way across the ship, not wanting to be at the end of his blaster due to a slip up.</p><p>Once you had walked in you immediately wished someone else had taken the assignment. People were scattered about in terror, watching as a massive black figure wreaked havoc on the control panels and had some poor officer in the air.</p><p>You knew immediately who it was. Kylo Ren. He was commander of the First Order but also one of the most terrifying men in the galaxy. A single mistake could send this man into a blinding fit of rage that no one could control. This was the first time you were seeing it in person. </p><p>The heat from his lightsaber was making the room incredibly hot, the angry red casting a menacing glow that struck fear deep into you...but also a morbid curiosity. You had only heard stories of them, never having the luck to see one up close, and the power they held. There was no way of knowing how many people had died from that blade that Kylo held.</p><p>As you were lost in thought you had completely ignored the people around you, not taking notice that they had all left the room while you stood there transfixed. It was only when the sound of a body hitting the metal floor that it snapped you out of your thoughts.</p><p>Luckily the officer was still breathing, though extremely pale, and was scooting away at a fast pace. Kylo had his back turned and his shoulders were heaving as if he had just run around the sand dunes in Tatooine. </p><p>
  <i>Kriff, I need to pay more attention. Maybe if I just lay these gently on the floor he’ll see them and I can sneak aw-</i>
</p><p>“Stop.” A robotic voice ordered, their breath ragged. It didn’t take a genius to realize that he was talking to you.</p><p>You stopped mid step, the papers halfway from the floor while your back was bent. You took a deep breath and focused on keeping inhumanely still, eyes screwed shut.</p><p>
  <i>Well it was a nice life. Not really, I probably could have done more. Like go on a vacation or hijack a TIE or something….at least I would be known for something cool and not “wrong place, wrong time.”</i>
</p><p>“Your thoughts are incredibly loud. I suggest you stop them.”</p><p>After he said that you only grew more anxious. You knew he was highly skilled in the force but you didn’t know ANYTHING about it besides that people who had it could throw stuff. Unfortunately you couldn’t control your thoughts and they only grew louder.</p><p>“I’m sorry, I don’t know how…” You croaked, lips dry and eyes still closed. <i>God what the hell is going on?</i></p><p>“You don’t know how to stop thinking?” He asked you. The sound of footsteps coming towards made you flinch and cower away, pressing your back up to the wall. <i>Well at least I know my instinct is flight not fight….</i></p><p>A quick shake of your head gave him the answer he was waiting on though you didn’t understand why. Two seconds ago this dude had destroyed a whole quarter of the ship and now he was wondering why you couldn’t shut up? </p><p>“Look at me.” Kylo insisted, his saber hilted and body preventing any means of escape. You hesitated for a moment before slowly opening them, not realizing just how close he was.</p><p>“Woah, um.” You said, pressing even harder into the wall. “Look, I’m sorry for coming in during...whatever that was. I just needed to give these to you.” </p><p>However Kylo couldn’t care less about your explanation, his head tilted to the side as he took you in slowly. You looked from side to side, not really knowing how to react. It reminded you of a lion taking in it’s prey.</p><p>“What’s your name?” He hummed, his hands flexing in his gloves which made you flinch once more. This man set your every nerve on fire and not in a good way. It was more of a “I’m going to die of a heart attack” kind of way.</p><p>“Do I scare you?”</p><p>
  <i>No, not at all. I just usually look like I’m worried I’m about to be gutted and served for dinner by everyone I meet.</i>
</p><p>A soft chuckle came from somewhere behind his mask that surprised you. You didn’t know what he was laughing at until you realized he had probably read your mind again. A part of you felt violated that he could just invade it but the other part felt….flattered(?) that he liked your inner monologue. </p><p>“Um, I’m sorry. I really don’t know what’s going on…” You cautioned, not wanting to upset him again. He straightened himself back to his full height and returned to business once again. It was going to give you whiplash.</p><p>“Your name.” </p><p>“Y/N.” You verified, letting out a small breath when he took a step away from you. </p><p>“Y/N.” Kylo repeated back though it sounded forced, like he wasn’t used to saying anyone’s names. He probably didn’t use anyone’s names besides Hux and it made your heart do a little flip that he said yours. </p><p>He started walking away before he backtracked, coming back to look at you. You didn’t know what to do but before you could embarrass yourself even further, the papers that were in your hand were snatched from you.</p><p>“Thanks.” He grunted before walking away once more, cape blowing behind him dramatically. You peeked at him as he left and only when he was out of sight did you slide down to the ground, hand covering your heart. </p><p>Your mind was trying to piece together what had happened but was having a hard time. Hux gave you papers, you delivered them, almost got killed by Commander Ren but then you made him laugh, and now you were laying on the floor. <i>This is not how I wanted this day to go.</i></p><p>Maker knows how long you sat there until you heard approaching voices which made you scramble to your feet and head back to your station. Hux was probably waiting on you to report back and here you were slacking. What would your excuse even be?</p><p>
  <i>“Sorry General Hux, I’m late because Kylo Ren and I got into an intense staring contest?”</i>
</p><p>
  <i>Let’s just hope I never have to see him again…</i>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>The second realization was when Kylo had saved your ass, literally. You had been helping some technicians do some upgrades on the TIE fighters, priding yourself on how flexible your talents were. It had been a long day and while everyone was good company and team players, you were in desperate need of sleep. </p><p>Apparently your body decided that you needed it now rather than when you got in bed and you fell asleep standing up, frame swaying slightly until you felt yourself falling. Your eyes immediately snapped open and you reached out your arms to grab onto something, anything, but knew it was useless. </p><p>You closed your eyes and braced for the fall but it never came. In fact it felt like you were vibrating. You opened your eyes and immediately flushed when you were met with the mask of Kylo Ren who, even with the mask on, looked sick of your shit.</p><p>Then your brain registered that <i>he</i> had saved you. He was using his force powers to keep you upright so you didn’t fall and bust your ass in front of your peers. <i> <b>Then</b></i> your brain registered that everyone was staring at the two of you.</p><p>Instinctively you flailed around, body trying to stand by itself, before Kylo let you go when he was sure you could stand on your own. You brushed off your dirty clothes and offered him a small, thankful smile.</p><p>“Thank you. I didn’t realize how tired I was.” You explained, hands coming together to wring together. He still made you on edge.</p><p>“You should rest more.” Kylo replied simply as if it was obvious. You resisted the urge to roll your eyes, not surprised that he didn’t understand how hard your job was and how readily available you needed to be.</p><p>“Are you calling me stupid, Y/N?” He said though his voice had a teasing edge to it. Your eyes immediately widened and your hand came up to smack yourself on the forehead. <i>I can’t believe I forgot.  </i></p><p>“N-No Commander! I just, I was thinking-” You began blabbering, voice raising an octave in fear before he held his hand up to silence you. His body language wasn’t screaming anger or hurt which comforted her slightly. </p><p>“Calm down, it was a joke.”</p><p>“A joke?” You said, tone laced with doubt. Kylo Ren was the last person to joke around with anything, let alone someone like you. </p><p>“Come with me.” He urged her, not waiting for a reply as he turned to walk the other way. You blinked three times before scurrying after him, heart pounding in your chest. Kylo seemed to be in a good mood so maybe he wasn’t marching you off to kill you.</p><p>It was hard to keep up with him. His legs were impossibly long and his strides were double what yours were. You were quickly running out of what little steam you had left and you had to call out to him, arm reaching out to tug on his arm without thinking.</p><p>Kylo immediately stilled at the touch and looked down at your hand. It took your brain a second to connect the two dots before you pulled it back swiftly as if you were burned, rubbing it on your pants leg. He still didn’t move.</p><p>“I’m sorry. I just was gonna ask you to slow down.” Your tone was airy and your cheeks a bright pink, chest rising and falling quickly. </p><p>There was no exchange of words for a minute before he nodded, hand gesturing for you to walk in front of him. You looked him up and down before following his lead, walking by his side this time. Kylo did not look at you for the rest of the walk but you couldn’t tear your eyes away, not until you realized you were in the cafeteria.</p><p>“The cafeteria?” You puzzled, eyebrows scrunched up in confusion. </p><p>“You need to eat and then rest. You passed out and would’ve seriously hurt yourself if I had not been there.” He lectured, not missing how you shook your head.</p><p>“I appreciate it but I have to get back to work. I don’t have that much longer left of my shift and-”</p><p>“You’re going to eat and then rest.” Kylo interrupted, his voice dropping slightly to let you know that he was serious. But it still didn’t sit right with you. If Hux found out…</p><p>“I’m above Hux and he obviously is not taking care of his workers so I am filling in.”</p><p>You turned and looked at him this time, staring through the visor. What came out of your mouth next shocked you.</p><p>“Oh so you do this for everyone?”</p><p>Once it left your mouth you couldn’t take it back...and how desperately you wanted to take it back. You have no clue why that left your mouth but now it was just hanging there, staring at you with a smirk as if it were laughing at your pain.</p><p>Kylo sucked in a small breath at your statement, shuffling from side to side as if he were suddenly uncomfortable. It made you want to smack yourself. Here was your commander worried about your health and you were over here...<i>flirting? I don’t even know what that would be counted as.</i></p><p>After a tense silence he continued walking into the room, finding a table and motioning for you to sit down while he grabbed food. You were about to insist that you could get it yourself but you didn’t want to say something even more stupid so you just sat there, head in between your arms and wishing the galaxy would just swallow you whole.</p><p>
  <i>I cannot believe I just said that to him. I mean, what did I even mean by that? But also...how the hell did he get there so fast? Was he watching me?</i>
</p><p> </p><p>This time you actually did smack yourself, expelling the thought immediately. There was no way in hell the most important man in the galaxy was wondering what you were doing and it was vain of you to even think that way.</p><p>While you sat at the table screaming at yourself you missed Kylo coming back, jumping when he set the tray down. It contained a sandwich, bread, a drink, fruit, and some kind of weird vegetable. Not something you would usually grab for yourself but hey, food is food.</p><p>“Here.” He pushed the plate towards you, staring at you intensely until you got the hint and took a bite of the sandwich and a swig of the bottle. They were both tasty and your stomach let out a loud gurgle of excitement. You felt your ears turn bright red in embarrassment. </p><p>Kylo stood there awkwardly for a couple of minutes, just watching you eat, until you finally cleared your throat. “Thank you for this, I appreciate it. I promise to take better care of myself so you don’t have to come rescue me.” </p><p>He crossed his arms over his massive chest and looked down at you. You cursed that you couldn’t see his face. “I don’t mind.” Was his reply which confused you.</p><p>“Mind what?” You asked, covering your mouth with your hand since you had a mouth full of food. It certainly wasn’t lady like but your curiosity got the better of you in that battle.</p><p>“Rescuing you.” Kylo mumbled.</p><p>You stopped mid bite and stared at him, eyes blank as you replayed what he had just said in your mind. He took a breath and looked like he was going to say more before he just...walked out of the room. You waited and stared at where he had gone but he never came back.</p><p>“What in the hell?” You grumbled, slamming the half eaten sandwich on your plate. This guy was so hot and cold that you didn’t even know if he knew what was going on most of the time. What did he mean by rescuing you? Why was he being so nice? What did all of this mean?</p><p>Trying to figure out what he was thinking was only giving you a headache, your fingers rubbing along your temples as you tried to take in deep breaths.</p><p>
  <i>Maybe this is all just a dream or something. Maybe I actually fell and hit my head and I’m dreaming. I should just go to my room and lay down and then I’ll wake up and realize it was just my mind being stupid.</i>
</p><p>You nodded to yourself at your plan and quickly scarfed down the rest of your food and drink, practically sprinting to your room that you shared with a girl you never even saw. </p><p>As you swiped your card to enter you could have sworn you felt eyes watching you. You turned around quickly but saw no one and shrugged it off, crawling into bed and dreaming for the first time of Kylo Ren.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>The third realization was when Kylo kissed you for the first time. After he had saved you from a concussion and a sore ass two weeks ago, he had been everywhere you were. If you were in the hangar, so was he. If you were in the cafeteria, there he was. Hell you could be in General Hux’s office and he would find a way to be close to you.</p><p>It was sending alarm bells throughout your head but you couldn’t understand <i>why.</i> Yes he was dangerous and a killer but he was also sweet and...awkward? It was an endearing trait that was slowly starting to win you over. He made himself out to be this big, macho man but deep down he wasn’t completely sure of who he was. </p><p>So that’s why it should not have taken you so long to figure out that Matt the radar technician was Kylo Ren. It was actually embarrassing how long it took you. </p><p>You were sitting in the cafeteria with two of your friends when a blonde, curly haired man with weird glasses came barging through the doors. Nobody really paid him any attention until he spoke.</p><p>“Hi. I’m Matt. I’m a radar technician.” He said slowly and loudly, drawing everyone’s eyes. A few people snickered, a few people said hello back, and then the unfortunate few made eye contact with him.</p><p>Guess which one you were?</p><p>That was how you found yourself scooting over to allow Matt to sit beside you, his tall body taking up most of the space at the table. You kept your head down and continued eating your salad while they chattered back and forth until you felt eyes burning a hole in your cheek.</p><p>You glanced to the side and found Matt staring intensely at you, his eyes flickering over your face as if he was trying to memorize something. It made you shift in your seat until your friend kicked your leg under the table.</p><p>“Matt asked what we thought about Kylo.” They told you, a smirk on their lips. You rolled your eyes.</p><p>“He’s okay.” You said simply, not wanting to elaborate anymore. Of course, you never got what you wanted. </p><p>“He saved Y/N the other day and took her on a date.” Your friend gossiped, falling into a fit of giggles as you angrily stabbed your salad. Matt looked taken aback and you felt the growing need to explain yourself even though you had done nothing wrong.</p><p>“No, no. That’s not right, they’re lying. He saved me from falling and then just walked me to the cafeteria to make sure I was okay.” You explained hastily, the words running together as you tried to defend yourself.</p><p>“Yeah but who has ever known Kylo to do something like that? Especially for someone like us….” Your friend pointed out, pointing their finger at you. “I think he’s got the hots for you.”</p><p>You rolled your eyes and shook your head. “Yeah, and Hoth is the hottest planet in this galaxy.”</p><p>Matt was watching the pair of you as you bickered back and forth before he cleared his throat, making you realize he was still there. “It sounds like Kylo really likes you.” He noted while you let out a loud groan.</p><p>“I really don’t think so. But let’s talk about something else. Matt, where is your next assignment?” You asked, changing the subject before you could start debating with a stranger if the commander of the First Order had a crush on you.</p><p>“I-Um…” He fumbled, blinking rapidly as if he totally forgot everything. You looked at him with a bit of concern, not missing the way his eyes kept darting down to your lips. <i>Weird.</i></p><p>“You are probably where I am at today. I’ll show you who to report to.” You smiled, lightly touching his arm. Matt bit down on his lip as you did this and you wondered if this man was touch starved.</p><p>
  <i>He certainly was not bad looking though his hair is….weird. A little dorky, which is cute. I wonder where he’s from? He must be super new if he’s this nervous…</i>
</p><p>He swallowed hard before offering you a smile of his own. “I’d like that.”</p><p>“Great! Let’s go!” You grinned, slapping a hand on his back before gesturing him to follow you as you threw your lunch away. Something in the back of your mind was sending off alarm bells but you pushed them away, wanting to get to know Matt better. </p><p> </p><p>After a week of working you were excited for the weekend. It had been full of a lot of work and with Kylo nowhere in sight, it was actually quite lonely. You missed seeing him around but Matt had quickly replaced Kylo in the stalking bit. He practically shadowed her the whole week. </p><p>It was endearing the way he asked you questions and tried to get to know you, laughing at your jokes and even hugging you when you opened up to him about something in your past. You didn’t know why but you felt like you could trust Matt.</p><p>That was one of the reasons why you invited him out for drinks Friday night. You had heard about an <i>alleged</i> incident involving him and Kylo’s lightsaber and that in and of itself warranted a drink. </p><p>So here you were, sitting at the bar with your little black dress and favorite drink while you complained about Hux to your roommate.</p><p>“He constantly looks like he’s farted or something. I feel so bad for whoever marries him.”</p><p>“Don’t even get me started on-”</p><p>A loud throat clear behind you made you jump and turn, your lip pulling between your teeth as you gave Matt a onceover. He was dressed in his usual glasses but he was wearing a dark shirt with jeans, a jacket slung over his shoulders. He looked <i>fucking hot.</i></p><p>“Woah, woah! I didn’t know you cleaned up so nice, Matt!” You complimented, sliding off your chair to give him a hug. Normally you weren’t so open but your roommate had taken at least three shots with you and it was warming you up on the inside.</p><p>Matt’s eyes were equally trailing along you, his pupils dilating slightly as he took in all of your exposed skin. You never wore anything near as revealing as what you had on tonight and he was drinking you up. </p><p>“I could say the same about you.” He murmured into your hair, his hand skimming up your arm and leaving a trail of goosebumps. You let out a giggle and grabbed his hand, intertwining your fingers as you dragged him to the dance floor.</p><p>You quickly learned that Matt was not a dancer but he was thoroughly enjoying watching you dance, or at least attempt to. He had a smirk on his face when you were grinding against him but then a goofy smile when you were jumping up and down and screaming the lyrics.</p><p>It was such a fun night and he was actually keeping up with you in what you drank. If you took a shot, so did he. If you got a cosmo, so did he. It was like a mirror but it wasn’t weird at all...or at least that’s what your drunk mind was telling you. </p><p>After a couple more hours of hanging around at the bar and dancing, you realized your roommate had disappeared. It wasn’t anything that would cause you alarm but you still didn’t want to walk by yourself to your room.</p><p>And you knew just who to ask to walk you back.</p><p>“Hey Matt!” You yelled into his ear, stomach fluttering at the way he had to bend down to hear you properly. “I’m ready to go! Can you walk me back to my room?”</p><p>Matt just nodded and looked over the crowd, spotting the exit with ease. He put his hand on the small of your back and guided you to the door but right in the middle of the dance floor your heel twisted and your ankle wobbled. You let out a startled yelp but then found yourself in the arms of a man. Matt.</p><p>It sent a rush of emotions through you as you stared at him. You felt like you had lived this before, like some kind of dejavu. His arms were surprisingly strong and his scent smelled like leather and something else, like a fire or something. It made you want to bury your head into his chest. </p><p>“Are you alright?” Matt asked you and you just nodded, eyelashes fluttering as you wrapped your arms around his neck. </p><p>“Carry me?” You whispered, hoping that he wouldn’t just drop you on your ass.</p><p>Matt seemed conflicted for a brief minute before he agreed, carrying you bridal style out of the bar and into the hallway. You passed by different people that were varying degrees of drunk but your eyes were locked onto Matt’s face.</p><p>“I like your freckles, Matt.” You smiled, finger poking at his cheek. He gave you a puzzled look but then offered a small thank you. You didn’t miss how his cheeks dusted pink.</p><p>“Matt, Matt, Matt…” You started singing, not really holding any type of key or melody. A throaty laugh escaped his chest and it made one of your own bubble up, grin stupidly wide.</p><p>“I think this is it.” He muttered before gently setting you down though he kept his hands on your shoulder to keep you balanced. You looked between the door and him for a second.</p><p>“I didn’t tell you where my room was...did I?” You wondered aloud, digging through your purse for the key. Matt’s face immediately got red but you didn’t notice, going onto the next thing.</p><p>“Do you wanna come inside?” </p><p>He opened and closed his mouth a few times, not really knowing how to answer. Your drunken mind couldn’t really understand his hesitation and wondered if you just hadn’t been forward enough.</p><p>“I would but-”</p><p>Matt was silenced by your lips pressing against his. It wasn’t a clumsy kiss or a rough kiss. It was the perfect amount of pressure that he very eagerly returned. You smiled into the kiss and wrapped your arms around his neck, fingers tickling his neck as you went to deepen it.</p><p>“No, stop.” He growled, pulling away quickly. Hurt etched onto your face before you could stop it, rejection settling heavy in your gut. It made you want to cry.</p><p>“I’m sorry. I just thought…” You stammered, eyes stinging with unshed tears as your cheeks burned. You really thought he was into you and now you just looked like some easy whore. You just ruined whatever chances there were between the two of you.</p><p>“You are not some cheap whore, Y/N.” Matt sighed, his breathing ragged as he stared at your lips. It looked like he was fighting himself on kissing you again.</p><p>You stared at him for a second, wondering if you had spoken aloud, before realizing that you hadn’t. You hadn’t said anything to him about how you were feeling and there was no way he could have guessed that.</p><p>“How do you know what I was thinking?” </p><p>Matt took a step back so that he could put distance between you and then reached out to grab something on his neck. Your eyes widened when you realized that it was his hair and that it was actually...a wig?</p><p>His glasses came next and then the hair cap until you were looking at a man with long, black hair and penetrating eyes that made her feel naked. But she still had never seen this man in her life and she was too drunk to make sense of whatever the fuck was going on.</p><p>
  <i>So Matt is Matt but he was wearing a wig and fake glasses? But why? Is he like a witness protection program member? Am I supposed to know who he is? God all of this is going to make me sick…</i>
</p><p>But the next words that came out of her mouth were what sent her over the edge, what made her head spin and heart hurt. </p><p>“It’s me. It’s Kylo.”</p><p>After he said those four words everything clicked into place. Why he followed you around, why Kylo hadn’t been around, how he knew where your room was. He had gone undercover but for what? Why would he hurt you like this? It didn’t make any sense.</p><p>You opened your mouth to do...something but all that came out was vomit. And it came out all over your shoes.</p><p>“Oh fuck, Y/N.” Kylo groaned as he swiftly side stepped and came behind you, holding your hair up as you emptied your stomach onto the pristine, white floors. </p><p>“Go away.” You moaned before another wave came up, your arms weakly trying to push him off which didn’t even budge him. A part of you knew that you should be mad at him for lying to you. It wasn’t normal nor healthy. But the bigger part of you was more upset that he had just toyed with you, like it was a game or something.</p><p>You genuinely liked Matt and had opened up to him but everything that you had said and done, it was just for Kylo. He had tricked you for whatever reason and that <i>hurt.</i></p><p>After you were finished and could stand up on your own, you glared at him. Kylo at least had the decency to look guilty, head down. He knew he had fucked up and you were glad he was also hurt.</p><p>“You deceived me.” You sniffled, wiping at your eyes with the back of your hand. “You stalked me and made me trust you and for what? What was your goal?”</p><p>He didn’t answer for the longest time, his eyes glued to the floor in thought. The longer he took to answer, the shorter your patience was becoming and just as you went to open your door he finally confessed.</p><p>“I wanted to get close to you without you thinking it was me, so you weren’t so scared.” Kylo began, looking up at you. “I am sorry for hurting your feelings but everything I said and felt to you was real.”</p><p>That statement took you by surprise but it was starting to get repetitive. You were tired, throat burning, and patience out. You straightened your shoulders and jabbed your finger into his chest, trying your best to look intimidating.</p><p>“Well maybe you should try just being yourself next time. Girls don’t like being lied to.” And with that you walked in your room and slammed the door, falling onto your bed and passing out.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>The fourth realization was when he came to you as he truly was. It had been a week and everyone had found out that Matt was Kylo. It was an ongoing joke now but you were still very upset, withdrawing from your friends to keep in your room.</p><p>You had really liked Matt. He understood you, he laughed with you, he made you feel safe and warm. Matt was amazing. But Matt is Kylo. So did that mean you felt that way about Kylo? It would be stupid of you not to realize that you harbor some feeling for your Commander and the fact that you keep replaying the kiss in your mind before bed, about how he had griped you and held you, it was something.</p><p>But Kylo had fucked up. You didn’t even know if you were allowed to say that because who were you? You were just a girl who ran into him during a tantrum that had become the object of his obsession. He was kriffing Kylo Ren, ruler of the galaxies. </p><p>So here you were, sitting in your room with a blanket wrapped around you, watching a sad movie and stuffing your face with your favorite snack. It wasn’t even a real breakup but you were just so exhausted, so mentally and emotionally exhausted from Kylo and his antics.</p><p>And it sucked because a part of you wanted to excuse his behaviour. There was no telling what that man had been through and maybe he didn’t know how to love but he at least knew right from wrong...right?</p><p>All of the thinking made your head hurt and you were all out of ibuprofen. You let out a loud, unnecessary groan before swinging your feet over your bed and heading towards the bathroom.</p><p>Just as your feet touched the floor though, there was a loud knock at your door. You let out a scream and tried to stop your heart from leaping out of your chest, heading over to the door and opening it.</p><p>“I swear if you’ve lost your key again.” You begin to lecture your roommate before the smell hits you. His smell.</p><p>“Hi.” Kylo looked down at you, without his mask. You could tell he hadn’t been sleeping well, eyes and cheeks puffy. You wanted to rejoice in that fact but it hurt you more than you cared to admit.</p><p>“Hello, Kylo.” You said curtly, looking out past him into the empty hallway. “Can I help you?”</p><p>He nodded before looking inside, jerking his head in that direction. “Can I come in?”</p><p>You wondered if it would be a bad idea before shrugging your shoulders, moving aside. You were at least seventy five percent positive he wasn’t going to harm you. “Come on.”</p><p>Kylo ducked under the door and looked around. He looked so out of place in this tiny room, so weird. You watched him for a minute before letting out a laugh which caught his attention.</p><p>“What?”</p><p>“You just look funny.” You replied, leaning on the doorframe. “Why are you here?”</p><p>“I’m here…” He started slowly, as if it was taking a lot of strength for him to say. “I am here…”</p><p>You just lifted an eyebrow up, making a circular motion with your hand to hurry him up. “You’re here…?”</p><p>Kylo smacked his lips for a second before he turned to fully face you, staring directly into your eyes. You gulped involuntarily and felt the same naked feeling as before.</p><p>“I’m here to apologize. What I did was stupid and childish and I am very sorry.” </p><p>You let out a small smile, nodding your head. “Well as long as you recognize that you were-”</p><p>“But I don’t regret it.” </p><p>That made you falter, smile dropping. <i>What does he mean? How can he be sorry if he doesn’t regret it? </i></p><p>You stared at him completely dumbfounded. How can you apologize for something but then say that? It just sounds like an excuse at that point. You pressed the palm of your hand to your forehead to alleviate some of the pressure forming there.</p><p>“That doesn’t make sense.”</p><p>Kylo seemed frustrated at this point, throwing his hands up in exasperation which kind of pissed you off. Here he was, lying to you about his identity, and he had the gall to be upset? </p><p>“I know! I know! I just don’t know how to do this!” He ranted, now starting to pace back and forth across the tiny bedroom. </p><p>“Well for starters you could maybe not lie to people and trick them?” You suggested sarcastically, walking over to the bed before flopping yourself down. It had been a long day wallowing in your own self pity and you just wanted to be left alone.</p><p>“I-yes, you’re right.” </p><p>Now <i>THAT</i> shocked you. Kylo Ren admitting he was wrong? You sat up quickly and looked at him weird, holding your hand out to him. “Are you okay? Let me check your temperature.”</p><p>He didn’t find it as funny as you did but it still relieved some of the tension in the room. You cracked a small smile and let your hand fall back down as well as your eyes, watching your feet dangle off your bed. </p><p>“I don’t know what I’m doing, Y/N.” He admitted to you softly, taking a step so that he was standing in front of you. “I’ve never...I don’t know what I’m feeling. Ever since I saw you I just couldn’t <i>stop</i> thinking about you.”</p><p>You blushed deeply at revelation while trying to force your stomach to stop fluttering like a teenager. It’s not like you two were dating or anything, you hadn’t even <i>technically</i> held hands with the man. </p><p>“But you were scared of me and I needed you to not be scared so I went undercover and that was stupid of me...but I don’t regret it. I don’t regret it because I got to know you and it only confirmed what I have been feeling.” </p><p>Kylo took off his gloves and laid them gently on the bed before dragging his bare fingers up your arm. It reminded you of the bar and just like then, it created goosebumps across your skin.</p><p>Your mind and heart seemed to be racing each other, not really knowing what was about to happen. He had just admitted to you that he couldn’t stop thinking about you, that he went undercover to get to know you, and while those things were <i>certainly</i> unconventional….it was his way of showing you that he cared about you.</p><p>You. Y/N. The most powerful man in the galaxy had his head turned by someone like you. </p><p>“What’s that?” You breathed, finally allowing your eyes to connect. Once they did you could not look away, your lips parting by just how much emotion there was swirling inside of him. It literally took your breath away.</p><p>“That I care for you.” Kylo stated softly, his hand now cupping the bottom of your jaw. His touch was not rough like you would expect from someone like him, it was actually quite tender. A contrast as to what he showed people versus what he actually felt. </p><p>You let out a small, airy laugh at the situation which made him knits his eyebrows in confusion. “I’m sorry I just….why me?” </p><p>He brought his other hand up to brush against your cheek, wondering how best to answer your question. You could tell he was struggling and perhaps now wasn’t the best time to press him on all of his decisions. Perhaps it was best to just live in the moment.</p><p>So with that in mind you placed your hands over his own, leaning into his touch. “You don’t have to answer that now.” You mumbled and watched as his body relaxed slightly. “I care for you too, Kylo.”</p><p>A look of utter disbelief crossed his features which made a small pain in your heart blossom out. It was like he couldn’t believe that you felt that same way, that you could care for someone like him. And suddenly he looked younger, much younger, like a boy who was lost in this gigantic world. </p><p>Acting on instinct you wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him into you. It wasn’t a passionate kiss like the movies make it out to be, it wasn’t a declaration of love, but it was something that you both needed in that moment. </p><p>
  <i>A promise.</i>
</p><p>Kylo easily fell into your embrace and you both hit the bed with a loud groan from it, the springs crying out as if you were about to break it. It went ignored though as you just drank in his smell, his touch, the way his heartbeat would speed up and then slow down, even the way his breath made your skin tingle.</p><p>It was falling in love...in your own, special way.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>The fifth and final revelation was now. You and Kylo were lying in his bedroom, the lights long since turned off and the cool air making you snuggle deeper into each other, and you were thinking over everything that had happened that led you to this moment.</p><p>The first meeting, the bar, the confession, it was replaying in your mind as you were trying to sleep. You were sure he was asleep, his curls splayed out across the pillow and breathing even, and it only made your heart ache more.</p><p>You remembered the day he had asked you to move into his bedroom. You had said, “Yeah, okay.” In what you thought was a sarcastic tone but he had ran with it. When you had arrived back to your room that night, it was completely empty. </p><p>“What happened to all my-” You began asking Kylo when you had entered his room only to see all of your stuff sitting there. He was in the middle of the chaos, trying to sort things and place them in different parts of the room. “What are you doing?”</p><p>“You said you wanted to move in with me.” He said without looking at you, placing one of your photos on the dresser. </p><p>“Kylo I was being sarcastic. We haven’t even said…” You began to explain before you quickly closed your mouth. Kylo, while he cared deeply about you, was still new to expressing his emotions and you did not want to push too hard. </p><p>He never missed a thing though and his head quickly whipped around to face you. You cursed the Maker in your head for your slipup and immediately tried to back track. “I’m sorry, I was just trying to explain why this wasn’t exactly smart.”</p><p>“Say it.”</p><p>You drew a sharp breath in, the air burning your lungs. <i>Is he asking me to?</i></p><p>“Yes. Say it.”</p><p>It was like you were having tunnel vision, the room blurring at the edges as everything became focused on him. Kylo. You knew his other name but never, ever used it. After he had told you about his past you had mistakenly said it aloud and it sent him into a rage.</p><p>You knew you were in love with him. You had felt a connection since your first meeting. It only grew from there but you were afraid to ever say it, afraid it would make him run from you.</p><p>But here he was...asking for you to say it. And despite every nerve in your body telling you to not say it, to pretend you had suddenly gone deaf or lost your voice, you knew you couldn’t run from this forever. You didn’t want to.</p><p>“I love you, Kylo.”</p><p> </p><p>That had been a year ago. A year since your confession. A year since his confession. He had immediately told you that he loved you as well, looking surprised. It was adorable and a memory that you held very close to your heart. </p><p>And as you held him in the dark watching him sleep and dream, clinging to you as if you would float away at any moment, you realized why people wrote about love.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Ben Solo: The Smuggler</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I'm so excited for this chapter! Shout out to all of the readers but also the Adam Driver discord for motivating me! I hope you guys enjoy this! </p>
<p>THIS CHAPTER DOES CONTAIN SMUT!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>You had been searching the galaxy for him for what seemed like years. He was notoriously elusive and it didn’t surprise you that it would take a while for you to find him but you didn’t think it would take <i>this</i> long. It seemed like you had been on every planet in the entire galaxy and no one had seen him.</p>
<p>“What was his name again?” The bartender asked again as you downed your third drink that night, nose wrinkling at the taste. </p>
<p>“Ben Solo.” You responded back dryly. Even his name left a bitter taste in your mouth, hating the fact that he had swindled you. You pride yourself on your street smarts but he had undone it all in a matter of one night. </p>
<p>“You lost half of your earnings to one of the most well-known smugglers in the galaxy?” The bartender, Joe according to his nametag, taunted you. “Sounds like you deserved it if you thought that was a great idea.”</p>
<p>You gave him the coldest stare you could, fingers itching to grab at your blaster and shoot the smug smile off of his greasy face. The alcohol was burning through you and it made you itch for a fight, a way to work out your frustrations. </p>
<p>“Watch it.” You scowled, gripping the glass tight. He held his hands up in mock surrender before going to attend to other patrons, knowing he had overstepped his boundary. </p>
<p>The bar was loud and lively with all sorts of species roaming around. Most of them were smugglers and back-handed dealers but there were a few locals as well as some higher officials, though they were keeping their heads down and words quiet.</p>
<p>Giving a quick once over across the room you finally decided to just give up in your search for him. You had more important things to find that would easily earn you back what you had lost. If you were being honest this search for him wasn’t about the money but more of a revenge plot, wanting to see the smugness fall out of his smirk when you showed up out of the blue.</p>
<p>He knew who you were, knew why you were looking for him. He was a cocky douche, just like his father, and had even gone as far as to leave you notes to mock you. Ben Solo was baiting you in this game of cat and mouse and he was obviously much better at it than you.</p>
<p>You were broke from your self-loathing thoughts by your holopad chiming, indicating you had received a message. With a swipe of your finger, you skimmed across it, rolling your eyes. It was from the Hutts. They were notorious crime lords but paid reasonably well. </p>
<p>The sound of other holopads chiming let you know that this was a universal message. Whoever the Hutts were looking for, they wanted them bad enough to alert every bounty hunter in the galaxy, which meant it must have been a pretty big swipe.</p>
<p>As you scrolled past the unnecessary greeting at the top you felt your drink come back up in your throat as you read the name that was in big, red letters.</p>
<p>
  <b>WANTED FOR CRIMES AGAINST THE HUTTS</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>BEN SOLO </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>REWARD: 500,000 CREDITS</b>
</p>
<p>You had to swallow it back down as your heart skipped a beat, rereading it to make sure it wasn’t just your mind playing tricks on you. After the fifth time, you ordered a much stronger drink which Joe immediately set down in front of you.</p>
<p>“You get the message too, huh?” He asked lowly, his four eyes looking around nervously. “I’ve already heard of people teaming up to split the bounty.” </p>
<p>As he said this his eyes were trained on a booth at the end of the bar. You looked over as well and noticed that it was a table full of bounty hunters, ruthless ones. The kind that would kill anyone just for the thrill. You despised them.</p>
<p>“If anyone is getting their hands on Ben Solo it’s me.” You vowed, fishing out some credits and laying them down on the bartop. </p>
<p>Joe just shook his head though, offering you a wry smile. “Keep it and you can repay me when you get him.”</p>
<p>You let out a small chuckled and thanked him, sliding it back in your pocket and standing up. Your gear was heavy on your body but it was a welcome ache, your shoulders rolling to relieve some of the tension. </p>
<p>It didn’t escape you that a quarter of the people had already left, probably on their way to figure out where he would be. You knew better though. Ben Solo knew there was a bounty on his head and he would be openly flaunting it, not hiding off on some desolate planet. </p>
<p>You walked out into the chill of the night and made your way to the hangar, walking to your ship and sending the repair droids away. The sound of your boots clicking against the metal of the floor was loud, sitting down in the cockpit and bringing the hunk of metal to life. </p>
<p>“To Coruscant we go…” You mumbled, thrusting up and taking off into space.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>It had been five days on this stupid planet and not one sign of him. You had gone to all of his favorite places, all of his hiding spots, anything you could think of where he would be...he wasn’t. </p>
<p>You knew he hadn’t been captured yet because the bounty was still posted and while you hated to admit it, you were worried about him. The Hutts had said they wanted him dead or alive, which most bounty hunters wouldn’t have a problem with, but you did.</p>
<p>It was a complicated relationship between you and Ben. You had met him numerous times and he was as charming as he was reckless. He believed that everything would always work out and that frustrated you to no end, especially when it always turned out in his favor.</p>
<p>When he had cheated you out you had actually felt hurt, thinking about all of the times you had helped him only for him to stab you in the back like that. You had saved him from at least three bounty hunters AND a band of angry sandpeople. You wouldn’t call it a friendship but it was certainly an understanding.</p>
<p>Which is why it was very important for you to find him first. He owed you quite a lot and you wanted him to beg for mercy, to plead to you. You didn’t want him to die but if he at least <i>thought</i> he would, it would make you feel better….right?</p>
<p>You were walking with your hood up and mask over your face to keep out the harsh wind of the city, constantly scanning for anything that would alarm you. So you can imagine your surprise when you saw a certain Wookie, towering over everyone else, walk into a...brothel?</p>
<p>
  <i>Oh, this is going to be SO good.</i>
</p>
<p>You practically ran across the streets and stared at the neon sign above the building. <i> <span class="u">Paradise Skies</span></i>. A sneer formed on your lips as you shook your head and ducked inside, the smell of sweat and sex hitting you immediately.</p>
<p>“Well, well, well. A bounty hunter, hmm?” A soft voice came from behind you along with a brush up your back, making you flinch. “A sensitive one as well…”</p>
<p>You huffed and removed your hood and mask, turning to stare at the practically naked woman. It took everything in you not to glance down. “I’m looking for someone.” You stressed, already fishing out your bag. </p>
<p>“Aren’t we all?” The woman mused, lips parting in a seductive manner. “Unfortunately I cannot disclose my patrons' names.”</p>
<p>A quick flash of two hundred credits quickly changed her mind though, pointing to the very back room with a long fingernail. “He’s in there with a client, the man that came in with the Wookie.”</p>
<p>You gave her a simple nod and started to walk until she called out to you, her fingers counting the money. “Please don’t get blood on my sheets, dear.” She asked as if it were a common occurrence. </p>
<p>You nodded once more and then quietly walked to the door. Your hand was on the doorknob but you stalled, pressing your ear to it instead. There wasn’t any sound coming from the room and you got worried that he had somehow seen you come in.</p>
<p>With a deep breath, you threw the door open and barged inside, hand gripping your blaster until a hard object thrust you back into the wall. Your eyes widened as a blaster was aimed directly at your face and at the end of it was Ben Solo.</p>
<p>“Well, well, well…” Ben drawled slowly, head tilted to the side in amusement. “When Chewie said he saw a bounty hunter the last person I was expecting was you, kitten.”</p>
<p>Your eyebrows furrowed at the nickname and took his distraction as a way out, kicking your legs out and knocking him on his ass while his blaster went across the room. With the swiftness of a trained hunter, you whipped your own pistol out, pointing it straight at his chest. “Can’t say the same for you, babe.” You smirked.</p>
<p>Ben held his hands up slowly, watching you like a hawk. “Oh come on now, kid. Do you really wanna do this?” His voice held a slight edge to it, a fearful one, and it made your smirk grow.</p>
<p>“You do realize the bounty on your head right now, Ben? Five hundred thousand credits.” You said slowly, pronouncing each syllable. “What did you do to earn a bounty that high?”</p>
<p>He tried to sit up but you placed your foot on his chest, keeping him on the ground. A tiny part of you was enjoying this power play, butterflies swarming in your stomach. </p>
<p>“I would never do anything, Y/N. You know me.” </p>
<p>That earned a roll of your eyes and a frown, your foot pressing down slightly harder. “Do I? I thought I did until you wiped me clean.” You growled, eyes darkening. Ben looked almost apologetic.</p>
<p>“Look I’m sorry. I was caught up in a deal and I needed the money. I didn’t want to hurt you.” </p>
<p>“I’m sure you are!” You scoffed, ignoring the pleading in his eyes. “Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t put a hole between those pretty little eyes, Solo.” </p>
<p>Ben was looking more and more panicked, eyes looking around the room for something to give him the upper hand but you had chosen the perfect place to keep him in.</p>
<p>You watched him as he realized that there was no way of escaping and swallowed hard, the blaster heavy in your hand. You couldn’t show him that you were faltering.</p>
<p>He gave you one last pleading look before a noise outside of the room startled you both. It sounded like glass breaking and angry shouts. Your eyes connected and dread fell into your stomach. <i>Someone else knows he’s here.</i></p>
<p>Ben took advantage of your distraction and slid out from under you, sliding across the room to grab his weapon. You refocused and turned to face him but he had his hand stretched out for you, jerking his head to a side door.</p>
<p>“Come with me.”</p>
<p>Those three words made you stall, doubt making you take a step back. You didn’t know if you could trust him or not and you knew that those bounty hunters would easily kill you too if you were seen with him.</p>
<p>“Damn it, Y/N, come on!” He snapped, not waiting on your response as he roughly grabbed your hand and pulled you outside. “<i> <b>Follow me and keep your head down</b></i>.” </p>
<p>“If you think I’m taking orders from you then you must be-” You began to bicker before you felt his strong hand gripping your jaw, his amber eyes glaring into your own.</p>
<p>“You don’t have a choice kitten and I’m not going to ask you again. Let’s go.” He breathed into your face before letting you go, turning back around and starting to walk through the alleys. </p>
<p>You followed him in a daze, keeping your head down as he asked but only so he couldn’t see the flush across your cheeks.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>It had been an hour of walking and dodging before he had brought you into one of the sleaziest hotels you had ever seen. You didn’t expect him to stay in five-star rooms but this...this was just dirty.</p>
<p>Ben must have seen your apprehension because he chuckled, his pace now slow that they weren’t being followed anymore. “It’s not that bad.”</p>
<p>You shot him a look and made a face. “Even for your standards, this is low.” You quipped, arriving in a room with paint peeling off the door and a busted window. “Surely you can afford something nicer?”</p>
<p>“Nice gets you killed, kitten.” He answered while shoving his shoulder into the door, the weight of it making it open easily. “Ladies first.”</p>
<p>“I think you’re forgetting that you are <i>my</i> prisoner right now. Just because I haven’t shot you doesn’t mean I’m just going to let you get away again.” You warned as you walked inside, taking in the strewn clothing across the floor and half-eaten food.</p>
<p>“I wouldn’t expect anything less, kitten.” He grinned cheekily before shutting the door, sliding the lock into place.</p>
<p>“Stop calling me that.”</p>
<p>He ignored you though, sliding off his boots and coat. You just stood there awkwardly.</p>
<p>“Make yourself at home.” He said while spreading his arms out as if this filthy hotel room was a mansion. You just continued to frown.</p>
<p>“Ben…” You began but stopped when he held out his hand. </p>
<p>“Listen I know I fucked up, okay? I shouldn’t have done that to you and I’m sorry but you can’t just take me to the Hutts! You’re a better person than that!”</p>
<p>You visibly bristled at his comment, taking a defensive stance. He was talking down to you as if <i>you</i> were the one in the wrong. “Excuse me? Where do you get off on telling me what type of person I am?”</p>
<p>Ben opened his mouth to reply but you quickly shut him down, taking a step towards him threateningly. “<b>You</b> fucked up, not me. If you needed money I would have lent you some because I trusted you!”</p>
<p>“Why? You think we’re friends or something?” He shot back, fists curling by his side. Your heart hurt at that painful jab but you pushed it down.</p>
<p>“You fucking jerk. This is exactly why no one trusts you, why no one wants to get close to you. I wasn’t even going to turn you into the Hutts, I just wanted my money back but you know what, FUCK YOU!” You screamed in anger, stomping your foot like a child before reaching for your holopad. You were going to report him immediately. </p>
<p>Just as you began typing your message the holopad was snatched from your hands. You shot your head up to glare at Ben just as he literally snapped it in two with his bare hands. </p>
<p>“I swear to the Maker I’m going to slit your throat, Ben!” </p>
<p>You raised your hand up to slap him but he easily caught it, his grip tight around your wrist. He could snap it if he really wanted to and for a minute you were afraid he was. </p>
<p>Until he shoved you against the wall and captured your lips in a passionate kiss, stealing your breath away.</p>
<p>Your mind went completely blank as the taste of whiskey, cigarettes, and a hint of mint invaded your mouth. It was a combination that didn’t really go together but was so <i>Ben</i>. It made your knees weak and stomach twist and you found yourself returning the kiss just as desperately.</p>
<p>
  <i>What the fuck am I doing? Two seconds ago I was ready to yeet this asshole into hyperspace but now I’m sucking his face?</i>
</p>
<p>You didn’t want to dwell on it though, consequences be damned. There was so much tension between the two of you and if this was a way to get it out then so be it.</p>
<p>Ben bit down on your lip and tugged which brought you back to the present, your eyes opening to stare into his. His pupils were blown wide in want and you could feel him against your thigh.</p>
<p>“Do you want this, Y/N?” He asked you, voice desperate. He was giving you a way out, a chance to say no and part ways. “I can give you the money and you can go or….or you could stay.” </p>
<p>The uncertainty in his voice made your heart crack slightly. Sure you got on each other’s nerves and fought but deep down, deep down you knew he was sorry. You knew he was your Ben. He wouldn’t be risking his life with this option if he didn’t truly trust you.</p>
<p>But did you trust him? <i>Could</i> you trust him?</p>
<p>His eyes were searching your own for any hesitation, any fear, but you cast them aside and gripped the collar of his shirt to pull him back into you. “Stay.” You asked, your eyes flickering between his amber orbs and his lips. </p>
<p>Ben broke into a sweet smile, one that made your heart melt. It was so rare to see him truly smile and it made you giddy inside to know you were the cause of that.</p>
<p>“Okay.” </p>
<p>This time you both went in for the kiss at the same time, noses brushing against each other while your eyelashes tickled his cheek. It was much slower this time, a chance to truly explore the other person, and it felt much more intimate than anything you had ever experienced before.</p>
<p>You stayed like that, pressed against the wall, for who knows how long but you were both getting slightly more desperate. The kisses were coming in quicker successions, his hands brushing against your hips before going behind to grip your ass.</p>
<p>“Ah..” You moaned at the contact, hips raising up to allow him better access. He seemed to like this, letting out a small grunt, and literally lifting you up to wrap your legs around his waist.</p>
<p>In this position his cock was right over your clothed sex, his hips thrusting shallowly to gain some sort of release. It did nothing but make you wetter, your head thrown back to rest on the wall as you humped each other against the dirty hotel wall.</p>
<p>There was something so primal in it though, so filthy. You both were so lost in each other that you couldn’t even be bothered to take off your clothes, rutting against one another like animals.</p>
<p>Ben took the opportunity of your neck being exposed and bent his head down to bite down on your collarbone, making you cry out. You felt his cock twitch at your sounds and nearly came right there. He was lavishing your neck with tiny kisses and bites, making sure to leave as many marks as he could.</p>
<p>“I’m gonna mark you up so pretty, kitten. <i> <b>Everyone</b></i> will know who you belong to when we’re done.” He hissed into your ear, capturing your earlobe between his teeth.</p>
<p>“Fuck yes.” You gasped, mind hazy as you moved your head to capture his lips once more. Your teeth clashed together and tongues danced around each other until he suddenly dropped you back to your feet.</p>
<p>“Get on the bed. Now.” He ordered while undoing his belt and removing his shirt. You gulped and nodded, scrambling onto it and scooting towards the middle. Your clothes were still on but you were pretty certain they wouldn’t be for long.</p>
<p>He looked like a man starved, staring at you as if you were his first meal in months. His knees hit the bed with a groan and he crooked his finger at you, motioning for you to come to the edge of the bed.</p>
<p>You crawled over to him on all fours, making sure to swing your hips just right. He wiped a hand down his face as he watched you, palming his erection through his pants. </p>
<p>“Take off your shirt.”</p>
<p>“You don’t wanna do that for me?” You teased with a smirk but it quickly fell when he gripped your hair and yanked it, a gasp slipping past your lips.</p>
<p>“Don’t start now, kitten. We both know who’s in charge here.” He warned before letting you go, licking his lips. “Take it off.”</p>
<p>As you reached down to grasp the bottom you gave him a sly wink, unable to help yourself, before pulling it over your head and throwing it across the room. Goosebumps quickly appeared over your skin but you didn’t know if it was from the air or his intense gaze. </p>
<p>“Your pants.” Ben asked but his breathing was shallow. You pouted but quickly shimmied out of them as well, leaving you just in your bra and panties. He was memorizing every part of your body and you wondered in the back of your mind if this is what aphrodite felt like. </p>
<p>“Beautiful.” He whispered before kneeling down on the floor, his cheeks flushed a pretty shade of pink. You blossomed under his praise and gave a shy smile, tucking a stray piece of hair behind your ear.</p>
<p>“You’ll look even more beautiful when I destroy you, Y/N.” </p>
<p>Your thighs clenched at his dark words and tone, not expecting that from him. You didn’t have time to dwell on it though because he had shoved you back onto the bed with your legs dangling off of the bed.</p>
<p>Ben was between your thighs now, staring at your pussy like it held all the answers to life itself. He brought a finger up and lightly trailed it down your panties, noticing the dampness that had collected there.</p>
<p>“Oh, baby…” He drawled before he gripped the top of your underwear. You shot up when you heard the tear, eyebrows knitted together in anger as he had just shredded your favorite pair of panties.</p>
<p>“Hey!” You complained.</p>
<p>“I’ll get you some more.” He replied, rolling his eyes at your tone and lightly slapping your thigh. </p>
<p>You opened your mouth to reprimand him but the only sound that escaped was a moan, his tongue licking a hot strip up your sex. Your back arched and legs tried to shut which he stopped, his eyes staring directly into your own.</p>
<p>“You taste like heaven, kitten.” He groaned before doing a slow circle around your clit which had you seeing stars. You fell back down to the bed and fisted your fingers through his hair as he continued his slow pace, tugging on it whenever he would hit the right spot.</p>
<p>“Fuck, Ben.” You muttered as his tongue went from swiping along your pearl to darting in and out of you at a quick pace. You shouldn’t be surprised that he was a good pussy eater but you didn’t think it would bring you to your peak so fast.</p>
<p>He slid a finger inside you as he picked up his speed against your clit, the bottom half of his face absolutely soaked. You started to grind your hips into his face before he suddenly got an idea, pulling away completely which made you cry out.</p>
<p>“Noooo!” You whined, not letting go of his hair to try and get him to go back down. He smirked and licked around his mouth, eyelashes fluttering shut at the taste. </p>
<p>“I want you to sit on my face.”</p>
<p>That caught your attention, your eyes widening as you gave him a look of utter disbelief. “You’re joking.”</p>
<p>But he shook his head, hopping onto the bed and resting his head on the pillows. “No, I’m not. Ride my fucking face, Y/N.” He spoke, staring at you. “I’m not going to ask you again.”</p>
<p>You hesitated though. You had never ridden someone’s face before, let alone someone like Ben Solo. What if you crushed him or something? There were so many possible ways for this to go wrong.</p>
<p>“For fuck’s sake.” He grumbled before he yanked you up to him, lifting you up with ease and put your pussy right above his face. “When I ask you to do something, you do it.”</p>
<p>“I don’t think this is such a good-fuuuuuuuck.” You stopped halfway through your rant to let out a shiver, his tongue going back to what he was previously doing but this time it felt so much deeper. </p>
<p>His hands were gripping onto each of your thighs and he was eating you out like a madman, eyes closed as if he were in heaven. You felt the exact same way and soon found yourself grinding against him again but this time his nose was bumping against your clit in the most delicious way. </p>
<p>“That’s it, baby, that’s it. Ride my fucking face.” Ben praised from under you as he moved his hand to smack your ass, your back arching at the pain. </p>
<p>“If you keep doing that I’m gonna cum, Ben.” You warned but he either didn’t hear you or didn’t care, two fingers now going in and out of you while he lightly sucked your clit.</p>
<p>You had nowhere to put your hands, trying to find something to hold onto as you felt the crest of your orgasm rising in your belly. After a minute you just gave up, moving so that your hands could grasp onto his legs as you picked up your speed. </p>
<p>“Shit, shit, shit!” You cursed as the tingling spread throughout your whole body, your walls fluttering as a feeling of deep euphoria washed over your body. You could feel the wetness gushing out of you as you rode out your high on his face, vision going black and stars appearing. </p>
<p>It took a few minutes before you came back down, your pussy still sensitive as he gave it more gentle licks. You couldn’t catch your breath and felt your body collapse but he was there to catch you, easily flipping you over so that you were on your back. </p>
<p>You stared at him, noticing how shiny his chin and nose were, and let out a slight laugh. You could not believe you just rode the face of Ben fucking Solo.</p>
<p>“What’s so funny?” He asked but you just shook your head, vision still blurry. </p>
<p>“I can’t believe I just came on your face. You. Ben Solo.” You confessed, sitting up on your elbows to watch him. He looked just as wrecked as you felt but you also realized he hadn’t gotten to cum.</p>
<p>“You did so well, kitten.” He praised, kissing you softly so that you could taste yourself. It was sweet with a slight tang, the wetness smearing across your face. “But do you think you can still be good for my cock?”</p>
<p>Even though your body was screaming at you, you quickly agreed. You would do anything this man said at the moment, that’s how much power he held over you right now. Ben gave you a smirk and kissed you one more time before standing to remove the rest of his clothing.</p>
<p>You noticed the wet stain that was on his underwear and smiled, knowing it was from you. The smile quickly fell when he revealed just how <i>big</i> he was. You were suddenly very grateful that there was so much foreplay. </p>
<p>He must have noticed your apprehension because he slowly ran his hand over it, giving it a few slow strokes that hypnotized you. “Don’t worry, it’ll fit.”</p>
<p>
  <i>Even during sex, he’s a cocky motherfucker.</i>
</p>
<p>“Ha ha.” You responded dryly before he crawled on top of you. You licked your lips and tentatively reached out your hand to grip it, watching as it jumped at your touch. Precum had collected at the top and you swiped your thumb across the head, watching his eyes screw shut in the pleasure.</p>
<p>“If you do that I’m gonna cum before I can get in that tight pussy.” He rasped before capturing your tiny wrist in his large hand, his eyes darker than normal. </p>
<p>You got the hint and let go, instead choosing to raise your hand to run your fingers through his hair gently. The subtle affection caught him off guard and he actually blushed and ducked his hair, clearing his throat.</p>
<p>“Are you ready?” He asked you and you wanted to scream how badly you wanted it but you just nodded, breath catching in your throat as he rubbed the tip up and down your slit.</p>
<p>Ben slowly slid himself inside and you could’ve sworn his eyes rolled into the back of his head. You weren’t much better though, your sex clenching as he stretched you almost painfully. The feeling of him inside of you felt so right, so fucking good.</p>
<p>“Fuck you’re so tight, Y/N.” He moaned, giving an experimental thrust into you which had you fisting your hands into the sheets. He noticed. “I’m gonna destroy this pussy.” </p>
<p>After he said that he started picking up the pace. There was nothing slow or gentle about it, this was pure passion and lust, and you were not complaining at all. He fucked you like it was the end of the world, your own hips meeting his thrusts to get more pleasure.</p>
<p>Ben swooped down and stole a kiss from you, panting onto your swollen lips as his hair fell into his eyes. He looked like an angel...or a devil, you didn’t know which to compare him to either way it was unlike anything you had ever experienced.</p>
<p>One of his hands snaked around your throat and squeezed which made your breath hitch. He wasn’t truly choking you but the thrill of it was making your stomach do flips. </p>
<p>He pulled out of you suddenly and told you to get on all fours, smacking your ass in the process. You happily obliged and turned over, raising your butt in the air in a taunting manner. You let out a yelp when he bit down on it. </p>
<p>“Naughty kitten.” He said before positioning himself once more. He pushed in with ease and with this new angle, hit your special spot. You both let out a moan as you tightened around him, falling onto your elbows instead of your hands.</p>
<p>Ben wasn’t having it though, he didn’t want you hiding your face. He wrapped his knuckles around your hair and pulled, making your neck arch painfully. “Uh uh, Y/N. I want to see that pretty face when you cum on my cock.” He groaned while picking up speed, noticing the tears that were sliding down your cheek from the pressure building inside you once more.</p>
<p>“Please Ben, please!” You begged loudly, mouth open and eyes screwed shut as he fucked you from behind. You had never known pleasure like this and you didn’t think you could ever go back to before, it would never be able to compare.</p>
<p>“Please what, kitten? Use your words.” He said while thrusting hard with each word, driving his point home.</p>
<p>“Please let me cum on your cock, Ben. I need it so bad...I’ve been so good!” You practically wailed, your hands fisting the pillows. He dipped his head down and bit down on your shoulder, an animalistic growl rumbling in his chest.</p>
<p>“Do it, cum on my cock Y/N. Cum on this fucking cock.” He seethed, using his arms to pick up your upper body so that he was fucking you while kneeling. He had your head turned so that you were sharing each other's breaths, your eyes half-lidded as you watched him come undone with you.</p>
<p>“I-I-I…” You whimpered before your orgasm hit you like a ton of bricks, your lips forming a perfect O as he fucked you through it. It was the most powerful one you had ever felt and it seemed to go on for years, Ben’s own orgasm meeting with your own in a violent passion that consumed you both.</p>
<p>His cock pulsed inside you as he came, his lips swallowing yours to quiet the moan that was begging to be let out. His whole body was shuddering, his arms wrapped tight around your smaller frame as you rode it out together.</p>
<p>After a minute, when you both began to breathe on your own, he laid both of you down on the bed. He was still inside of you but you didn’t care, your head laying on his chest while he played absentmindedly with your hair.</p>
<p>Neither of you had words to explain what just happened. You didn’t even know if you wanted to explain it. Now that you were thinking a little clearer you started to worry, worry that he was going to leave or something along those lines.</p>
<p>It was as if Ben could sense your unease though, a warm kiss being placed on your sweaty forehead. “I’m not going anywhere. Rest.” He whispered into your ear, fumbling for the covers and pulling them over you.</p>
<p>That was all that you needed to relax, his voice. You nodded and let out a tiny yawn, ready to sleep for forty light-years. Inside this hotel room, you were both safe and sound. Nothing mattered and you could deal with the consequences tomorrow.</p>
<p>For now, you were going to enjoy the time with your favorite smuggler.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Promises</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Eek! SO glad you guys are loving this! I was going to make this chapter angst but with the way the election is going right now, I think we could all use some comfort! It is just fluff and feelings with this story and I hope you guys enjoy it! &lt;3</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>You were exhausted, more than exhausted actually. Your bones ached with each step, your brain was no longer functioning on a normal level, and you couldn’t count the number of times you had cried in the bathroom today.</p>
<p>Hux had been up your ass about the smallest things, finding fault with every job you did. First, you didn’t file the paperwork right, then your uniform was creased, and now you weren’t walking fast enough.</p>
<p>“Honestly Y/N, can you not do the simplest things right?” Hux snarled as he stalked past her, his lip curled and eyes full of hatred. “Maybe you should focus more on your job and not fucking the commander.”</p>
<p>There it was. There was the answer to why he was being so cruel, so critical. A week ago you had disclosed to him your relationship with Kylo. You had been putting it off for at least a month but when he had almost caught the two of you, you knew it needed to be done. </p>
<p>When you had told Hux you expected him to be surprised, shocked even, but not furious. After the paperwork was handed to him he had ripped it up in front of you, his gloved finger pointing directly at you as he ranted and raved.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <i>“I expected more from you, Y/N. I didn’t mistake you for some common whore!” Hux shot as he threw something against the wall. Your entire body flinched at the sound.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“I’m not, I just wanted to disclose-” You began, trying to stand up for yourself before you were cut off once more.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“That you think it’s okay to have a relationship with a superior officer? With Kylo Ren?” Hux spat his name as if it created poison in his mouth. “I thought you would be smarter than that.”</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Your lower lip started to tremble as he threw insult after insult, cheeks turning an embarrassing shade of red. You couldn’t understand why he was so upset about this. He didn’t like Kylo but that didn’t mean you were an enemy as well….right?</i>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>After that day it had been nothing but stress and pain. He was asking you to do tasks that were impossible and if you failed, he would give you a mark. It was also worth noting that your yearly review was coming up and if you had enough marks...you would be discharged. </p>
<p>You wondered in the back of your mind if that was his goal, to get rid of you. He was doing a damn good job of it if it was. </p>
<p>The worst part about this was that Kylo was away on a mission with his knights. He was on some remote planet and you weren’t able to communicate at all. You had no idea when he would be back and though it hurt to admit, you weren’t as strong by yourself as you were with him.</p>
<p>Kylo had shown you a new side to yourself when you began seeing each other so many months ago. You had always been curious about who was under the mask and when you accidentally caught him without while walking the ship late at night, you thought your heart would leap out of your chest.</p>
<p>Words couldn’t describe how beautiful he was but they could describe how haunted he looked. He looked as if his soul had been ripped from his very chest and that made your own call out to him, your feet bringing you to stand in front of him while you were still trapped in a trance.</p>
<p>Neither one of you said anything and when you realized just how close you had gotten, just how fucked you were if he was pissed, you immediately jumped back. Your hands were held out in front of you like one might do to show a cornered animal that they meant no harm. </p>
<p>Kylo stared at you for a minute before he left, his footsteps were quick but heavy. When he had disappeared behind the corner, you finally breathed. Then it hit you just how bad this could backfire.</p>
<p>You remembered those next few weeks and how anxious you were that he was going to come kill you, worried that your stupid hormones had just cost you your life. It was a pleasant surprise when he had knocked on your door and asked you to dinner.</p>
<p>After that night Kylo always seemed to be near you. You guys grew incredibly close not only physically, which you were afraid was all it would be, but emotionally. One night Kylo had asked you to stay and he looked so...vulnerable. He didn’t talk to you, didn’t open about his past or dark secrets, but he did lay his head on your chest and listen to your heart.</p>
<p>In that moment you had felt more naked than ever. You felt a connection between two wandering souls, a fate marked in the stars. It sent you spiraling and in that room, his hair tickling your chest, you realized you had fallen in love with Kylo Ren.</p>
<p>Your feelings for him had only grown since that night, heart aching to tell him all of your thoughts but knowing it would scare him off. You still hadn’t admitted to him that you loved him and you didn’t know if you ever would. </p>
<p>This was the first time he had been gone for longer than a day or two. You didn’t think it would be as hard as it was but with Hux trying to fire you and your feelings swallowing you from the inside out...it was becoming too much.</p>
<p>And that's how you found yourself in his quarters, wrapped up in his bed with the pillow wet from your tears. You hated how weak you felt in that moment, crying over everything and nothing.</p>
<p>Kylo’s scent was wrapped around you but it gave you little comfort, your fists clenching to the sheets in hopes that he would magically appear out of thin air. You stayed in a small ball for what seemed like hours, your mascara now smudged and voice hoarse from the sobs, when you heard your holopad chimed.</p>
<p>You rubbed your eyes and lazily reached for it, feeling a headache coming on as you tried to see who had messaged you so late at night. As soon as you saw the name you felt bile rise in your throat.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <b>Incoming Message from General Hux:</b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>Y/N, </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>I have noticed an alarming amount of strikes on your record and have submitted them for review with HR. There will be a meeting to sort this out in the morning. </b>
</p>
<p>
  <b>General Hux</b>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <i>This was it. You were going to get fired and you were powerless to stop it. You would have to leave your friends, your coworkers, and...and him.</i>
</p>
<p>Regret tasted sour in your mouth as the realization that you might not even get to say goodbye became apparent. This day was just not your day and you felt rage building up inside you, rage at yourself for allowing this but also rage towards Hux for acting this way.</p>
<p>In a sudden wave of fury, you threw your holopad and heard it crack as it hit the far wall. A scream followed afterwards and it took you a second to realize it was coming from you, your whole body shaking.</p>
<p>“Not the greeting I was expecting.” Came a low voice from the door, your head whipping around so fast that it twinged a muscle and you saw standing by the entrance was Kylo, still in his battle armour. </p>
<p>He looked tired, the same kind of tired you were. His eyes held dark circles and his hair looked like it hadn’t been washed at all. You felt relief wash over you like an ice bath, your anger fading away as the man you loved was finally home.</p>
<p>But he didn’t look as happy to see you. In fact, he looked pissed. You were going through so many emotions at one time that you could have sworn your eyes had crossed.</p>
<p>“Kylo.” You breathed, swinging your legs off the bed so you could stand to greet him. He didn’t respond.</p>
<p>“Kylo?” You whispered, voice cracking at the end. <i>Maybe he knows about Hux and he’s going to end things so I can leave, maybe he’s met someone else, maybe he’s realized I can’t be enough for him, maybe…</i></p>
<p>“You’re crying.” He hesitated, taking off his cloak and gloves before walking towards you. The soft light of the bedside lamp cast a glow across his face that made him look angelic and you felt yourself falling once more.</p>
<p>“Sorry.” You fumbled, wiping your face with the back of your hand and then wrapping your arms around yourself. “I look a mess, I’m sorry.”</p>
<p>“Why are you crying?” He pressed, gently raising up his hand to cup your cheek. His hand was surprisingly warm and you leaned into his touch, eyes closing as you relished in the calmness he could make you feel.</p>
<p>“It’s nothing, don’t worry.” You croaked, not opening your eyes just yet in fear that it would break this rare moment of intimacy. You knew you didn’t sound convincing at all but you didn’t want to burden him with your feelings, even if it was killing you on the inside.</p>
<p>“Y/N…” He prodded, his other hand coming up to hold the other side of your face. “Tell me. Now.”</p>
<p>You took a shuddering breath and finally looked at him...and your defenses fell. All of your emotions, your stresses, everything came to the surface and you let out a wail, burying your face into his chest as you let it all out of your system. </p>
<p>You were prepared for him to push you away or retreat, calling you out of your mind for acting so emotional. You were prepared for anger, for bitterness. You were prepared for him to throw you out and never speak to you again.</p>
<p>You were not prepared when he wrapped his arms around you and kissed your head, rocking the both of you back and forth. The security and love you felt in his embrace...it was incredible. It made you want to never leave this safe space, this home he had created for you.</p>
<p>Of course this only made you cry harder, the hardness of his tunic pressing uncomfortably into your cheek. None of that mattered now though, what mattered was that Kylo was comforting you and you felt the safest you had in months.</p>
<p>“I’m here.” He whispered into the side of your ear, giving it another soft kiss. “I missed you, Y/N.”</p>
<p>You pulled away, sniffling. “Y-You missed m-me?” You asked, voice shaky.</p>
<p>“I did. I didn’t realize how much I would miss your touch, your smell. I never realized how much I would miss you until I couldn’t see you.” He confessed and you could have sworn that his cheeks were pink.</p>
<p>A shy smile broke onto your face as you replayed what he said over and over in your head. The tears had stopped though your face was still swollen. You knew you looked like a complete mess but it didn’t matter in that moment.</p>
<p>Kylo missed <i>you</i>. He missed <i>you</i>. </p>
<p>“I missed you too, Kylo. I missed you so much.” You sighed, reaching up on your tiptoes to capture his lips in a soft kiss. He immediately returned it, his arms circling around your waist to pick you up. </p>
<p>“Promise to never leave me again?” You whispered into his mouth, pulling away to look into his beautiful brown eyes. His lips quirked on the edges and he nodded, giving you a quick peck before sitting you back down on the floor. </p>
<p>“I promise if you tell me what has you so upset.” He replied, eyebrows furrowed in worry. “Has someone done something to you?”</p>
<p>You knew Kylo better than anyone, which meant you knew that if he thought you were being treated unkindly that he would personally slaughter that person. But he also knew you, he knew how good your soul was and even if someone had wronged you you would give them a second chance.</p>
<p>“It’s a lot of things.” You said, hoping that he would just leave it at that. Kylo was a stubborn man though and he was suddenly kneeling before you so that you were eye level, lips twisted in a frown. You both knew he wasn’t buying it.</p>
<p>After a few minutes of his hard stare you finally caved, a loud sigh escaping your lips as you started prattling on about Hux. “I told him about our relationship and ever since then he has been unnecessarily hard on me, he’s trying to get me fired! He keeps calling me names and-”</p>
<p>Kylo shot up at the last part of your rant, his demeanor changing from concerned to furious in a nanosecond. “What did he call you?” He seethed, his fingers slowly inching towards his lightsaber.</p>
<p>“Kylo, please. It’s not important!” You began to plead but it fell on deaf ears. </p>
<p>“Not important? This man, and that is being generous, is insulting you, YOU, and you are trying to tell me it’s not important?” Kylo yelled which made you flinch back slightly. You knew his anger was not directed at you but it still scared you. He noticed you flinched and it seemed to phase him slightly, his stance relaxing just a bit. The next time he spoke was in a much softer tone.</p>
<p>“I don’t want anyone hurting you, Y/N. You…” He began but seemed to catch himself on whatever he was about to confess, shaking his head. “I can’t bear to see you like this.”</p>
<p>You smiled and raised your hand up to rub your thumb across his cheek, much like he did to you earlier, to calm him down. “And I appreciate that, I appreciate that so much but I don’t need you to go out and kill him. I just need you.”</p>
<p>It wasn’t the first time you had told Kylo that you needed his comfort but this was by far the most intimate. His breath hitched at your request and it seemed to melt him, bending down to swoop you into his arms and carry you to the bed.</p>
<p>You let out a giggle despite everything, the bed creaking under the weight of you both. You rolled over to your side and looked him up and down, realizing he was still fully clothed. </p>
<p>“You might get your bed dirty.” You remarked with a grin.</p>
<p>Kylo looked down at himself and chuckled, standing back up and going to the bathroom to change.</p>
<p>He emerged about three minutes later in his boxers and a loose shirt, pulling back the covers to slide in next to you. Once he was situated he patted his chest for you to come lay on him, his fingers immediately playing with your hair as you just listened to each other's breath.</p>
<p>“I’ve never felt like this before, about anyone.” Kylo murmured, probably thinking you were already asleep. You hadn’t moved in a while and if you were being honest you were about to fall asleep. “You make me feel loved.”</p>
<p>You bit down hard on your lip to keep from changing your breath, praying to the Maker that he would go on. Apparently they heard your prayers because he continued.</p>
<p>“I never want to lose you, Y/N. I can’t even think about it, about someone taking you from me. I will NEVER let you go. I won’t make the same mistakes my grandfather did.”</p>
<p>You puzzled at the statement but didn’t have time to dwell on it because what he said next made your heart stop.</p>
<p>“I love you.”</p>
<p>It was the smallest whisper, if you weren’t straining to hear you would have thought it was just passing wind. But it wasn’t. Kylo had just confessed that he loved you.</p>
<p>You felt tears come to your eyes which you tried to fight back, your stomach doing flips and your toes curling in excitement. If someone had told you this was how your night was going to go after this shit week, you would’ve slapped them.</p>
<p>Kylo didn’t say anything more and you waited a few more minutes before very slowly lifting your head up to peek at his face. His eyes were closed and he looked peaceful. Your eyes flickered over feature and freckle, love pouring out of your mouth at this point. </p>
<p>But you kept his secret locked in your heart. He would tell you when he was ready and for now you could keep it as a promise. A promise between the two of you. </p>
<p>You placed a very gentle kiss on his lips before laying your head back down, the smile on your face staying that way even when you had fallen into one of the best sleeps you had had in weeks. </p>
<p>You missed the smile that stretched across his face when you laid down.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Beauty and the Beast</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I'm back! This chapter is based off Beauty and the Beast but it's more abstract, not following the entire plot. This will also be two parts because this one is 8,064 words and I could just not write more. The second part will have smut!</p>
<p>I hope you all enjoy and as always, like and comment! Have an amazing day or night or whatever! &lt;3</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It had been two weeks since the First Order had invaded your planet and taken most of your people hostage. They had cut off the supply routes so that they could slowly starve you out, disabled your communications so that not a peep would be heard, and heavily surrounded the planet in their ships so that no one could get through.</p>
<p>You and your family, who were the rulers of the planet, had not been allowed to leave the palace in two weeks. Your father had gone to fight with his soldiers but with the communications destroyed, no one had any idea if he was dead or alive.</p>
<p>Your mother had you locked in your room for the majority of the time, two guards standing watch while you wasted the hours away either pacing back and forth or reading.</p>
<p>There was only so much stuff you could do until you got bored though, and you had reached that limit after the second day. You were itching to get out there and fight for your planet just like your people, wanting to make them proud and show them that they were not alone.</p>
<p>Unfortunately your mother wouldn’t allow it, warning you that you didn’t know just how dangerous it was out there. Their entire fleet was killing everyone, even the women and children, with no remorse. </p>
<p>The hardest part for you to grasp was the question of why.</p>
<p>You knew that your relations with the First Order were not the best but they certainly were not the worst, you still gave them the supplies that you could. As far as you knew there was nothing you had done to piss them off.</p>
<p>As the days grew longer and longer, the fighting grew closer and closer, you were surprised to be awoken with the sounds of birds chirping. You threw off your covers and rushed to your balcony doors, throwing them open, and gasped when you saw just how beautiful it was outside.</p>
<p>The suns were just peeking over the vast mountains, the rivers bubbling as the fish swam through them, and the atmosphere felt...calm. It was night and day compared to what it had been and you broke into a large smile when you realized what this meant. </p>
<p>
  <i>We won! We won!</i>
</p>
<p>You ran back into your room and looked in the mirror, fixing your bedhead to the best of your ability and putting on your favorite colored silk robe, before taking off down the hallway to the main hall. It was where you knew your parents would be celebrating, a big feast probably already being prepared. </p>
<p>But when you skidded to a halt and found the room empty, you furrowed your eyebrows. You could feel that something was off, feel it in your bones, but you tried to remain optimistic.</p>
<p>
  <i>Perhaps they are in the meeting room with the generals? That would make sense…</i>
</p>
<p>You didn’t rush this time though, your feet padding softly along the marble floor. Each step you took felt harder and harder, a heavy feeling sinking in your stomach.</p>
<p>When the doors of the meeting room came into view you saw that they were opened and let out a large sigh of relief. <i>Thank the maker!</i> You tiptoed over to it and peeked around the edge, smiling falling almost immediately.</p>
<p>You could see your father and mother sitting at the table but they looked sad, hopeless. You also saw many men and women in uniforms you did not recognize. There was a man standing behind your parents talking lowly, he had ginger hair and what you would consider a handsome face if he didn’t scowl so much. Behind him was...someone. They were dressed all in black and had a mask over their face, a mask that looked like…</p>
<p>“Kylo Ren.” You gasped, heart pounding in your chest before you slapped a hand over your mouth. You quickly fell back against the wall and shut your eyes, trying to control your breathing in hopes that no one had heard you. </p>
<p>After a moment you relaxed, opening your eyes, only to feel your body seize up in fear. The man with the red hair was standing in front of you, eyeing you up and down. It felt as if someone had just thrown you into an ice lake on Hoth.</p>
<p>“Well, well, well. The princess, I presume.” He taunted, eyes cruel.</p>
<p>You looked down the hallway and immediately started running, your flight or fight instinct kicking in as you tried to go as fast as you could. There were some shouts behind you but with the adrenaline spiking in and pounding in your ears, it was like you were deaf.</p>
<p>The door to the outside was within your reach, your robe flowing behind you, and you felt hope rise. You didn’t know where you would go once you made it outside but you knew you had to <i>hide.</i></p>
<p>Just as you reached out your hand to grasp the glass knob, your body froze. No, it literally froze. It felt as if you were suspended in time, a slight buzzing going throughout your body. It felt like witchcraft and for a moment you thought that this was just a dream, a terrible nightmare.</p>
<p>But when Kylo Ren came into view, you knew it wasn’t.</p>
<p>“Where are you running off to, pet?” He puzzled, amusement in his tone. “There is no one here to save you.”</p>
<p>You swallowed and refused to meet his mask, jaw set tight. You weren’t going to give this creature any of your time.</p>
<p>“Ah, I can see your mind Princess. So quick you are to judge me yet your reputation is one of kindness and tolerance. Do we have the right one?” Kylo goaded, bending down to follow your eyeline. You shut them tight.</p>
<p>“Leave my family alone, monster.” You spat, the bitterness and anger foreign to you. Kylo just chuckled and released you from his hold, hand waving over your face which made you fall into a dreamless slumber.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Your head was pounding and your mouth was incredibly dry when you woke up, completely disoriented from whatever had happened to you. The last thing you remembered was being in your bedroom, the birds chirping...the silence, the chill, and then, then the monster. </p>
<p>You stood up quickly only to stumble back down again, your body not used to the sudden change in gravity. You took the opportunity to look around and noticed you were in a cell of some kind. It didn’t look like the ones back at home, this one was much nicer, but a cell is still a cell.</p>
<p>The floors were cold and the lights were blinding, a cot laying on the side of the room with a curtain drawn over what you assumed was a toilet. You don’t remember using anything, thank the Maker, but you also didn’t know how long you had been out for.</p>
<p>You crawled over to the door and started banging on it with whatever strength you had left, your chains rattling with every movement. </p>
<p>“HELLO! IS ANYONE THERE? CAN ANYONE HEAR ME?” You yelled, voice cracking painfully. You tried to rub it soothingly though it provided little comfort.</p>
<p>“MY NAME IS PRINCESS Y/N! I HAVE BEEN KIDNAPPED! PLEASE HELP ME!” You pleaded, tears coming to your eyes as you listened to the screaming silence. No one was around, you didn’t know where you were or what happened to your parents, it was terrifying. </p>
<p>Despite your mind telling you to stay strong, knowing it’s what your mother would say, you were crumbling. You buried your face into your knees and let out a pitiful sob. </p>
<p>You missed the sound of heavy footsteps, your cries only increasing in volume the longer you were held there. When the door to your prison opened you let out a startled shriek and scrambled to the farthest corner. </p>
<p>You wiped your face and wrapped your arms around yourself, your cries now just soft sniffles as you stared at the intruder. It was the same monster who had taken everything from you. Kylo Ren.</p>
<p>“Kriff I can hear you across the ship, pet.” He complained, voice modulated through the terrifying mask. </p>
<p>“Maybe you shouldn’t kidnap people then, monster.” You spat, pushing yourself farther away. There was nowhere else for you to go but you wanted to be as far away from him as possible. </p>
<p>“I didn’t kidnap you, you were given to me.” Kylo explained as if it were common knowledge, looking around the room. “They offered you, their daughter, as a token if we would leave them alone.”</p>
<p>You shook your head, refusing to believe the lies that he was so obviously telling. <i>There is no way my parents would do that. They wouldn’t. They couldn’t.</i></p>
<p>“You’re lying!” You exclaimed, anger turning your cheeks bright red. “My parents would never do that to me.”</p>
<p>Kylo simply shrugged, brushing off some dust from his cloak. “Search your feelings, princess. You know the answer.”</p>
<p>You did not want to search your feelings for you were afraid what you would find there. Even if your parents did do what this monster claimed, they had to have good reason, right? Perhaps it was a part of some massive plan that you didn’t know about. </p>
<p>“My name is Y/N.” You muttered, the cold air of the cell finally getting to you, as you began to shiver slightly. “I want to go back home.”</p>
<p>“No. We made an agreement and you are mine now.” Kylo grunted, his breathing growing heavier as it crackled through his mask. “You can never go back.”</p>
<p>You let out a shuddering breath before another sob broke past your lips, hiding your face in your knees once more. You didn’t want to face that he was probably right, you didn’t want to spend the rest of your life in this prison. Everything you had ever known, had ever loved, was now ripped away from you and all you could do was cry. </p>
<p>Kylo stood there awkwardly, shuffling from foot to foot, until he grew annoyed at your cries. “Get up.” He ordered, holding out his hand for her to take as he undid her chains. “You’re being moved.”</p>
<p>You looked up at him, vision blurry from your tears, and wiped your nose. “I am?” You whispered, slightly concerned that you would be thrown in a worse cell.</p>
<p>His patience with you snapped and he took a step to yank you up himself, immediately pulling his hand away from you as if it burned him. “Do you wanna stay here?” He asked annoyed.</p>
<p>“N-No.” You replied, shaking your head. </p>
<p>“Then move.” He griped, turning around and walking down the long hallway. You quickly fell behind him, glancing around and seeing rows upon rows of rooms that looked just like yours. It made you nauseous. </p>
<p>You climbed up a flight of stairs before you heard people. Hope rose in your chest, thinking that maybe someone would rescue you, but fell when no one even spared you a glance. </p>
<p>Everyone was doing something, whether that be paperwork or running around, but stopped to salute when Kylo walked past them. You were trying to keep up with his long strides but it was exhausting. </p>
<p>“Where are we?” You puzzled, spotting a window that looked out into the emptiness of space.</p>
<p>“The Finalizer.” He replied shortly, turning down a hallway. You immediately recognized the name, knowing it was the First Order’s main ship. It was huge from what you could see on your planet but it was even more so in person. You didn’t know how no one was getting lost.</p>
<p>“You will be in a room next to mine. There will be a door connecting the two but only I have the key.” Kylo explained, turning to look at you before letting out an annoyed huff. He slowed down so you could catch up. </p>
<p>“You are not allowed to leave your room but whatever you need, let me know and I will try to accommodate.”</p>
<p>“I need a ship so I can go home.” You sassed, rolling your eyes as he ignored your request. </p>
<p>“Do you have any questions?” </p>
<p>You had a ton of questions, millions of questions actually. But your pride was getting in the way of asking any, you didn’t want to rely on this monster for anything. However you couldn’t help but ask the most burning one, the one that was going to haunt you for the rest of your life.</p>
<p>“Why?”</p>
<p>Kylo stiffened at the question and didn’t meet your gaze. You looked down and saw that he was clenching and unclenching his hands in a way that meant he was probably about to punch something. </p>
<p>Before he could, you arrived in front of a door. It was in the hallway that wasn’t bustling with activity, which she was grateful for. He produced a card from his tunic and swiped it, stepping back to let the door slide open with a hiss.</p>
<p>You couldn’t stop the gasp that left your mouth when your new room was revealed. It wasn’t at all what you were expecting. This room almost exactly mirrored yours from home, right down to the same bedsheets. The smell of roses and vanilla caressed you like a lover would, making your body relax. You forgot where you were for a moment and let out a small laugh, rushing past Kylo to take in everything.</p>
<p>
  <i>My favorite books, my old dolls, it even has my hairbrush! It’s just like home!</i>
</p>
<p>“Do you like it?” Kylo asked, his voice strained as though he was concealing emotion. You turned to nod but then reality hit you like a ton of bricks, your smile sinking into a frown. </p>
<p>This wasn’t really your room. When you didn’t hear the birds chirping or your mother calling your name...and you realized that it wasn’t home. It may look like it, but it was just another prison.</p>
<p>“I want to go home.” You whispered. “This isn’t my home.”</p>
<p>This angered him greatly, you could feel the shift in the air. You didn’t know what he was expecting out of you though, why would he think you would agree to any type of cage even if it were painted gold! Kylo’s shoulders shook and in a flurry of motion, he had ignited his lightsaber and cut through a desk in the corner like butter.</p>
<p>“<b>It is now</b>! You are <b>mine</b>!” He bellowed, his mask breaking up from the sheer volume. “You can’t go home!”</p>
<p>Anger welled up inside you and you threw the nearest thing you could reach, a pillow, right at his face. He easily deflected it though and let out another menacing growl. </p>
<p>“Leave me alone, monster!” You screamed back, lower lip trembling. He pointed his lightsaber at you for a split second, probably debating on if he wanted to kill you, before turning it off and storming out the door.</p>
<p>You drew in quick, sharp breaths before turning around and throwing yourself onto the bed, crying into the soft sheets.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>It felt like days when you had woken up, your face still wet with your tears. You looked to the clock on the nightstand and sighed when you realized it had only been a few hours. </p>
<p>You rolled over to your back and stared up at the ceiling, your mind empty but your heart crying out in pain. It was a strange feeling, this numbness. You had never felt something like this and you didn’t want to ever again, it was like being injected with a teaspoon of poison every day. A slow death that made you wish for a quick one.</p>
<p>After growing bored of wallowing and trying but failing to go back to sleep, you sat up on your elbows and glanced around the room. It was just like the one back at home and whoever had designed had a keen eye for detail. You trailed your fingertips over the golden pattern of the sheets, worrying your bottom lip. </p>
<p>
  <i>If I’m going to be stuck here I might as well do something…</i>
</p>
<p>You cautiously slid off the bed, your feet hitting the floor with a soft thud. <i>Jeez, even the rug feels the same</i>. You looked over at the desk that had been sliced in half, shaking your head, before moving on to the bookshelf. A single finger ran across the spines of the book before you selected one of your favorites, tugging it out and tucking it under your arm. </p>
<p>Once you had your book and began running the bath, you began to undress. You were still dressed in your robes from when you had been taken and it made you feel grimy. After discarding everything, you slipped in the hot water and let out a loud moan as you felt your muscles relaxing.</p>
<p>Your moment of zen was ruined however when there was a loud knocking on your door. You kept your eyes closed though, electing to ignore him. He had terrorized you enough, he could wait until you were done.</p>
<p>“Answer the door, princess.” Kylo called though it was muffled from the door. You rolled your eyes and slowly stood up to step out of the bath, wrapping a fuzzy towel around yourself.</p>
<p>The sound of your wet feet walking to the door was enough to alert him. “Finally.” He grumbled. “Open the door.”</p>
<p>“No, I was in the middle of a bath.” You responded, tightening the towel. “What do you want?”</p>
<p>It was silent for a moment and you thought that he had left before you heard him clear his throat. You noticed that his voice sounded different, it wasn’t as robotic. <i>Is his mask off?</i></p>
<p>“Will... Will you join me for dinner?” </p>
<p>You turned your head to the side, trying to make sure you heard him correctly. He was asking you to...dinner? This <b>monster</b> who had ripped you from your family had the audacity to ask you out like it was the most normal thing in the world?</p>
<p>
  <i>Where does he get off?</i>
</p>
<p>“No.” You replied, tone short. </p>
<p>The sound of his labored breathing was loud and you could tell he was trying hard not to get angry with you. “I am trying to be polite with you, pet.” </p>
<p>“You’ve taken me from my home, locked me away in some prison, and you think I want to have dinner with you?” You ranted, fists tightening around your towel. “You must be out of your mind.”</p>
<p>Kylo began pounding on your door to the point where you were afraid he was going to break it down. “<b>I TOLD YOU TO JOIN ME FOR DINNER.</b>”</p>
<p>But you were not phased by his anger, long past it actually, and you replied with just as much venom. “And I told you <b>no</b>. I’d much rather eat with a Hutt before I ate with you.”</p>
<p>“Then go ahead and starve!” He exploded, the sound of glass being thrown making you wince. You turned around and ran back to the bathroom, making sure not to slip, before slamming the door as hard as you could. </p>
<p>
  <i>I’m not going to cry, I won’t do it. I won’t let him make me cry.</i>
</p>
<p>You kept repeating that in your head as you sank back into the tub, ignoring the sound of your stomach growling as you tried to rid your mind of Kylo Ren.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>By the time you had cleaned yourself and let the water grow cold, the moaning of your stomach had turned into a scream. You had slipped back into a simple gown you had found in the closet and torn through every drawer in hopes of finding food. Unfortunately there wasn’t even a crumb.</p>
<p>The clock told you it was a little after midnight and after listening through the door that connected your rooms, you figured he was asleep. <i>Surely I can sneak out and grab some bread without him finding out?</i> After another complaint from your stomach your mind was made up.</p>
<p>You slipped on a pair of fuzzy socks and went over to the door that led out to the hallway. There was a button on the side of the door and you hit, jumping back when the door opened. <i>Huh, didn’t think it’d be that easy.</i></p>
<p>Your relief was short lived though when you saw two masked men standing outside your door. They were dressed similar to how Kylo was but they had much more intimidating weapons in their hands. It didn’t take a genius to know they were guarding you from leaving.</p>
<p>They both turned to you when the door opened and you involuntarily took a step back, your hands becoming sweaty. “I, um, I…” You tried to explain but words were suddenly failing you.</p>
<p>“So this is the princess, eh?” The taller of the two remarked, head tilting to the side. “I knew princesses were supposed to be beautiful but I didn’t think I’d be looking at an angel.” </p>
<p>You immediately blushed scarlet and looked at the floor. The other one piped up, their voice deeper than the first one. “Stop it, Vicrul. Kylo wouldn’t like you flirting with his pet.”</p>
<p>“I’m not his pet.” You interrupted, frowning. “I’m Y/N.”</p>
<p>“Vicrul.” The first one explained, sticking out his hand for you to take. You cautiously reached out and shook it lightly. “It’s nice to meet you, Y/N.”</p>
<p>You turned to the other one who was back to standing at their post, not interested in the slightest in your conversation. “Trudgen.”</p>
<p>“It’s nice to meet you both.” You stated, bowing your head. </p>
<p>“What’s got you coming out of your cage? Kylo didn’t tell us anything.” </p>
<p>“Well, you see…” You began, twisting your fingers nervously. “I’m really hungry and was hoping I could find just some bread and milk.”</p>
<p>Vicrul and Trudgen shared a look, though you couldn’t tell anything from the masks, before they looked at you.</p>
<p>“Of course!” Vicrul said. </p>
<p>“No.” Trudgen shook his head</p>
<p>Vicrul and Trudgen then began to argue, pointing at each other as they both tried to reason with each other. It was hard to understand through their masks but you assumed Vicrul was fighting for you.</p>
<p>After a minute Vicrul simply ignored Trudgen’s complaints and grabbed your hand, tugging you down the hallway. “Don’t mind him princess, he’s just in a bad mood.”  Vicrul laughed. </p>
<p>You offered a small chuckle and tucked a piece of hair behind your ear. Trudgen was following behind you grumpily, telling Vicrul just how much trouble they could get into, but it fell on deaf ears.</p>
<p>Soon the smell of food hit your nose and your mouth filled with saliva, stomach crying out for whatever it was. Vicrul and Trudgen gave you a look and you shrugged. </p>
<p>“What? I’m hungry.” You stated, ears burning from embarrassment. </p>
<p>“Don’t worry, we’ll fix the problem soon.” Vicrul comforted, pointing to the cafeteria. “Why don’t you find a seat with kissass over here? I’ll grab one of everything.”</p>
<p>You nodded and looked back at Trudgen, who you could just tell was rolling his eyes, before following you. You picked a table in a far corner even though no one was around and got comfy, folding your hands in your lap.</p>
<p>Trudgen looked uncomfortable in the tiny place, constantly shifting from side to side. “Are you alright?” You asked, concern laced in your voice. “Do I need to find somewhere else to sit?”</p>
<p>“No, it’s fine.” He grunted, looking past you to a far off corner.</p>
<p>You waited for a minute before your curiosity got the best of you, turning to face Trudgen. “Why do you wear that mask?” </p>
<p>“It’s part of my uniform.”</p>
<p>“Do you ever get to take it off?”</p>
<p>“When I want to.”</p>
<p>A beat of silence before he let out a sigh, obviously agitated by your endless questions. “I’m not going to take it off.”</p>
<p>You pouted and put your head in your hand, giving your best puppy dog eyes. “Please, please, please!” You begged, deflating when he shook his head. “Why not?”</p>
<p>“Because.”</p>
<p>“Because why?”</p>
<p>“Because.”</p>
<p>“Because why?”</p>
<p>He looked like he was about to slit your throat at your persistence, his hand lingering over his weapon, until Vicrul laid an enormous plate of food in front of you which immediately caught your attention.</p>
<p>“Wow.” You mumbled, eyes wide, before you reached out and started to scarf down as much as you could. You knew your mother would scold you for your lack of manners but you were hungry, manners be damned!</p>
<p>“Slow down there Y/N. It’s not going anywhere.”</p>
<p>You said something indistinguishable, covering your mouth to prevent food from falling out, before swallowing hard. “You won’t get in trouble for this will you?”</p>
<p>Vicrul shrugged and, much to your surprise, took off his mask so he could take a drink. “Eh, he’ll be okay.”</p>
<p>He looked handsome, more handsome than the men on your planet, and young. You wouldn’t think he was a dangerous man if he passed you in the streets but I guess that was the point. </p>
<p>“Why are you staring?” He pointed out, confused. “Why is she staring?”</p>
<p>Trudgen just shook his head, pointing to his mask. “She’s been trying to get me to take mine off.”</p>
<p>Vicrul smirked and winked at you. “He’s not half as pretty as I am, princess.” </p>
<p>You rolled your eyes and smiled, eating slower now that your stomach wasn’t protesting. Talking with Vicrul and Trudgen, well more with the former than the latter, made you forget about your problems. They treated you normally and it made you feel at ease, made you relax.</p>
<p>After thirty minutes of eating and joking around, you felt your eyes growing heavy. You didn’t want to leave them but you also knew that you wouldn’t be able to stay awake for much longer.</p>
<p>They must have sensed it because Trudgen grabbed your plate and threw it away while Vicrul helped you out of your seat. The three of you began to walk back to your room, Trudgen even making a joke or two, before you felt someone staring at you.</p>
<p>You looked up and stopped in your tracks, heart stuttering as Kylo stood in the middle of the hallway. He looked <i>pissed</i>. </p>
<p>Vicrul quickly began to explain what had happened, trying to cover for you but was thrown against the wall by some invisible force that had you leaping behind Trudgen as if he would protect you.</p>
<p>Trudgen just moved to the side, exposing you to the monster, to stay out of the brawl that was inevitably going to happen. Vicrul was holding his arm in pain, wincing. </p>
<p>“Why are you out of your room, pet?” Kylo snarled, stalking towards you and roughly grabbing your upper arm. “I don’t remember giving you permission to leave.”</p>
<p>“I don’t need your permission.” You scowled, yanking your arm to try and get away with him. His grip was unrelenting though, squeezing you painfully. “Why did you hurt him?”</p>
<p>“He disobeyed the rules, just like you’re doing right now.” He replied, marching back to your room. “You shouldn’t have left your room.”</p>
<p>“You don’t tell me what to do!” You yelled, giving him one final shove which released your arm. As soon as you were free you took off down the hallway, the memory of a few days ago echoing in your head as you found yourself in the same predicament. </p>
<p>You slid quickly into another hallway, hearing Kylo shout behind you, and then blaster shots. Your heart leapt into your throat as you realized that someone was shooting at you. </p>
<p>“Stop! Stop! I’m not the bad guy!” You cried, throwing your hands in front of your face and crouching as more shots rang out. “Fuck, stop shooting!”</p>
<p>You tried to turn around but you were suddenly chest to chest with Kylo, who looked like he was about to murder you. You began to back up until another blast shot out, wincing as you thought it hit you.</p>
<p>But when Kylo let out a yell, you realized that it had missed you and hit him. He fell to the ground out of shock and turned to look behind him at the stormtrooper who had just realized their mistake.</p>
<p>Kylo began to choke the trooper in anger, his hand shaking with the rage he was feeling. You began to take this opportunity to sneak away, hoping that you could find Vicrul or Trudgen to put you on a ship, until you glanced back at the monster.</p>
<p>He was holding onto his leg and hissing in pain. The mask was still hiding his face but you could guess that his eyes were scrunched or he was biting his tongue to distract from the wound.</p>
<p>And for the first time since you had met him, you felt sorry for him. It was like when you were about to defeat the villain but then realized that they were just as human as you were. You hated that you were feeling bad for him after all the things you had done to you, you knew that you shouldn’t.</p>
<p>But despite your head screaming at you that you should run, you found yourself slowly walking back over to him. Kylo looked up at you but your eyes were trained on his leg. You could see out of the corner of your eye that Vicrul and Trudgen were watching with bated breath.</p>
<p>“Come on, you have to stand.” You hesitated, holding your hand out for him to take. “We’ll get you to the medical room.”</p>
<p>Kylo stared at you incredulously, not believing that you weren’t jumping at the chance to kill him or run away. After a beat of silence, Kylo took your hand and pulled himself up.</p>
<p>You, along with the help of Vicrul and Trudgen, walked him to the medical bay so he could get fixed up. While he was getting fixed up you felt something stir in you, a feeling that you hadn’t felt before. </p>
<p>It was as if something was there that wasn’t there before.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>After the blaster incident you found yourself opening up slightly more to Kylo. He had been inviting you to dine with every night and had even shown some patience when you would decline, not taking it to heart. </p>
<p>Kylo had given you a holopad that you could communicate with him whenever needed, along with Vicrul and Trudgen. You also were able to meet the rest of his “knights” as he called them. They were all pretty nice and welcoming and you started falling into a normal routine in this new life of yours though there were some moments that you missed your home.</p>
<p>One of those times was when you were playing a song on your holopad, one of your favorites, that you would dance to all the time at home. It reminded you of the grand balls that your family held, of all the pretty dresses and crowns you got to wear. </p>
<p>So when Kylo caught you middance, you felt embarrassed. He had apologized for intruding but didn’t leave, instead trying to figure out what you were doing. </p>
<p>“I’m dancing.” You mumbled shyly, putting your hands behind your back.</p>
<p>“Why?” He asked.</p>
<p>“It’s one of my favorite things to do...although I don’t really have the space for it here.”</p>
<p>“You don’t have the space to dance?” </p>
<p>You shook your head, gesturing to the small area that was the only empty part of your bedroom. “At home we had a grand ballroom with so many parties. I loved to go to them and dance the night away.” </p>
<p>Kylo hummed and glanced around your room. He had yet to take off his mask in front of you and it frustrated you greatly. You had asked him multiple times to reveal himself but he always brushed you off. You couldn’t figure out the reason why though, unless he was just terribly ugly.</p>
<p>“Would you like to have one?” He queried.</p>
<p>“One what?”</p>
<p>“A ball.”</p>
<p>Your eyes widened and you furiously nodded your head, bouncing over to him and taking his gloved hands in your own. “Can I? That would be so wonderful, Kylo!” You gushed, bouncing on the heels of your feet. </p>
<p>He let out a chuckle at your antics. “I’ll get arranged, pet.”</p>
<p>Before you could stop yourself you raised up on your tip toes and kissed the side of his mask in happiness, letting go of his hands to run to your dresser. You missed the way his breath trembled at your action, his fingers raising up to touch the spot where your lips had been. </p>
<p>“I know the perfect dress! I can do my hair, find my favorite shoes….” You prattled on, talking to yourself before you heard the door shut. You turned and saw the space where Kylo was now empty. You didn’t dwell on it though, turning back to the task at hand.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>After a few days of waiting the day finally arrived! You had gotten an invitation from Kylo, hand delivered, and realized that this was actually going to be an actual ball. It was to celebrate the Supreme Leader and his queen, whoever that was, in their union.</p>
<p>You didn’t know who this Supreme Leader was, you had heard people whisper about him but when you asked Vicrul about it he would shake his head. It was something you weren’t meant to know and while that got on your nerves, you usually found something else to distract yourself with.</p>
<p>Kylo had <i>actually</i> let you order a custom dress that was fit for a princess. You could have kissed him in excitement, twirling around when it finally arrived. It was a true princess dress that flowed out and had a long train. The color was one of your favorites, the one that went well with your eyes, and had small diamonds scattered around the skirt and bodice.</p>
<p>There was also a crown that went with it, a dainty one that was the perfect size. It had a large crystal in the middle with smaller gemstones decorating the sides. You were amazing at the details.</p>
<p>He had also hired someone to help you with your hair and makeup, which you were thankful for, as well as someone to help you into the dress. When you were finally done you felt your soul shining, a brilliant smile dawning your face that was almost unrecognizable.</p>
<p>The clock on your nightstand hit the nine and you realized that it was time for you to leave. You thanked the workers and said your goodbyes, picking up the skirt of your dress so you could walk to the door. It opened automatically and you saw Vicrul standing on the other side, wearing a nice suit and foregoing his helmet.</p>
<p>“Don’t you clean up nice?” You mused, offering him a curtsey which he returned with a bow. </p>
<p>“You look radiant, princess.” He remarked, holding out his arm for you to take. “Shall we?”</p>
<p>You grinned and nodded, tucking your arm underneath his own and making your way to wherever the ball was being held. You could hear the music echoing throughout the halls and it was making you giddy, your stomach twisting in knots.</p>
<p>“Do you think I will meet the Supreme Leader tonight? I will feel embarrassed if I don’t know his name…” You confessed, chewing the inside of your cheek.</p>
<p>“He knows who you are, don’t worry.” Vicrul soothed, patting your hand. “Just enjoy yourself, this is something that rarely happens.”</p>
<p>As you approached the doors that the music was coming from, you drew in a long breath. You knew no one that was going to be at this party and it made you nervous, not to mention the fact that the Supreme Leader would be looking for you. </p>
<p>“Breathe.” Vicrul whispered into your ear before walking you through the gilded doors, your eyes widening and mouth falling open in surprise.</p>
<p>The room was gorgeous with it’s high ceilings and marble floor. There were two thrones at the top of a giant staircase that were currently vacant while the dance floor was alive with dancing and conversing. Everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves, the light of the crystal chandelier casting an ethereal glow that seemed to make the room sparkle.</p>
<p>You noticed a few people turned towards you, giving you a polite smile which you returned, before turning back to their conversations. All of the ladies were wearing evening gowns and you suddenly felt self conscious, your dress was the most lavish one in the room and you didn’t want to stick out like a sore thumb.</p>
<p>Vicrul was leading you through the crowd, saying something that your ears weren’t picking up, until he stopped abruptly. You bumped into his back and winced, rubbing your nose before you heard him introducing you to someone.</p>
<p>“Supreme Leader, this is Princess Y/N.” He said loudly, trying to be heard over the orchestra that was hidden away in a corner of the room. You were pushed in front of him and the man in question turned to you, giving you a smile.</p>
<p>It was suddenly hard to breathe as you stared into the deep amber eyes of the Supreme Leader, your eyes wandering over his face. He had a broad nose that was quite handsome and moles that gave him a boyish charm. His hair, the color of ink, fell down in soft waves that had your hands itching to run through.</p>
<p>His body was quite large, towering over you but not threateningly. You did not expect him to look so young and it must have shown on your face, eyelashes fluttering as you licked your suddenly dry lips.</p>
<p>“Supreme Leader.” You murmured, dropping into a curtsey that would have made your mom proud. He stopped you halfway through, grabbing your hand and pulling you back up.</p>
<p>“No need for that, princess. It is an honor.” He charmed, bringing your hand up to kiss. When you heard his voice, something inside you poked you. You could have sworn that you had heard that voice before.</p>
<p>“Would you like to dance?” He asked, holding out his hand to you. You were still trying to figure out where you had heard him from and nodded, not understanding his question until you were pulled into the middle of the room. </p>
<p>The crowd parted immediately, allowing you both enough room as another song began playing. You knew the dance by heart and started following his lead, though your focus was somewhere else. </p>
<p>“Are you enjoying yourself?” You heard him ask as he pulled you close, his smell enveloping you and making your head spin.<br/>“Hmm? Oh yes, it’s wonderful.” You replied absentmindedly, not watching where you were going until you accidentally stepped on his foot. “Oh no, I’m so sorry!” You apologized immediately, hating that you had just embarrassed yourself in front of him.</p>
<p>But he just chuckled and shook you off, leading you into another twirl. When you were at the edge of the crowd, his hand tightening around yours to pull you back in, was when it clicked in your mind. </p>
<p>“Kylo.” You gasped, missing your step and clinging to his shirt. He looked down at you and smirked, a sly wink sent your way before you began dancing again.</p>
<p>“I was wondering when you would figure it out.” He confessed, his legs brushing against your skirt as the song began to climb to it’s climax. “I thought you had already known but were just playing dumb.”</p>
<p>You were still in shock though, eyes never leaving his. The man who had captured you, had held you hostage, had made you laugh, had comforted you when you were lonely….was the Supreme Leader.</p>
<p>“Why didn’t you tell me?” You asked, eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “Why do all this for such a reveal?” </p>
<p>“I didn’t tell you for your own protection.” He replied, your bodies so close together that you were sharing the same breath. “And this isn’t for me...it’s for you.”</p>
<p>“Me?” You breathed, your mind working overtime as you tried to sort out what was going on. “Why are you doing this for me?”</p>
<p>Kylo didn’t answer, grabbing your hips and raising you up in the air along with the other partners on the dance floor. You felt your cheeks heat up as his hands burned through your dress, relishing in the butterflies that were in your belly.</p>
<p>“Because I have fallen in love with you, Y/N.” Kylo proclaimed, stopping in the middle of the room while everyone around them continued on. “You have bewitched me.”</p>
<p>You blinked up at him, your mind going blank as you processed what he just said. Kylo Ren had fallen in love with you, a princess. He was in love with you. You recalled all of the times you had spent together, the nights where he would read you to sleep or the quick lunches between his work that he made special time for.</p>
<p>
  <i>It was right in front of me this whole time, how he felt. I should’ve noticed the signs but I guess….I guess I was too busy falling myself….</i>
</p>
<p>He led you away from the crowd and snuck you both out a side door, the cool air from the hallway welcoming you. Kylo then turned to you and held your hands in his, eyes full of adoration.</p>
<p>“I like you without the mask.” You whispered, noticing the dimple on his cheek when it quirked up in a smile. You could feel yourself growing closer, his eyes flickering between your own and your lips. </p>
<p>You closed your eyes and raised up on your toes, capturing his lips in yours. It was a gentle kiss, one that was unsure but still full of passion. Kylo returned it easily, his hands coming to cup your face to deepen it.</p>
<p>It was as if everything in the universe had fallen into place. There was no war, no worries, no good or evil. It was just you and Kylo. You moved your lips against his as if you had been doing it your whole life, a perfect fit.</p>
<p>After a minute you both had to pull back for air, your chest rising and falling as you stared at him. His eyes were full of a passion most people would go their whole lives without and it made you pull him back, the kiss much more urgent this time.</p>
<p>Kylo gently pushed you against the wall and let his hands roam your sides, his tongue swiping along your lower lip in question. You opened up your mouth for him and let out a slight moan at his actions, your body quickly turning to jelly. He was knocking down all of your defenses like he knew your body better than you. You raised your hands up and ran them through his hair, which was <i>so</i> soft, before you gave a gentle tug.</p>
<p>“Fuck…” He gasped into your mouth, the sound going straight to your core. You clenched your thighs together and bit down on his bottom lip softly before pulling away. You were sure that your lips were swollen and cheeks flushed from what just happened.</p>
<p>“We can’t do this out here, Kylo.” You said though you weren’t trying to be convincing. He looked conflicted but then nodded, stepping away so that he wouldn’t pull you back into him.</p>
<p>“I need you, Y/N.” He pleaded, trying to take deep breaths so that he wouldn’t look suspicious. </p>
<p>“No I know but we can’t do that out he-” You began explaining before he shook his head.</p>
<p>“That’s not what I meant. I mean I need you beside me, I want you beside me. Forever.”</p>
<p><i>Forever? Does he mean…</i>.</p>
<p>“Yes. I want you to rule beside me. That’s what this whole party was about, it was to introduce you as my queen.” He confided, staring down at you in agony as if this was the hardest thing for him to say. “Please, Y/N.”</p>
<p>You wanted to say yes, you wanted to throw yourself into his arm and live happily ever after with him. But something was holding you back, preventing you from giving yourself to him.</p>
<p>Kylo knew too, his shoulders dropping. “You still want to go home.”</p>
<p>Your mouth opened and closed before you managed a nod, looking down at your feet. <i>I let myself get distracted, I let myself fall in love but what about my family? What about my home? What would they think of me?</i></p>
<p>“I’m sorry, Kylo.” You apologized, tears coming to your eyes. “I love you, truly I do. But my home….I miss them.” You mumbled, your heart breaking as you saw the pain in his eyes.</p>
<p>It was a tense moment between the two of you before Kylo took a step back, his hands falling from your side. You wanted to reach out to him, to pull him back to you, but your body was not listening. It was like you were watching yourself from above, helpless to what was about to happen.</p>
<p>“Go to them.” Kylo faltered, not meeting your eyes. “I am setting you free.”</p>
<p>“Kylo I-” You called but he had already turned away and walked back into the ball, leaving you standing in the middle of the empty hallway. The music was taunting you now, echoing in your mind as if to remind you that you had just lost everything. </p>
<p>Do I want to go back home? I just want to see my parents one last time but I love him, I love Kylo. I don’t want to hurt him. I don’t want this to be so complicated.</p>
<p>And so as you went back and forth in your mind, you slowly slid to the ground as tears fell freely. You wished love wasn’t so complicated, you wished you could have the best of both worlds, but you knew that life was no fairytale. Life was just that, life. You had to make the most of it and believe that no matter what path you chose, it would turn out alright in the end. </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>You ran as fast you could in this dress, your hair falling out and your shoes long gone. It had been a long night but one that was going to be in your memory for years to come...hopefully.</p>
<p>The doors to the ballroom opened for you and you rushed inside, trying to find him. You realized in that hallway that no one will ever be able to make you feel the way he did, no one would so fiercely protect you or love you as he did. He was your soulmate.</p>
<p>“<b>Kylo</b>!” You screamed into the room, the music stopping at your screech and everyone turning to face you. You saw him standing at the base of the stairs, his knights around him. His face was sullen and you felt a rush of guilt run over you knowing that you were the cause of his pain.</p>
<p>He made eye contact with you and his eyebrows rose in surprise, the knights doing the same. You wasted no time though, hiking up your skirt and sprinting over to the man who loved you. As soon as you were close enough you launched yourself at him, knowing he would catch you no matter what.</p>
<p>And he did, he always would. It was definitely a struggle and it ended up with you both falling down onto the stairs but it didn’t matter...he had caught you.</p>
<p>“What are you doing?” He asked, frowning. “I set you free.”</p>
<p>“True love has a habit of coming back.” You confessed, smiling brightly before lowering your head to kiss him. He easily rose to meet you and cradled your head. You could <i>feel</i> his emotions pouring into you.</p>
<p>The crowd around you cheered and it made you pull away, looking around as even the knights were clapping. You turned to look back at him and he was grinning, actually grinning, before pulling you back down to kiss you again. </p>
<p>“I love you.” You whispered to him.</p>
<p>“I know.” Kylo replied cheekily, standing you both back up and twirling you around before bringing you back into his arms.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Of Gods and Monsters</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I am SO SO sorry it has taken me so long to update! I promise I haven't forgotten about you guys! I just moved to a new state and life has been hectic but I am back and better than ever!</p>
<p>This story is a Hades/Persephone AU!! Hades is Kylo and you, the reader, are Persephone! This chapter does contain smut but it is more towards the end so you can skip over it if you'd like! I hope you enjoy &lt;3</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It was a warm spring day. The flowers were now blooming, the sun was warming the earth, and you were spending the day with your mother, Demeter, tending to the many gardens that wrapped around your home. </p>
<p>You loved working with your mother, she hadn’t left your side since you were born and you wouldn’t have it any other way. She made sure you were safe, fed, educated...you couldn’t imagine a better life than what you had at the moment.</p>
<p>“Y/N, are you alright? You’re daydreaming again.” Demeter observed, basket resting on the side of her hip. “You aren’t ill, are you?”</p>
<p>“No, mama. I’m fine!” You smiled, raising on your toes to plant a kiss on her cheek as you walked past her. </p>
<p>Demeter smiled fondly at your action, her eyes holding a tenderness that only a mother could understand. You truly were special to her and she was forever thankful that Zeus had blessed her with you. You were the epitome of what a daughter should be; obedient, kind, graceful. She wouldn’t know what she would do if she were to lose you. </p>
<p>You continued to wander around until the sun started to fall behind the mountains, a small chill seeming to coil around your body and send a shiver down your spine. It was going to be dark soon but you still had one more chore to finish.</p>
<p>“Y/N come inside, it’s time for supper.” Your mother called, the servants bustling around her as she watched you look towards the tree line. </p>
<p>“I forgot to check the traps by the river, mama! I have to go make sure no one has gotten caught!” You shouted, already on your way to the forest. “I promise I will be right back!”</p>
<p>Demeter felt a small twist in her gut but she decided to ignore it, knowing her daughter was safe in the forest. <i>I’m just being silly, nothing in the forest will harm her.</i> </p>
<p>“Just hurry back please, I don’t want you to catch a cold!”</p>
<p>You shook your head and laughed, rolling your eyes at your mother’s overprotectiveness. Sometimes she could be a little much but you didn’t hold it against her, offering her a wide grin before quickening your pace. </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>By the time you had made it to the water’s edge the sun had officially disappeared, Selene’s carriage charging across the sky like a comet. You waved at her even though you knew she couldn’t see you, your eyes widening in awe as the heavens came into view.</p>
<p>“This beauty will never cease to amaze me…” You whispered to yourself, taking in the giant sky before the sound of a twig snapping caught your attention. </p>
<p>“Hello?” You hesitated, squinting to see in the darkness. The silence was your only response. Something about it was making the skin on the back of your neck prickle and you decided to hurry up and get back to your home.</p>
<p>You made quick work of checking the traps that some of the mortals would lay out to capture nymphs and other kinds of creatures. It didn’t make sense to you why someone would want to capture someone like that, to take them away from their home just because they are curious or find them beautiful.</p>
<p>Luckily you found no one and it seemed that none of the traps had even been set off, your anxiety easing as you used the moonlight to guide you back to the stones that would lead you home.</p>
<p>As you walked back you felt your foot snag on something, making you stop. You bent down, thinking it was just an uprooted tree root, but felt dread pour over you like ice water when a net quickly lifted you into the air.</p>
<p>A scream escaped you as you struggled blindly against the rope prison, feeling the branch groan and sway as you fought to escape. It was coarse against your skin and was leaving small scrapes, tears welling up in your eyes as you heard footsteps approaching you.</p>
<p>
  <i>They were waiting for me….how did I miss them? How do I get out?</i>
</p>
<p>You felt your heart racing as your efforts became more rushed, trying to break the bonds that held you. A part of you wanted to call out to your mother but you knew she wouldn’t hear you, you had to get out of this yourself.</p>
<p>A cold wind blew and the smell of moss and embers tickled your nose, making you halt your movement. <i>What is that?</i></p>
<p>“Do you need help?” A deep voice mused behind you, making you jump and twist to face whoever it was. </p>
<p>The voice belonged to a man, a man who exuded power and intensity. He was taller than her with raven hair that touched his shoulders and eyes that were the color of the earth but held a depth to them like the sea. His face was long and handsome, his lips a cupid’s bow. You were awestruck.</p>
<p>“Are you mute?” He waved his hand in front of your face, your eyes blinking rapidly as you came back to reality.  </p>
<p>“N-No.” You replied shakily, looking behind to make sure there was no one else trying to sneak from the shadows. “Please let me go, I can pay you.” You pleaded, lower lip quivering as the man chuckled.</p>
<p>“You think I trapped you?” He asked, walking around you slowly. </p>
<p>“I just assumed…” You trailed off, watching him with great caution. While he was beautiful you could tell he was dangerous, warning bells ringing in the back of your mind. “Can you please help me?”</p>
<p>He finally stopped in front of you and slowly trailed his eyes down your body which made you wrap your arms around yourself, suddenly feeling naked. You no longer were enchanted by him...you were terrified. </p>
<p>There was a tense silence between the two of you before you made eye contact once more. He must have seen how scared you were because his expression softened, he almost looked apologetic. </p>
<p>“One moment.” He mumbled before he raised his arms to cut the rope. You felt your stomach lurch as gravity suddenly pulled you down, your eyes squeezed shut as you braced for the fall.</p>
<p>Instead of the hard ground though you felt two arms easily circle your waist and legs, the strange smell from before becoming much stronger. You opened your eyes to see him staring at you in concern, his lips parted in a silent breath.</p>
<p>You felt your eyes search his face for a moment though you did not know what you were looking for, feeling his arms tighten under you for a brief moment before he gently placed you back on the ground.</p>
<p>“Thank you.” You murmured, smoothing out your dress. “What is your name?”</p>
<p>He opened his mouth to respond before the sound of your mother made you both jump, your hand coming up to rest against your chest.</p>
<p>“Y/N? Y/N! Where are you?” She cried, lantern poking through the dense bushes as she made her way closer and closer to the river. You nearly tripped over yourself as you ran towards the familiar voice, yelling for her.</p>
<p>“I’m here mama! I’m here!” You yelled, the bottom of your dress getting wet as you haphazardly crossed the river, letting out a small sob as you felt your mother’s arms wrap around you. </p>
<p>“Oh my child, what happened? Why didn’t you come home?” She shushed you, placing the light on the forest floor and stroking your hair with soft fingers. You buried yourself in her chest, holding onto her tightly. </p>
<p>“I got caught in a trap and-” You began before you shot back up, turning to look across the river for the man who had rescued you. You scanned the area but saw no one, your shoulders falling.</p>
<p>
  <i>I didn’t even get to thank him…</i>
</p>
<p>“What are you looking for?” Demeter pressed, cupping your face and making you look back at her. You felt guilt rise in your throat as you saw how worried she was, kicking yourself that you had strayed too far.</p>
<p>“No one…” You whispered more to yourself than to your mother. It wasn’t a complete lie because you didn’t know who had rescued you. </p>
<p>Demeter looked out towards the dark forest one more time before picking the lantern up and guiding you back towards your home, letting her nerves calm back down now that she knew you were safe. </p>
<p>You made sure to keep your arms tight against your body to hide the scars from the rope.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>A few weeks had passed after your incident in the woods and you were grateful that your mother had no longer sent you to check the traps. You didn’t know if this was because she was afraid you would get lost again or if she could feel that someone had been there with you but you didn’t want to question it, a chill running down your spine whenever you would look towards the trees. </p>
<p>With that chore now being delegated to someone else, you now had more time to spend with your friends. Your mother kept you from wandering out into the world, for your protection of course, so it was hard to make friends. But you didn’t let that deter you.</p>
<p>The nymphs that lived near your house were always inviting and kind. They made sure to ask you to join their dances, bring you treats, and make sure you were able to do more than just harvest, plant, and study. It was so refreshing to be seen as your own person and not a china doll.</p>
<p>“Y/N, come join us!” Malilia sang, looping her slender arm through your own to drag you to a nearby lake. “We’re all going for a swim!”</p>
<p>“A swim?” You asked excitedly, grinning from ear to ear. Malilia nodded as the tall grass tickled both of your legs. You glanced back to wave to your mother but didn’t see her anywhere. <i>Oh well.</i></p>
<p>“It’s been so long since we’ve been able to see you, flower.” Your friend said softly, her lower lip jutting out in a pout. “We missed you.”</p>
<p>You offered her an apologetic smile, your shoulders falling with a loud sigh. “I’m sorry, Malilia. Mama has been keeping me away and I’ve got so many things to do…”</p>
<p>Malilia held her hand up to silence you, stopping at the edge of the trees to turn you to face her. “Don’t worry, I shouldn’t have said anything. We know how busy you are and it wasn’t fair.” She confessed, brushing off a stray speck of dust from your dress. “All that matters is that you are here now and we are going to have fun!”</p>
<p>She brought you into a hug that you graciously accepted, squeezing her tight, before the sound of giggling echoed across the sky. Malilia smiled brightly and grasped your hand, the two of you taking off into the woods and running until splashing water could be heard.</p>
<p>When the lake came into view you saw your friends frolicking about in the water and at the water’s edge, their laughter filling your heart up with joy. One of them, Ornia, spotted you and all but shrieked your name. </p>
<p>“Y/N, Y/N, Y/N!!!” She cheered, sprinting up to you and spinning you around. </p>
<p>“Ornia! I missed you!” You exclaimed, trying to keep your vision straight after she put you down. </p>
<p>“And I, you! Come join us!” Ornia pleaded, barely waiting for you to strip down before tugging you into the water. It was slightly chilly but you welcomed the feeling, diving underneath to get completely soaked before coming back up for air.</p>
<p>
  <i>I needed this.</i>
</p>
<p>The sun was slowly sliding across the sky as you wasted the day away with your friends, your sisters. You played games, told stories of your captor, and just enjoyed the feeling of being free. It was the perfect day. </p>
<p>Or, it was.</p>
<p>“There’s a God in the forest!” Neda shrieked to everyone, shoving her dress back on while her eyes stayed trained on the bushes. “We need to go find Demeter!”</p>
<p>They all started to run around and gather their things, the fear very evident in their eyes. It was no shock though, Gods were notorious for chasing around nymphs and bedding them without their consent. You didn’t want them to go get your mother though, you knew that if she found out that she would <i>never</i> let you go out by yourself again. </p>
<p>“Stop.” You commanded them, your tone holding an edge to it that was rarely ever heard. The girls all halted mid-step, looking at you in confusion. </p>
<p>“Why? We need to leave, Y/N. Come on!” Ornia whispered harshly, her fingers tight on your upper arm. “This is no time for curiosity.”</p>
<p>“I’ll go talk to him.” You stated calmly, slowly removing her hand. “Mama doesn’t need to find out or I’ll never be allowed to come back.”  </p>
<p>“Y/N no,” Ornia argued. “You don’t know what you are doing.”</p>
<p>You turned to look at your friend, giving her a pleading look. You certainly weren’t asking for permission but you hoped that she could at least understand why you didn’t want them to fetch your mother. Besides, it was just a God. You hadn’t met many but when they realized you were Demeter’s daughter they usually high-tailed it out of the area, not wanting to face the wrath of your mother.</p>
<p>“Please, Ornia, I can do this.” You maintained, stepping away from her. Ornia bowed her head and nodded, knowing she could not talk you out of it, before gathering the girls to a nearby meadow. </p>
<p>“We’ll be over there if you need us. Just scream and we’ll fetch Demeter.”</p>
<p>You nodded and walked further into the woods, feeling the stares of the group burning into your back. You felt a sense of déjà vu as you heard the sound of heavy footsteps beside you.</p>
<p>After looking around and not seeing anyone, you tensed. You had no idea who this God was and all of the courage that you had had before was quickly draining away. It was becoming apparent to you just how naive you were to the world.</p>
<p>“Who’s there?” You called out, cursing the shakiness of your voice. “This is sacred ground and I demand you show yourself.”</p>
<p>“You demand, huh?” A husky voice chuckled, making you whip around to find the source. Your breath was quickly taken away when you realized that it was the man who had rescued you, your savior. </p>
<p>He looked the same, though in the sunlight you noticed just how pale he was. This only seemed to enhance his beauty, making you feel as if you were just struck with one of Cupid’s bows.</p>
<p>“I-” You stammered, eyebrows furrowing as you realized just how messy you probably looked. Here he was in ornate robes and you were in a wet dress that clung to your figure. You self consciously wrapped your arms around your upper body. </p>
<p>“You?” He teased, his dark eyes slowly drinking in your shivering body. You felt a heat stir in your lower belly.</p>
<p>“Who are you? Neda said you were a God...why didn’t you tell me that night?” You queried, eyeing him warily as he made a slow circle around you.</p>
<p>Something about him excited you in ways that no one ever had. Perhaps it was the fact that he was dark and mysterious, like how some of your favorite books described the prince. Or it could be the way he stared at you as if the entire universe was centered around you. </p>
<p>One would almost describe it as fate tugging your heart towards him though you still did not know his name.</p>
<p>“It never came up.” He responded, holding out his hand to motion you to come closer towards him...towards the shadows. </p>
<p>“Please, tell me your name.” </p>
<p>“I can’t.”</p>
<p>“Why not?”</p>
<p>“Because you would run.”</p>
<p>As soon as he said this you probably should have run, even if he were joking with you. However, you noticed that his lips were tilted in a smirk, his eyes held a sadness that led you to believe that it was not a joke. The sorrow made your heart clench.</p>
<p>“I could never run from my rescuer. I can tell you my name if it helps.” You offered, dropping your arms to rest by your side. “My name is Y/N.” </p>
<p>The man stared at you with a strange look on his features, as if he couldn’t believe you were still talking to him. You assumed that not many people talked to him which probably meant he was a God that people feared...or hated.</p>
<p>You couldn’t see anyone hating him, though. He hadn’t done anything to hurt you or take advantage of you when he very easily could have. There were plenty of people who would have just left you there to wallow but he didn’t.</p>
<p>“This is the part where you give your name.” You whispered with a coy smile on your face, cupping your hands over your mouth like a child would share a secret. </p>
<p>He took a deep breath before he stepped into the sunlight with you, the first time you truly got to see just how <i>tall</i> he was, and finally gave in to your demand.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“My name is Hades.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>The name struck a chord in you that it would in any other person...fear. Hades was an Olympian, part of the Big Three, and ruler of the Underworld. He was known as a cruel, heartless man who stayed locked away from the rest of the world. This man was dangerous.</p>
<p>And yet...as fast as the fear appeared it vanished. Every instinct in your body should have had you screaming and running as far away as possible but you were still standing there, staring into his eyes.</p>
<p>Hades’s scent of moss and embers wafted through your nose and you took a deep breath, closing your eyes for a brief moment before opening them back up to look at him. He looked uneasy as if he were waiting for you to freak out. </p>
<p>“Hello Hades, it’s nice to meet you.” You breathed, giving him a shy smile. “Thank you for saving me.”</p>
<p>“You’re supposed to be running.” He murmured under his breath, his tone slightly amazed. You felt your heart do tiny flips, the urge to reach out and hold his face getting harder to ignore. </p>
<p>“Never.” You confessed, returning the smile that was slowly creeping onto his face. You had no idea how long you two stayed there, trapped in your own world, but it didn’t matter to you. Zeus himself could have come down from Olympus but it wouldn’t have been enough to drag you away from the enigma standing before you.</p>
<p>When a cold breeze blew past you though, you realized you were still standing there in a soaking wet dress. You felt goosebumps rise on your arms and legs, your nipples perking up through the thin material. However you were quick to cover <i>that</i>.</p>
<p>Hades seemed to notice your discomfort because he stepped away from you, breaking the trance. “You should go home, you’ll get sick out here.” He reasoned, a dense fog gathering behind him. </p>
<p>You nodded and went to turn away before your eyes grew wide, reaching out to grab his arm to stop him. The touch sent a shock through your arm and you could have sworn you saw his mouth twitch at the contact. </p>
<p>“Wait! Will you come see me again?” You asked, bottom lip drawn between your teeth. </p>
<p>Hades seemed amazed that you would even want to see him again, his eyebrows furrowing for a second before it went back to its stoic look. “You want to see me again?”</p>
<p>You answered his question with an enthusiastic nod and wide grin, letting go of him when he glanced down at your hand. “Of course, silly! Can you meet me in the meadow by the lake in two days? I’ll bring some of my favorite treats and a book and-”</p>
<p>He held up his hand to stop you, a low chuckle coming from his chest that made your cheeks light up in soft pink. “You don’t have to do this, Y/N. I’m not going to make you settle a debt with me for saving you.”</p>
<p>You frowned at his comment and looked at the ground, chewing on the inside of your cheek. <i>He thinks I only want to see him because of duty...not friendship. </i></p>
<p>
  <i>I wonder how many people treat him like that?</i>
</p>
<p>A newfound sense of determination courses through your veins and you let out a huff, straightening your spine. “I’m not doing this because I think I owe you. I’m doing this because I enjoy your company….and you look like you could use a friend.”</p>
<p>Hades looked taken aback by your comment. He stared hard into your eyes, searching for something. You assumed he found what he was looking for because his body relaxed, holding up his hands in false surrender.</p>
<p>“My apologies, Y/N. I will never make the mistake of questioning you again.” He quipped, giving you a sly wink. You rolled your eyes before pointing towards the meadow, tilting your head to make sure he got the message.</p>
<p>He let out a laugh, a true laugh that made your stomach flutter and your ears heat up. “I’ll be there, little goddess. Don’t worry.”</p>
<p>You immediately flushed scarlet at his pet name and quickly began walking back to where your friends were waiting for you, calling out a shrill goodbye that made you wince. Hades’s chuckle followed you back home and into your dreams, the smell of moss and embers caressing you into one of the best slumbers of your life.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“That’s clearly a dog.” You argued while taking another bite of your food, the pillow resting under your head providing a nice comfort to the hard earth underneath the blanket.</p>
<p>“Y/N, I am much older than you and I can promise you that that is <i>not</i> a dog.” Hades countered, his arms behind his head as they both stared up at the stars.</p>
<p>It had been almost two months since you had met Hades and your relationship had only grown. You two met with each other at least once a week, if not more, and would talk for hours and hours. </p>
<p>Sometimes the conversations were about the secrets of the universe and other philosophical questions while at other times it was about who would beat who in a fight. </p>
<p>That was one of the things you had loved most about Hades, how easy it was to talk to him. You didn’t see the cold-hearted God that everyone seemed to paint him as. He was soft and caring, he listened to you complain and offered you advice. He sometimes would try to braid your hair or read you a book. </p>
<p>Hades was so much more than God of the Underworld and it pained you that no one had thought to try to see past that. </p>
<p>It goes without saying that Hades also enjoyed your company very much. He had never traveled to the surface this much but he made the time for you. You who made his fingers tremble and stomach twist, the Goddess that took his breath away with a single look.</p>
<p>You were both in too deep but neither of you wanted to admit it to the other. Both of you had your fears, your own worries of how the other would react that made you keep the secret locked deep inside. </p>
<p>“No, look!” You stressed, grabbing his hand and slowly pointing out the cluster of stars that were clearly in the shape of a dog. “It’s right there! Maybe your old man vision is preventing you from seeing it.” You taunted, giving him a sly look out of the corner of your eye. </p>
<p>Hades, of course, took the bait and raised up on his elbows to stare down at you. “Are you mocking me, little goddess?” He uttered in a hushed tone, brown eyes gazing into your own with a fondness that you had only dreamed of before.</p>
<p>“Perhaps.” Was your reply, twisting your body so that you were fully facing him now. He looked beautiful at any time of the day but here, surrounded by the starlight, Hades looked ethereal. </p>
<p>All of the times you two had spent together came rushing into your mind. When you sat in the meadow and made him a flower crown, how he had brought some of his favorite poems and read them to you while you laid across his lap, the longing stares and soft brushes of shoulders that seemed to be happening more frequently.</p>
<p>You knew you were in too far, that a special place had been carved into your soul for Hades. But was that so bad? Was it terrible that you had fallen for the ruler of the dead? Some people would say so...but those were also the people who didn’t truly <i>know</i> him. </p>
<p>They didn’t know Aidoneus, know his story, or how broken he was on the inside. When he shared with you his story, the real story, you had wept for a week. You couldn’t imagine the pain and sadness that he went through. </p>
<p>A comet streaked across the sky behind his head that caught your attention, eyes following it until it fizzled out. When you looked back at him you realized that he hadn’t looked away.</p>
<p>“You missed the comet.” You said, feeling heat climb the back of your neck at his stare.</p>
<p>“I’m looking at something much more important.” He murmured, bending down until your noses were brushing against each other. You drew in a small breath at his action, your heart hammering against your chest. <i>He’s going to kiss me.</i></p>
<p>Hades hand lifted up and softly cupped your jaw as if you were made of glass. He ran his thumb across your cheekbone, feeling the heat coming off of your body. You swallowed loudly and parted your lips, gazing at him through your lashes.</p>
<p>“May I kiss you, Y/N?” He purred, his hazel eyes flickering between your lips and your gaze. </p>
<p>“Yes, Aidoneus.” You murmured, tilting your head up to meet him halfway.</p>
<p>When your lips touched it felt as if time had stopped. You couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe, but you could <i>feel</i>. You could feel his love, his adoration, everything he thought of you was poured into this kiss.</p>
<p>He tasted of bourbon, fire, and <i>sin</i>. His other hand came up to cup the back of your neck, deepening the kiss which earned a small moan that you didn’t even know you could make. Your hands came up to grip the front of his robe as he slowly laid you down on the soft blanket, breaking the kiss to stare at you.</p>
<p>You tried to catch your breath, not knowing that such a simple action could make you feel like this. For a moment it was just the sound of your combined breaths, the cold air making them appear in small clouds, before the both of you moved back towards each other at the same time.</p>
<p>It was as if you were magnets being pulled together. When your lips met again it was much more demanding, more hungry. His tongue swiped against your lower lip and you gladly opened your mouth to him, enjoying the rumbling in his chest when you submitted to him so easily.</p>
<p>“I’ve wanted to do this for so long…” He grunted, his lips moving away from your own to trail down the side of your neck. You threw your head back to allow him better access, your fingers sliding through his raven locks.</p>
<p>“You are so beautiful, my goddess. You are like my own personal siren call, you’ve lured me in and I want to drown in you.” Hades breathed against your neck, giving a small suck at your pulse point that had you arching into him.</p>
<p>You had never experienced anything like this, your body had never felt this excited yet agitated. It was as if his touch was everything and nothing, your mouth failing to form words to convey your frustration. </p>
<p>It was as if your body was dancing with flames of Hell and in a way it was, but in the most exquisite way possible. His words had you becoming putty in his hands, melting into his form while he continued to lavish you in kisses and praise. </p>
<p>Hades' mouth glided to your ear and gently tugged it with his teeth, drinking in every sound and shudder that escaped your body. “You are the definition of divine, my own Pandora’s box…” </p>
<p>You felt one of his hands leave your face and land on your thigh, his calloused fingers slowly trailing up and hiking up your robes inch by inch. You knew this was going too fast, that you had no idea what you were doing, and that if this progressed any further it could end in catastrophe. However, you couldn’t find it in you to care.</p>
<p>“Please…” You whined, staring into his heated gaze with a pleading look. You didn’t know what you were begging for but you knew you needed it <i>now</i>.</p>
<p>“Please what, ἄνθος?” He prodded, his fingers digging slightly into your flesh. “What do you want?”</p>
<p>“You.” You professed, watching his pupils dilate much like a predator would when they saw its prey.</p>
<p>Instead of answering you felt him suddenly stand, wrapping his arm around your waist and bringing him up with you. You gripped onto his shoulders to maintain your balance, confusion etching across your face as you gazed up at him.</p>
<p>“What are you doing?” </p>
<p>He looked down at you with a gleam in his eyes, his lips curling in a primal grin that made your thighs clench. </p>
<p>“Taking you home.”</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>The ground suddenly opened up beneath you and you let out a small shriek, squeezing your eyes shut as your stomach rose up when you felt yourself fall. Hades held onto you tightly and within seconds, you felt the ground return.</p>
<p>You slowly opened your eyes and realized that you were in Hades’s bedroom, the gigantic bed with blood-red sheets being the obvious giveaway. The room was dark but cozy, a fireplace off to the side while a bookshelf was on the other. The bed had one of the most comfortable looking blankets you had ever seen draped across it, making you want to curl into it and just forget everything around you.</p>
<p>“Do you like it?” Hades asked you, watching you take it all in. You knew him well enough to tell that he was nervous you weren’t going to like it.</p>
<p>“It’s lovely.” You whispered, leaving his side to walk over and run your hands over the soft fur of the blanket. It was hypnotic, the way it felt between your fingers. “This is my favorite part.”</p>
<p>Hades came up behind you and brushed your hair over your shoulder, his fingers leaving a trail of goosebumps in his wake. Your eyes closed involuntarily at the feeling, face turning to the side to brush your cheek against his nose. You felt the soft smile against your skin.</p>
<p>“Are you sure about this, Y/N? We don’t have to do anything tonight…” He said in a somber tone, trailing his digits up the side of your body. “I would be perfectly happy to just lay here with you.”</p>
<p>You turned around to press the front of your body against his, surprising both of you with your boldness. It was no secret that this was a big step, one that probably should have been discussed beforehand, but you didn’t want to wait. Something that felt this good couldn’t be wrong. </p>
<p>There was no doubt in your mind that you wanted Hades to be your first. Sure you were still young, significantly younger than him, but something about his soul called out to yours. It was like they were made for each other. You could care less what your mother would say, what the other Gods would think, none of that mattered to you anymore.</p>
<p>Aidoneus was the only one of importance. </p>
<p>“I want it to be you, Aidoneus. I cannot explain this feeling to you, this yearning, but I would imagine it is what the flowers feel without the sun, the moon without the stars.” You murmured, raising your hand to gently stroke his cheek. He immediately melted into your touch, covering your hand with his own. “I love you.”</p>
<p>Hades stared at you with a devotion not even Hera could claim she had seen before. You were his morning and night, his beginning and ending, his past and future. Everything became clear when you were with him.</p>
<p>“I love you too, my little goddess.” He proclaimed, bringing your hand to rest over his heart. “This belongs to you and you alone. You have bewitched me and I will forever be yours, Y/N.” </p>
<p>You let out a shuddering breath before raising up on your tiptoes to capture his lips with your own. You put everything you had into this kiss, all of the emotions you were feeling, and you could have sworn you felt a tear hit your cheek. </p>
<p>Before you could pull back to check he had gently pushed you onto the bed, easily taking the lead. You felt him ask for entrance into your mouth and you gladly let him, tasting him on your tongue. </p>
<p>Hades hands captured the sleeves of your dress and slowly began to pull them down while you were still occupied. When he reached the top of your breasts he pulled away from you, his hands slightly trembling. </p>
<p>“Can I?”</p>
<p>“<i>Please</i>.” You ushered, watching with rapt attention as bit by bit, you were exposed to him. He stopped once he got your stomach, eyes transfixed on your breasts. Your nipples pebbled quickly due to being exposed and you fought the urge to cover yourself.</p>
<p>“Are they...okay?” You asked, your tone full of uncertainty. Hades looked up for a brief moment and you saw his eyes full of adoration. </p>
<p>“You’re exquisite.” He purred, the tip of his index finger grazing over your left nipple. “Beautiful, majestic, otherworldly…” He complimented, slowly lowering his head until his mouth was hovering just above your breast.</p>
<p>“But most importantly...mine.” He growled before taking your breast into his mouth, lavishing his tongue across the hard pebble which had you arching off of the bed and letting out a loud moan. </p>
<p>
  <i>I never knew I could feel like this…. </i>
</p>
<p>You shut your eyes and relished in the feeling of his hot mouth around your tit, fingers fisting into his hair and giving a gentle tug. Hades let out a small moan at the action and it went straight down to your sex. </p>
<p>“Ahhh!” You cried when his other hand came up to pinch your other nipple, making sure to pay it attention as well. </p>
<p>“That’s it, my flower. Sing for me.” He whispered as your cries grew louder, his teeth pulling your nipple taut.</p>
<p>You felt your thighs become sticky, the smell of sex permeating the air which made your head spin. He was playing your body like it was his favorite song, knowing exactly which chords to strum. </p>
<p>When he switched to the other breast you also realized he had shimmied your dress off the rest of the way, your pussy on full display for him. He began to slowly kiss down your stomach while maintaining eye contact with you, his eyes positively wicked.</p>
<p>You raised yourself up on your elbows as he went lower until he was face to face with your petals. He was gazing at it like a parched man would look at an ocean, as if it were his last meal on Earth. Hades ran one finger down your slit, collecting the juices that glistened in the firelight.</p>
<p>“Gods, Y/N. You’re soaked.” He groaned, bringing the finger to his mouth and making a show out of licking it. Your eyes widen to an impossible size, not realizing that was something that he would do. However, his look of pleasure halted you from voicing your concern, his eyelids fluttering shut at the taste of your sex.</p>
<p>“I knew you would taste divine.”</p>
<p>The blush that covered your face was scarlet as you watched him come closer once again, only this time he used his tongue instead of his finger. Your thighs immediately tried to close at the foreign feeling but Hades easily grabbed them and held them open for you, flicking his sinfully long tongue across your pearl.</p>
<p>“Fuck, Aidoneus!” You gasped, hand flying to grasp at his hair once more. “M-More, please.” </p>
<p>“As my goddess commands.” He chuckled before working his tongue all around your pussy, your hips rocking involuntarily to try and gain more friction. There was nothing in the world that could compare to the pleasure he was giving to you right now.</p>
<p>His tongue dipped down and teased your opening, going in slightly and then retreating. Your free hand came up to grasp at your breast, fingers twisting your nipple just like he had done earlier. </p>
<p>Hades continued to work at your entrance, occasionally coming up to suck on your clit before diving back down again. When you felt his finger circle around your hole you felt your heart flutter, tugging his raven locks harshly. </p>
<p>“Take a deep breath, flower.” Hades warned you before very gently pushing his finger inside of you. You immediately tensed up at the feeling, a small pinch making you wince. He kept working your clit with his tongue as he waited for you to relax.</p>
<p>When you wiggled slightly to test the pain you realized it had faded as soon as it appeared. You gave him a small nod to let him know you were okay and you felt him withdraw his finger only to push it back in.</p>
<p>“Oooh…” You keened, a sense of euphoria washing over your body that sent tingles down to your toes. <i>That feels amazing.</i></p>
<p>Hades continued the slow pace while coming up to you to kiss you once more, your wetness coating his chin. You tasted yourself on his mouth and felt something <i>large</i> grazing your thigh. He must have felt it as well because he gave a short thrust of his hips into you, driving it further up your leg.</p>
<p>Your hand reached down curiously and gently touched his cock, hearing the choked breath that escaped his mouth. You realized he was still in his robes, the material keeping you from seeing his full length, but you could tell it was enormous.</p>
<p>Just as you wrapped your hand around it as best you could, he crooked his finger inside of your walls. You felt your insides flutter and saw stars in your vision as he hit a seemingly special spot inside you, finding yourself choking on air now. He let out a throaty chuckle and repeated the action, his lips finding the shell of your ear.</p>
<p>“Does that feel good, Y/N?” He asked, slightly picking up the speed. Your fingers tightened on his cock at the change of speed but that only spurred him on, watching your every move as he fucked you with his hand.</p>
<p>“Y-yes...it f-feels amazing…” You moaned, a warmth growing in your belly that was sending all sorts of pleasure across your body, You felt <i>something</i> building inside of you and it felt as if you were going to burst, his finger rubbing that special spot once more.</p>
<p>“Fuck, I can feel you tightening around me.” Hades grunted, grabbing your chin to make you look up at him. Your hand dropped from his cock and fisted at the sheets, your mouth forming a small o.</p>
<p>“P-Please...I, I-” You begged though you didn’t know what you were begging for. Hades knew though, his thumb coming up to rub small circles on your clit. </p>
<p>“Let go, Y/N. Cum.” He urged, watching your eyes grow heavy and body tense tightly before it suddenly went limp.</p>
<p>You felt the pressure building and building until it had nowhere else to go, your pleasure hitting a crescendo that had you seeing stars. Your pussy gushed and throbbed around his finger while a silent scream tried to escape your throat, not able to look away from his heated gaze. </p>
<p>Hades caught you before you fell, whispering praises into your ear as he moved you farther up the bed. He knew it was your first orgasm and although he was incredibly pent up, he knew how overwhelming it could be.</p>
<p>It felt as if you were floating through space, Hades words sounding distant until you were slowly brought back to the present. You turned to look at him and gave him a shy smile, still trying to come back down.</p>
<p>“You did so well, Y/N.” He muttered while peppering kisses across your face. “So, so well.”</p>
<p>You grinned and tried to sit up by yourself, your eyes looking down to notice that he was still hard. “You didn’t…” You trailed off, gesturing towards his lower half. Hades looked sheepish as he tucked a piece of your hair behind your ear, shushing you.</p>
<p>“We don’t have to do that tonight, my flower. You’ve done a lot today.”</p>
<p>But you stopped him mid-sentence by placing your hand on his thigh, biting your lower lip and looking up at him through your lashes. “I want to.” You stated, your body easily bouncing back from the best (and only) orgasm of your life. “I want to make you feel good.”</p>
<p>Hades looked lost for a moment before he nodded, standing up to disrobe. You watched with undivided attention, his stomach and trail of hair begging to be caressed. When his robe hit the floor and he stood there in all of his glory, you felt your mouth water.</p>
<p>You had seen pictures of them, every woman had. But even without seeing any in real life, you <i>knew</i> he was larger than average. It was slightly curved and had a bead of cum at the tip, the base of it swelled up which gave it a nice girth. </p>
<p>“Beautiful.” You murmured, taking in his completely naked form. And it was true, Hades was the most handsome man you had ever seen. No one could compare to <i>your</i> God and you wanted to make sure he knew that. </p>
<p>You scooted to the edge of the bed and sat on your knees, splaying your hand across his chest. “Aidoneus, you are so gorgeous.” You said before you began to kiss down his chest just as he had done to you. <i>He won’t mind that I’m taking this from his playbook, right?</i></p>
<p>Hades hands came to rest atop your head, his Adam's apple bobbing as he swallowed thickly. Your kisses were like fire on his body but it burned in the best way, a whine almost escaping him when you stopped at his cock.</p>
<p>You stared at it for a moment and tried to figure out the best way to approach it. It wouldn’t be a lie to say it was intimidating and you didn’t want to choke on it. You decided to take a deep breath and just go with what felt right, not wanting to overthink it.</p>
<p>A gentle kiss was laid on the head of his cock which made it jump, startling you slightly. He immediately started to apologize but moaned instead when your tongue licked along the side of it. </p>
<p>Hades had gotten blow jobs before, he was a God, but none of them felt as good as this one...and you had barely touched him. “You’re going to be the death of me, flower.” He muttered under his breath, gaze hot and heavy as you continued to give small licks across his shaft.</p>
<p>You let out a huff of air at his comment before going back to the task at hand. You remember your friends telling you of their sexual escapades and you were trying to remember what they did.</p>
<p>Nothing was coming up and you felt discouraged until a lightbulb suddenly went off in your head, Ornia’s words flashing in bright letters. </p>
<p>
  <i>“I think he really enjoyed it when it touched the back of my throat.”</i>
</p>
<p>You gave your lover a sly wink before you brought the head of his cock to your mouth. You took a deep breath and then slowly brought him into your mouth, feeling his hands tighten painfully in your hair as you went as far as you could go.</p>
<p>“Ffffuck…” Hades gasped, back bending at the feel of your warm, wet mouth completely taking him in. He could’ve came right then if he hadn’t quickly reigned himself in, fighting the urge to shove you down further. “W-Where did you learn that?”</p>
<p>“Ormljis.” You tried to reply though it was garbled and incoherent. Your throat tightened around him when you tried to speak and it made him suck in a deep breath through his nose. </p>
<p>He knew he wouldn’t last long if you kept that up and gently tugged you off his cock, drool connecting the two of you before it broke away and dripped down your chin. You watched with furrowed eyebrows as he wiped it away with his thumb.</p>
<p>“Did I do something wrong?” You worried, bottom lip jutting out in worry that he was quick to soothe.</p>
<p>“No, no. Quite the contrary.” He chuckled, picking you up gingerly and sitting you on his lap while he rested his head on the soft pillows of the bed. “I didn’t want it to end like that.”</p>
<p>You flushed at his comment and realized what this meant, glancing down at his stomach. You knew you were ready, you wanted this, but it was still nerve-wracking. <i>What if it doesn’t fit? Or he realizes he doesn’t like me?</i></p>
<p>“What’s wrong, Y/N? Are you uncomfortable?” He pressed, cupping your small face into his hand. You welcomed the affection, nuzzling into him.</p>
<p>“No, I’m fine. I’m just….what if it hurts? Or I’m not good?” You faltered, refusing to meet his eyes. “People make this such a big deal and I’m worried that I won’t be any good.”</p>
<p>You felt him raise up and bring you in for a soft kiss, one that was made to comfort and soothe you. </p>
<p>“Look at me, Y/N.” He said, watching as your eyes slowly looked up. “You are perfect to me. You were made for me. I could never want for anything more than you, my precious flower. If you don’t want to do this I will not pressure you but know that you could never, ever, disappoint me.”</p>
<p>His words made you feel better, knowing that he truly meant what he said. You smiled and gave him a small peck before resting your forehead against his. “I want to...but can we go slow?”</p>
<p>Hades offered you a rare smile, one that you wanted to capture and keep locked away for only you to see, and nodded. “Of course, my little goddess.”</p>
<p>You scooted back slightly until you were able to grasp him in your hand, raising your hips so that you could position it above your entrance. <i>I can do this, I can do this. </i></p>
<p>Your foreheads found each other again and you leaned on him as you slowly sank onto his cock, your climax from earlier making it easier for him to slide in. However it did not make the pain completely go away, your walls stretching in ways they never had to accommodate his size. </p>
<p>“Breath, Y/N.” He reminded you though his voice was trembling, gripping onto your upper arms as your hands rested on either side of his head. He was lying down with you sitting on top, a position that gave him the best view of your conjoined bodies. You felt his head drop down to look and heard him groan at the sight.</p>
<p>Once you felt him hilt inside you, you let out the breath you didn’t realize you had been holding. It was uncomfortable but your body was slowly becoming used to it. You didn’t want to move yet though, content on watching his face contorted in pleasure.</p>
<p>“You’re so tight, flower.” He moaned, watching as your hair fell around your face in the most heavenly way. “Let me know when you’re ready.”</p>
<p>You waited a few more seconds until you were confident and then slowly lifted up your hips until just the tip of him was left. You heard him suck in a breath through his teeth, his hands flying to grasp onto your hips. His touch was gentle but also firm, his thumbs leaving imprints on your skin.</p>
<p>Hades looked into your eyes and you tossed your hair over your back, splaying one of your hands across his broad chest before sinking back down and taking him back in.</p>
<p>“Oh, shit…”</p>
<p>“Ahh….”</p>
<p>Both of your cries filled the air at the same time, the feeling of him filling you up quickly becoming addicting. He was helping you as you cautiously found your rhythm, his godlike strength allowing him to easily pick you up. </p>
<p>You bit your lower lip as you noticed that whenever you would lower your hips, he would thrust up to meet you. He was hitting deep inside you and it felt so good that it had to be unholy, your eyes rolling into the back of your head as your hips started moving on their own.</p>
<p>“Look at you flower, you’re taking my cock so wonderfully.” Hades encouraged you, one of his hands moving away from your hip to rub against your bud. The result was a crashing wave of pleasure that made you feel like the walls were crumbling around you.</p>
<p>“You feel so good, Aidoneus...please, please touch me.” You whimpered, the sound of your juices fueling the fire inside your belly as you fucked yourself on your lover. He was introducing you to a new world that you had never thought you would experience.</p>
<p>He sat up and pulled your naked body flush against his own, your nipples pushing into his chest as he started to increase the speed of his thrusts. You didn’t know how to react, your head falling into the crook of his neck as you struggled to catch your breath. </p>
<p>Hades felt as if he could ascend right now, the feeling of your pussy clenching around him taunting him dangerously close to the edge. You were something different, something untouched that brought out a feral side to him that made him want to claim you over and over again.</p>
<p>The sound of skin slapping together and your breathy moans were like music to his ears, your body bouncing against his as you tried your best to match his thrusts. You could feel the familiar coiling in your belly from earlier and used your remaining strength to pull your head back to stare up at him.</p>
<p>“I’m close!” You cried, eyebrows knitting together in pleasure as he slightly moved you which caused him to hit your spot that he had hit earlier. Your hands curled around his neck as you screamed at the sensation, feeling his cock throbbing inside of you. “Oh my gods….”</p>
<p>He gazed down at your eyes, your hair sticking to the side of your face due to the sweat and heat of the room. Hades had never seen someone look so sinful, so ripe for the taking. You were begging to be fucked into the afterlife.</p>
<p>“Cum with me, Y/N. Cum on my cock.” He commanded, raising his hips harshly so that he continued to drive into you. You knew in the back of your head that he was being rough and you would <i>definitely</i> be sore tomorrow but it didn’t matter, you were on another plane of existence at the moment. </p>
<p>You opened your mouth to scream as you felt your orgasm sweep over you but Hades leaned down to capture your cries, his grunts of pleasure reverberating in your mouth as you reached your peaks together. His hands dug into your sides painfully while yours found his hair, your lips molding together as you felt him coat the insides of your inner walls.</p>
<p>His thrusts continued for a little while longer, slowing down each time as both of you twitched and gasped at the tiny aftershocks. When he pulled away to check on you, it made his cock twitch inside you. You were still coming back down but the look on your face...he would remember it for the rest of his days. </p>
<p>“Wow…” You breathed, your arms going limp and falling to your sides. “That was...you were…” You tried to say, words failing to describe how it felt.</p>
<p>“My sentiments exactly.” Hades chuckled lowly, running his fingers tenderly down the side of your face before he looked down where you were still connected. “I’m going to pull out, okay?”</p>
<p>You nodded and only tensed slightly when he removed himself from your sex, a sort of sadness filling your heart when you realized how empty you felt. He slowly got out of bed before he walked over to your side, scooping you up in his arms and carrying you to a different room.</p>
<p>“Where are we going?” You asked, fighting the heaviness that was behind your eyes. </p>
<p>“To take a bath, flower. We need to clean you up.” Hades explained, walking into the dark room and fiddling with a knob until the sound of water echoed around the room. “Aftercare is very important.”</p>
<p>You smiled and nodded, resting your head against his chest as he lowered you both into the hot water. It felt amazing against the sore muscles that were starting to cry out. You kept your body curled up against him though, not wanting to leave him just yet.</p>
<p>The room was silent for awhile as he turned the water off and grabbed some soap, rubbing it in lazy circles across your exposed skin. You sighed contently and sprinkled tiny kisses across his collarbones, enjoying the scent of sex and embers. It was just the two of you in your own world, darkness surrounding you, but for the first time... you weren’t scared of it.</p>
<p>“Aidoneus?” You murmured into his chest, maneuvering around so that you were sitting in his lap once again and taking the soap from his large hands. He watched you carefully as you began to rub the soap into his skin. </p>
<p>“Hmm?” He queried, amber eyes full of tenderness and affection. </p>
<p>“Can I stay with you tonight?” You whispered softly, eyes downcast due to the fear of rejection. You knew you had just done <i>much</i> worse with him just a few minutes ago but this was more intimate. </p>
<p>Hades put two fingers under your chin and softly tilted it up so you would look at him. Your cheeks turned a beautiful shade of pink at his undivided attention, hand stopping its motion. </p>
<p>“I could never say no to you, Y/N.” He explained to you, sitting up which made the water slosh around the two of you. “You have my heart, my soul, my body, you have all of me. You will always have all of me, my flower.” </p>
<p>Your lips quirked up at the side and you moved to kiss him smoothly, reaching under the water to grab his hand and place it over your heart. He looked down and then back up at you, feeling your heartbeat underneath your soft skin.</p>
<p>“And I, you, Aidoneus.” You cooed, not missing the way his eyes shone in the low light of the bathroom. “For all eternity.”</p>
<p>A soft gasp flew out of your mouth when you felt him sit up quickly, dipping you slightly and kissing you once more. It was full of passion and love, like all of the others, but this one also held a promise. An unspoken one. </p>
<p>A promise that would echo across the skies, the heavens and earth….a promise that would be written about in history books and love songs. A promise of devotion, of love, of understanding.</p>
<p>A promise that the King of the Underworld gave to the Goddess of Spring.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Inner Demons</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>14,578 words. 50 pages. 1 hot priest. 1 hot demon. </p>
<p>I have worked on this for the past two days straight and I could not be more proud. I have never written something this long and I am so happy that I did. </p>
<p>I am probably going to hell for writing this but you guys are coming with me so, enjoy!</p>
<p>*THIS IS PURE, FILTHY SMUT. LIKE LITERALLY THE DIRTIEST SMUT*</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <i> <b>Y/N</b></i>
  
</p>
<p>As a child you went to church all of the time, being forced to wear frilly dresses by your overbearing mother and <strike>sleep</strike> listen to the sermon from Father Luke. The church didn’t have Sunday school like all of your other friends had so you were stuck sitting in the uncomfortable pew for two hours every Sunday and Wednesday, hating every minute of it.</p>
<p>When you were old enough to drive you <i>finally</i> got the choice to not go, skipping out to go smoke pot with your high school friends or other unspeakable sins that God would smite you for later. This was also the time when you stopped believing in religion entirely, hating the entire institution and the pain it brought to people. </p>
<p>You couldn’t understand how someone could claim love and understanding while also cursing every non-believer. It was almost like a cult in your eyes, the people on the inside completely brainwashed by its overwhelming power and control. </p>
<p>So you dropped it like a hot coal, casting it into the back of your mind to never touch again. </p>
<p>You can imagine the surprise of your parents when you walked back into the Three Kingdoms Church one cold Sunday morning, your friend standing behind you beaming.</p>
<p>“Y/N!” Your mother called, waving her hand to get you to come closer. You pushed down the urge to run and awkwardly walked through the rows of pews to see her. </p>
<p>“I can’t believe you’re here! And with Shelby! It’s so nice to see you dear!” Your mother cooed, bending across the bench to place two kisses on Shelby’s cheek. Shelby held onto her grin and returned her kisses, shooting you a warning look that clearly said <b>Be good.</b></p>
<p>“It’s nice to see you too! Y/N and I are so happy to be here! She was practically beside herself getting ready this morning.” Shelby chatted, gesturing towards you while you gave her a look of disbelief.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <i> <b>Earlier This Morning</b></i>
  
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <i>“Shelby! What the fuck do you even wear to church?” You screamed out, slamming your hand against the closet door in frustration. You had no idea why you even agreed to this.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“You can wear anything, Y/N. It’s a church service not meeting the Pope!” Shelby said, rolling her eyes as she took in your messy state.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“Why am I even going again? I told myself eight years ago that I wouldn’t set foot in that church, or any for that matter, ever again.” You complained, going through your outfits for the fifteenth time today. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“Because you love me….and I promised to buy you Starbucks for the rest of the year so I wouldn’t have to be by myself.” </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“Aha!” You cheered, pulling out a lovely sweater dress in your favorite color complete with a cardigan. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>You quickly slipped on the dress and strolled over to the mirror, slimming out the creases and tussling with your hair until you felt it looked presentable enough. Shelby was now sitting down on your bed, picking at her nails.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“Why don’t you sit with what’s his face? Ya know, the guy who you’re doing all this shit for in the first place?” You griped, shoving on your boots one by one. “That would make much more sense than bringing <b>me.</b>”</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Shelby shook her head and stood up, grabbing both of your arms and looking you over. You looked around in confusion until she seemed pleased with the outfit, patting your cheek and turning to leave. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“I have to pretend I already go there and you know it better than I do. I promise this is the only time you have to come.” She vowed, walking through the kitchen and collecting her purse and keys.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>You mocked her silently as you followed behind her, sticking out your tongue to the back of your head. It seemed like she knew though because she flipped you off without even looking up, opening the front door for the both of you to leave.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“I have a feeling I’m going to regret this.” You muttered as you passed her to go into the hallway, tightening your arms as the cold wind of fall showed no mercy. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“Oh come on, Y/N! Live a little!”</i>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“That’s so lovely to hear. I knew God would find his way back to you again, my love.” Your mother hummed, brushing some dust off of your shoulder. You forced a grin and nodded, sitting down beside her with Shelby on your right.</p>
<p>“It’s uh, good to be back?” You said awkwardly, clasping your hands and setting them on your lap. “Is everything still the same?”</p>
<p>“More or less. Father Luke retired so we have a new priest. He is lovely, you would like him.” Your mother babbled, looking over the pamphlet that held all of the news for the week. </p>
<p>You rolled your eyes at her trying to set you up with a priest. Weren’t they celibate? “Yeah, I’m sure a middle-aged balding man is exactly what I need, mom.” You muttered before the sound of heavy footsteps walking down the aisle caught your attention, the church falling into a hushed silence.</p>
<p>The man walking <i>looked</i> young though you only saw the back of his head. He was tall, taller than any priest you had ever seen, with black hair that curled at the ends giving off a boyish look. He was dressed in a gold robe that was customary of the clergy though it had wisps of red that contrasted nicely.</p>
<p>
  <i>There is no way that’s the priest….</i>
</p>
<p>“Please, be seated.” A deep voice called out to everyone, the priest turning around to finally face you. You <i>literally</i> gasped when you saw his face. He was young, late twenties or early thirties, and he was <b>hot</b>. He had a long face that reminded you of the kind of people you see in paintings, his nose large but fitting to his face perfectly.</p>
<p>His freckles dotted his face in an attractive way, eyebrows full but not out of control. The thing that drew you in the most though were his eyes. They were a beautiful brown color that looked to have specks of green, a combination that would make any person swoon.</p>
<p>“Who is that?” You whispered to your mom, crossing your legs in hopes to cure the ache that had settled between them. God himself would probably strike you down for having such impure thoughts in the middle of Sunday service.</p>
<p>“That’s the priest I was just telling you about, his name is Father Ben.” She replied softly, turning back to listen as the sermon began. You chewed your lip as you listened with rapt attention for the first time in your life, hanging on his every word. </p>
<p>You noticed that halfway through the service he had seen you. At first it seemed as if he were just pleased to see a new face, glancing over you as one would do to a stranger on the street until he kept coming back to you. </p>
<p>He stole quick looks which you would shyly look away from, your nerves getting the best of you. You knew that it was completely wrong to find this man attractive and you really shouldn’t entertain the idea. </p>
<p>That’s how the rest of the sermon went, both of you staring at each other longer than necessary while also trying to avoid each other at the same time. It was giving you a headache and by the time everyone got up to leave you were reaching in your purse and popping some ibuprofen.</p>
<p>“Did you like him?” Shelby asked you out of the blue, making you almost choke back up the pills.</p>
<p>“What?!” </p>
<p>“Did you like the priest? I think he’s new.” She continued, shooting you a worried look at how jumpy you suddenly were. “Why are you freaking out?”</p>
<p>You swallow and wave her off, scooting out of the pew and stepping into the aisle so you could leave. “Nothing, it’s nothing. Are you ready?” </p>
<p>“Yeah I guess, I didn’t see Alex at all though. Can you wait for like two minutes while I go look?” Shelby said but didn’t even wait for your response, walking off into the sea of people which left you by yourself.</p>
<p>You looked for your parents but saw them talking to some old couple. You definitely did not want to join that conversation. After about thirty seconds you huffed and decided to wait for her in the car, squeezing between everyone until you saw the front doors.</p>
<p>
  <i>Thank God, I think I was starting to get high off of all the perfumes those women had on and-</i>
</p>
<p>“I don’t believe we’ve met.” Father Ben’s voice stated behind you, a hand landing on your shoulder which halted you in your tracks. “And I’m <i>technically</i> supposed to know everyone.”</p>
<p>You took a deep breath and tried to ground yourself before you turned around, digging your fingernails into your palm to keep your mind in check while you talked with the extremely hot but also extremely off limits priest. </p>
<p>“Yeah I, uh, don’t really go here. My friend just brought me.” You said, meeting his eyes which were even more hypnotizing up close. “Also my parents go here.”</p>
<p>Father Ben’s eyebrows shot up and he turned to look behind him. “Oh really? Who are they?” He asked, missing the way your eyes closed as you smelled his cologne. <i>I need to leave.</i></p>
<p>“They’re right there.” You pointed, hand slightly trembling. “They’ve been going here for a while. Anyways, I should really get going…”</p>
<p>He turned back around just as you started to turn and collapsed your hand between his own. They completely swallowed yours and were warm, almost hot, to the touch. Your eyes zeroed in on the contact. </p>
<p>“Wait! I still didn’t get your name.” He said, his voice warm and deep. It made you want to lay your head on his chest and just listen to him talk. </p>
<p>“Y/N.” You revealed, licking your lips before looking back into his eyes. “It’s Y/N.”</p>
<p>Father Ben grinned and you noticed something flicker in his eyes. It was very brief and you were pretty sure you imagined it but it looked almost feral. He squeezed your hand tightly between his own and then let go, letting it fall back to your side.</p>
<p>“Y/N.” He repeated as you nodded. “It was a pleasure to have you here, hopefully you’ll be back next Sunday.”</p>
<p>You parted your lips in a small gasp, feeling like there was a double meaning to his words before Shelby came up beside you and interrupted. She looked between the two of you before nodding at the priest, locking your arms together. </p>
<p>“You ready?” </p>
<p>“Please.” You whispered, following along with her as you walked outside. You couldn’t resist looking over your shoulder one last time and was pleased to see that he was still watching you although someone was trying to talk to him. </p>
<p>
  <i>Seems I’m not the only one.</i>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <i> <b>Ben</b></i>
  
</p>
<p>Ben walked past his office door and shut it behind him, making sure to lock the door. He could feel that itch on the back of his neck and the chill running up his spine. It was a miracle he had even made it to his office. </p>
<p>He quickly ran to the desk and sat down in the chair, flinging open the bible that was worn and covered in writings and creases. He knew exactly what verse he was looking for but his fingers were so shaky that the pages were sticking together.</p>
<p>When a dark laugh boomed across the room he dropped the bible, placing his head between his heads and saying the Lord’s prayer to will the feeling to go away, to disappear.</p>
<p>It was all for naught though, the smell of brimstone and ash permeating the room until he felt as if he were suffocating. </p>
<p>“<i> <b>Ben, Ben, Ben…</b></i>” A demonic voice chided, clicking its tongue in disapproval. Ben scrunched his eyes closed and took a shuddering breath, his fists clenched tightly.</p>
<p>“Leave. You are not welcome here.” </p>
<p>“<i> <b>Oh but I am, I am. You made sure of that.</b></i>” The voice rumbles while Ben watches in horror as one of the crucifixes on the wall turns upside down. </p>
<p>He tries to calm himself down but when he feels a hand grasp his upper arm, he slams his fists down on the desk. Ben stands up suddenly, the chair falling back and hitting the floor with a loud clang as he stomps over to the mirror that hangs on the other side of the room.</p>
<p>Ben stares at himself in the mirror for a minute, shoulders shaking, until he sees the change. It is a faint glimmer, something that most people would play off as a trick of the eye, but he knew better. </p>
<p>His features suddenly morphed and he was no longer looking at himself...staring back at him was Kylo. They looked similar, eerily so, but Kylo had scars marring his face and blood red eyes that held hellfire in them. </p>
<p>Kylo bared his teeth at Ben, his serpent-like tongue poking out between the needle-like tips. Ben grimaced back, biting his tongue to hold back all of the terrible things that he wanted to scream. However, Kylo knew….he always knew.</p>
<p>“<i> <b>Such a holy and righteous man, Ben Solo. I must say that I have to applaud your performance so far, it's very convincing.</b></i>” Kylo taunted.</p>
<p>“I don’t have to convince anyone of anything.” Ben snapped, knuckles white. “I know who I am.”</p>
<p>“<i> <b>You do?</b></i>” Kylo mused, smirking. “<i> <b>Ah...you do. Or at least you think you do. You may not have to convince others but it seems like you are still trying to convince yourself.</b></i>”</p>
<p>“Stop.”</p>
<p>“<i> <b>Convince yourself that you aren’t damned to hell, telling a lie to everyone you love in order to save face. Tell me, what do you think your fellow clergymen would say if they knew you were <span class="u">lusting</span> after an innocent church member?</b></i>”</p>
<p>“<b>I SAID LEAVE!</b>” Ben shouted at the top of his lungs, hitting his hand against the wall hard enough to make the entire room shake. The only sound in the room was his ragged breaths and a clock slowly ticking by.</p>
<p>After a few minutes with no response, Ben looked into the mirror and saw that it was just him...alone. His hair was sticking to his forehead that was slick with sweat while his lips were slightly trembling. He couldn’t keep doing this, his soul was slowly weakening.</p>
<p>Ben thought he had it under control, that he could easily control his urges and anger and keep the monster at bay. But then she walked in, she sat in that pew, and made sex eyes at him the entire sermon.</p>
<p>Y/N did that to him without even knowing his name. She had so easily consumed his thoughts that it was terrifying. </p>
<p>He knew in the back of his mind that he needed to stay away from her, that she would be his undoing. </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <i> <b>Y/N</b></i>
  
</p>
<p>
  <i>When did it get to be so cold? It’s only November!</i>
</p>
<p>You were walking down in the street towards the town center, your trench coat tied snuggly around your body while your gloved hands were shoved in your pockets. Your work had given you a half-day today due to a lack of clients so you decided to venture to get something to eat, not wanting to get your usual of Mcdonald’s or Chick-Fil-A. </p>
<p>As you passed by the restaurants and other strangers you couldn’t help but let your mind wander, daydreaming about this or that while the sounds of cars rushed into your ears. It was so easy to get lost in your thoughts that you nearly jumped ten feet in the air when you felt a hand on your arm, tugging you back. </p>
<p>“Y/N!” The stranger chirped, turning you around to face them. Your eyebrows immediately shot up when you saw that it was Father Ben. <i>What in the world?</i></p>
<p>“Oh uh, hi Father.” You squeaked, glancing at his very regular clothes and leather jacket that he looked way too good in. You adjusted your purse on your shoulder, looking around to see if he was with anyone. </p>
<p>“Please, please, call me Ben.” He smiled, running a finger through his hair. <i>That has to be a sin.</i> “I just saw you walk by and wanted to see how you were doing.”</p>
<p>You found that really odd because you hardly knew him and you would have remembered seeing if while you were strolling on the sidewalk. There was an alarm going off in the back of your head but you pushed it aside.</p>
<p>
  <i>He’s a priest, my priest apparently, and all priests are naturally friendly and caring. Stop being selfish and just relax, he’s not following you or into you like that.</i>
</p>
<p>After giving yourself that pep talk you found it easier to talk to him, knowing that he was not attracted to you in the slightest. He was just a friendly pastor and you were a good girl who was going to ignore your feelings, you could do that.</p>
<p>“I’m oka-” You replied until you were roughly shoved forward by a passing stranger, making you literally fall into Ben. He caught you easily, his arm wrapped around your waist while his eyes shone with concern. </p>
<p>“Are you okay?” He asked though his tone was short like he was aggravated. You had to fight the urge to stay in his arms.</p>
<p>“Yeah, I’m fine, just some jackass…” You muttered, feeling his hands tense around your upper arms as he helped you stand. He held them there for a tense second before he turned around sharply, looking as if he were about to smash the guy’s head in.</p>
<p>You watched as Ben took a few menacing steps forward and you found yourself yanking <i>him</i> back, eyebrows furrowed together. “Hey, hey! Calm down, Father! It’s okay.” You assured, trying to get his attention as you saw his fist tighten.</p>
<p>“He can’t get away with that.” Ben growled, the sound rumbling deep in his chest. You stared at him in shock. Priests were not supposed to react this way to these kinds of situations, they were supposed to spout off some bullshit about harmony and stuff.</p>
<p>“What?” You said, your voice laced with disbelief that quickly got his attention. “Aren’t you supposed to be like...super calm?”</p>
<p>Ben stared at you in horror, seemingly just as confused as you were before he ran his hand over his face. “Let’s get out of the way.” He murmured, placing his hand on the small of your back as he guided you to a side street. </p>
<p>You watched as he paced back and forth while you leaned against the side of the building, chewing your bottom lip. You had no clue what had just happened to Ben but you were really concerned. He had just flipped at the drop of a hat and although you barely knew him, it was obvious he wasn’t normally like this.</p>
<p>“Um what, what were you saying earlier before we got interrupted?” He asked, voice cracking at the end. You blinked, wondering if you had heard him right but when he stared at you for an answer you shook the fog from your head.</p>
<p>“I was uh, I was just telling you that I’m doing okay. I was just on my way to get something to eat.” You explained, taking a step back when you saw just how close he was to you.</p>
<p>
  <i>Something is definitely wrong.</i>
</p>
<p>“Food, yeah yeah. That’s what I was, uh, what I was going to do too.” Ben rattled on, taking off his jacket which gave you an <i>amazing</i> view of his muscles in the tight shirt that was underneath all those layers. “Are you hot? I’m burning up.”</p>
<p>It was visibly clear that Ben was unwell. His face had turned pale, he was sweating buckets, and it seemed like he was shaking. You immediately went into panic mode, raising your hand up to touch his forehead. “Oh my gosh, are you okay Father? You look like you’re gonna be sick…”</p>
<p>Just as your hand was about to make contact his arm shot up and seized your wrist, squeezing it almost painfully. You winced at the pressure but also at just how hot his hand was, it felt as if you had just stuck your arm over an open fire. </p>
<p>“Father that hurts.” You whimpered, trying to tug away. He didn’t let go. In fact, it felt like he was tightening it until you actually did let out a whine.</p>
<p>The sound woke him up from whatever daze he was in, dropping your hand immediately. Ben swallowed loudly before apologies began spilling out of his mouth, his eyes downcast. He looked like a kicked puppy and while what he did was <i>really</i> concerning, it wasn’t like he had broken your arm or anything.</p>
<p>“Hey shh, shh. It’s okay, no harm done. Maybe you should go home though, I can walk you to make sure-” You began but Ben spoke over you quickly, his tone sounding almost fearful.</p>
<p>“No! No uh, I’m okay. I think I just need to eat.” He explained, pinching the bridge of his nose. You were not convinced in the slightest. </p>
<p>“Are you sure, Ben? It’s really no problem.” </p>
<p>Ben just shook his head and gave you that smile that stopped your heart. You were actually a little relieved because it seemed like he was getting somewhat back to normal, the color returning to his face.</p>
<p>“I’m sure. Do you mind coming with me?” He asks hopefully. “I’ll pay you back for your trouble by buying you lunch.”</p>
<p>“Oh no, you don’t have to do that. It’s fine, I promise.”</p>
<p>“Please.” He fretted, his eyes full of remorse. “Let me make it up to you.”</p>
<p>He held out his hand to you and you stared at it for a minute before slowly putting your hand in his, nodding. You really didn’t want to get more involved with him for your own mental health but you were also concerned he would freak out again. Besides, it was just one dinner.</p>
<p>“Okay.” You sighed, smiling shyly as he beamed and started dragging you back into the main street. “But I get to choose!”</p>
<p>Ben laughed, a sound that made your heart do tiny flips, and nodded. “Of course, of course!” You couldn’t help the giggle that escaped your lips as you slid around people, pushing away the guilt for now.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <i> <b>Ben</b></i>
  
</p>
<p>“Why did I do that?” Ben asked aloud as he walked around his bedroom, his hands tugging his hair to the point of pain. It was the only thing grounding him at the moment. “I can’t get close, I can’t get close.”</p>
<p>He repeats this until he comes to a stop in front of his computer, her social media page brought up. She had everything set to public, including her very <i>sexy</i> beach pictures from this past summer. Ben didn’t know what possessed him to look her up, to drool over her pictures until he felt his pants tighten.</p>
<p>Well, he did know. He just didn’t want to give that name any power.</p>
<p>Ben sat down and pulled up her picture again, the one where she was smiling at the camera with the sun setting behind her. It was his favorite one that he had found, her beauty truly captured at that moment. The way her eyes twinkled with laughter, her hair falling perfectly, the sun casting a halo effect around her body...he was entranced. </p>
<p>He took another deep breath and switched off the monitor, bowing his head while his hand clutched the cross that hung off his neck. </p>
<p>“Heavenly Father, please show me the light. Give me the strength to resist these...urges that Satan has planted in me-”</p>
<p>“<i> <b>Come now Ben, we both know the Dark Lord had no cause in your desire. That is coming from within.</b></i>”</p>
<p>Ben ignored Kylo as best as he could, ignoring the smell of the fires of Hell. He couldn’t let him beat him.</p>
<p>“Show me your true power. Pass your guidance onto me so that I may remain faithful to your teachings.”</p>
<p>“<i> <b>What do you think her pussy tastes like Ben?</b></i>”</p>
<p>“You alone, Lord, are the only one I need. You are my savior and I am your humble servant. I throw myself at your feet in apology and in need of your help.”</p>
<p>“<i> <b>I can just imagine how tight her cunt is. Imagine how it would feel wrapped around your cock, like a vice. It makes me drool just-</b></i>”</p>
<p>“<b>STOP</b>,” Ben yelled, raging to the dresser and pointing his finger at his reflection. “I will not have you do this when I am in the middle of my prayer, you will not.” He commanded.</p>
<p>Kylo came easily to him this time, feeding off the anger that Ben was exuding. He craved it, he <b>thrived</b> off of it. Kylo made a show of licking his lips before making a pouting face, his eyes full of mockery.</p>
<p>“<i> <b>Temper, temper. You do know wrath is a sin, Father.</b></i>” </p>
<p>“I won’t be lectured by the likes of you.” Ben spat, turning away from the mirror to end the conversation until he felt himself still. Dread crawled down his back like thousands of tiny spiders, a full-body shudder traveling through his body.</p>
<p>He felt himself turn around and walk back to the mirror, the eyes of Kylo Ren piercing to his very soul. Ben knew that he was no longer in control...he had let his anger go too far.</p>
<p>“<i> <b>Oh but you aren’t. You are being lectured by <span class="u">you</span>.</b></i>” Kylo laughed wickedly, throwing his head back in twisted delight. After his laughter died down, Kylo raised his hand and slapped himself across the face.</p>
<p>Ben winced as his body mirrored the action, biting back a whimper. He didn’t want to watch anymore.</p>
<p>“<i> <b>While your attempts to rid yourself of me are honorable, I OWN YOU. All of you. You made the deal.</b></i>” Kylo growled, clutching the place over his heart. “<i> <b>This belongs to <span class="u">ME</span>.</b></i>”</p>
<p>Ben wanted to scream, wanted to shout, but he couldn’t even do that. He was at the mercy of this demon, Satan himself. He was merely a puppet in his unholy game.</p>
<p>“<i> <b>I own your soul.</b></i>” Kylo cooed, his voice as soft as velvet. “<i> <b>And soon enough...I’ll own your body too…</b></i>”</p>
<p>Ben felt the tension leave his throat and he went to scream but it came out choked, his hand teasing his cock through his sweatpants. His hand squeezed the shaft before he ran his thumb over the head, his back bowing at the pleasure that flooded through his body.</p>
<p>“Please...ah…” Ben begged, his eyes screwed shut so he didn’t have to see the satisfied look on Kylo’s face. It had been so long since he had touched himself like this, so long since he had allowed himself to partake in the sins of the flesh.</p>
<p>His mind was suddenly flooded with images of a woman...but not just any woman, <i>her</i>. Ben could see himself leering over her body, his hands wrapped around her dainty neck that he could snap in half. He could feel his dick throb in his hand when he heard her moan his name, her head thrown back in pleasure as she begged for him to go faster.</p>
<p>“<i> <b>Do you see? Do you see what I can give you?</b></i>” Kylo whispered, his gaze hungry and eyes the size of slits. “<i> <b>I can give you everything, Ben.</b></i>”</p>
<p>Ben could feel his faith wavering, could practically see his soul hanging in the balance as it dangled over the pits of Hell. He was so close, so close to cumming and giving in to what he craved.</p>
<p>“You…” He panted, swallowing the saliva that had collected in his mouth as he used the last of willpower to push back. “You will never...never have me, Kylo.”</p>
<p>Kylo’s lips turned into a frown, his eyebrows furrowed in anger. His eyes had turned black and his teeth were now bared in a savage way. Ben felt him leave his body and he collapsed to the floor, his clothes completely drenched in sweat as he tried to regain his bearings. Kylo had never held him for so long...he was getting stronger.</p>
<p>Ben heard that laugh, the laugh that haunted him day and night before he saw Kylo vanish in the mirror. He was foolish to think that he was truly gone, that he had gotten rid of him. </p>
<p>That was confirmed when he heard a booming voice in his head, his hands flying up to cover his ears to try and mute the sound. </p>
<p>“<i> <b>You WILL give in to me, Solo. You just need the forbidden fruit.</b></i>”</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <i> <b>Y/N</b></i>
  
</p>
<p>You took a bite of your apple as you sat on the counter of your kitchen, watching Shelby get ready.</p>
<p>“It was so weird...I literally thought he was going to pass out on me.” You rambled, swinging your legs back and forth while anxiously watching the clock. “I didn’t know what to do.”</p>
<p>“And that’s why you’re coming with me again…? To check on him?” Shelby asked, staring at you with suspicion.</p>
<p>“I just want to make sure!” You defended, hopping off the counter and walking to grab your coat. “I might even leave halfway through, who knows?”</p>
<p>Shelby looked you up and down, tilting her head to the side, before shaking her head and walking out the door. You smiled and locked the door behind you, following her and sliding into the heated seats of her car. </p>
<p>The car jumped forward and within a few minutes, you were on the freeway, the radio playing some top pop song while you leaned your head against the window. It was 9:00 on a Sunday morning so neither of you was really in the mood for conversation. </p>
<p>You didn’t understand why you were even bothering to go. Sure you guys had lunch together and it was amazing, giving him your number at the end just in case something happened. Ben never texted you though and you were left with the shame that came with wanting someone who clearly was not interested in you.</p>
<p>Why were you even going? If something had truly happened it would have been on the news. I mean sure, you found Ben attractive but did it really run that deep? You certainly weren’t going for the sermon or the terrible food afterward, nor the shitty wine that everyone drank whenever that was.</p>
<p>You weren’t going for Shelby. She had already repaid you with plenty of Starbucks AND told you that you didn’t have to come back.</p>
<p>So your thoughts drifted back to the man who had been in the center of your mind for the past week and a half. Father Ben. With his stupidly wavy black hair that curled at the ends, his eyes that dazzled in the sun and held hundreds of secrets and promises.</p>
<p>How sweet he was to you at lunch, not being preachy like you had expected. He was kind, told you where he came from and about his family. You could easily see him as the boy next door type, the kind who your parents would love and all the girls would be envious of. </p>
<p>But then, then your mind wandered to how tight he had gripped your wrist on that chilly afternoon. How scary yet exhilarating it felt, the power that he was giving off. The way his lips were just begging to be kissed, so pink and plump while his voice...God his voice. He could make the phone book sound sexy. </p>
<p>It took you a second for all of the thoughts to click into place but when they did, you felt as if your entire body had been dipped in cold water.</p>
<p>“Oh my god, I’m falling for a priest. A fucking priest.” You whispered before letting out a loud cry, your head hitting the side of the window when the car had stopped out of nowhere.</p>
<p>“Ouch! What the fuck, Shelbs?” You groaned, rubbing the sore spot as you sent her a glare. She gave you a sheepish smile.</p>
<p>“Sorry! Sorry! I hate church parking lots…” She complained. You blinked and looked around, realizing that you had been so lost in thought that you were in fact already at the church. “What did you say just a second ago? I couldn’t hear you.”</p>
<p>Your cheeks turned a dark pink and you turned to face the side of the car, brushing off her question. “Nothing, I was just talking to myself.”</p>
<p>Shelby just shrugged her shoulders and whipped into a parking spot, taking off her seatbelt. “Oookay. Ready?”</p>
<p>
  <i>No.</i>
</p>
<p>“Yup! Let’s go!” You said a little too brightly, getting out of the car and welcoming the fresh air. It calmed your nerves as you walked up to the entrance, listening to Shelby talk about her new guy. You were happy to hear things were going well but when you saw who was standing at the entrance, you no longer heard her.</p>
<p>Sweat began collecting on your neck as you saw him greeting and smiling at all of the church members, welcoming them with his signature smile. You felt your stomach twist in knots as you got closer and closer.</p>
<p>You tried to think of a way to get away, an excuse to make. <i>Stomach hurt? No, Shelby knows I haven’t eaten anything. Fever? Nope. Family emergency? Yeah dipshit, do that with your family RIGHT INSIDE. </i></p>
<p>By the time you had finally settled on something, work emergency, you were the next in line. There was nothing you could do without looking like an idiot and with a very heavy sigh, you accepted your fate. </p>
<p>“Good morn-” Ben began before he stopped mid-sentence, locking eyes with you. You squirmed under his gaze, biting down on your lower lip and bowing your head in greeting.</p>
<p>“Father.” </p>
<p>You were certain he could hear your heartbeat with how hard it was racing.</p>
<p>“Y-Y/N. Nice to see you again.” He smiled, looking over you for a moment before he turned to greet Shelby as well. You noticed the way she kept shifting her gaze between the two of you but before she could ask, you whisked her away into a pew.</p>
<p>As you sat down you felt her hit your harm, hard.</p>
<p>“Ow, what the hell?” </p>
<p>“What was that?”</p>
<p>“What?” You decided to play dumb, praying to whoever was listening that it would get her off your back.</p>
<p>“You <span class="u">totally</span> just eye-fucked the priest, Y/N.” She accused, jabbing her finger directly into your chest.</p>
<p>You slapped her hand away and rolled your eyes, turning to look forward as everyone started filing in. “You can’t say that in a church, Shelby.”</p>
<p>“Yeah, and you’re not supposed to make sex eyes at a LITERAL priest!” Shelby argued a little too loudly, making you slap a hand over her mouth to shut her up. </p>
<p>“Shut. Up.” You seethed, narrowing your eyes before you heard Ben clear his throat. The pair of you immediately straightened up, feeling the judgemental stares from everyone in the room at your childish antics.</p>
<p>“Let us pray.” Ben’s voice boomed, everyone bowing their heads.</p>
<p>You kept yours slightly tilted, watching everyone as they repeated his words. You snuck a glance up at Ben and almost fell out of your seat when you saw his eyes staring back at you. You immediately ducked your head down and shut your eyes, like a child would do when they were caught awake when they were supposed to be asleep. </p>
<p>In doing this you missed the absolutely feral grin that was on his face.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>Later that night you were finally crawling into bed, your sheets clean and the blankets warm as you slid inside the cozy cocoon. You were exhausted after the full day you had with Shelby. After the sermon (read: making suggestive eye contact all lecture) you bolted out the doors without telling him goodbye. Shelby then took you shopping in exchange for information on what exactly was going on between the two of you.</p>
<p>When you had confessed that you had feelings for him Shelby started lecturing you on your morals and how wrong it was. She said that yes he was attractive but for you to actively lust after him was terrible. You had your head hung in shame for the rest of the day, the guilt eating you inside as you realized just how right you were.</p>
<p>You were putting Ben in a position that was completely unfair. You knew that he found you attractive but you also knew that went against all of his teachings...and for you to continue to come back and tempt him, it was cruel.</p>
<p>After you got home from shopping you drew a bath and soaked for a good hour, letting the scent of lavender ease your nerves as you mulled over everything. You knew in your heart that you couldn’t see him again, even if that would hurt his feelings. You didn’t want to torment his soul.</p>
<p>So here you were, curled up in a ball in your bed as you came to terms that you didn’t even get to say goodbye to Ben. It was hard and you were shocked to see just how attached you were to him already. You hear all the time about love at first sight and while you were almost certain that wasn’t what it was, it was something akin to that.</p>
<p>You closed your eyes and breathed softly, pushing the thoughts to the side so you could get to sleep. You were, unfortunately, picking up an early shift at work tomorrow and needed all the help you could get. Luckily it was easy to fall asleep after the day you had.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>“<i> <b>Y/N…</b></i>” A voice sang into your ear, making you scramble to a sitting position and yanking your phone off its charger. You pressed the flashlight button and scanned it across the room, clutching at your heart as you tried to calm down.</p>
<p>“Hello?” You whispered, the feeling of something watching you from the shadows sending goosebumps across your skin. <i>Did the room just get really cold or is it the blankets? </i>“Shelby?”</p>
<p>You are completely still for a minute, listening for any signs of life. Nothing could be heard though, not even the crickets outside were singing. You should have been comforted by the silence but it only creeped you out more. </p>
<p>However, you did slide back down into your covers, trying to debunk the noise as just exhaustion or whatever. You kept your eyes open for as long as you could but as the minutes passed it got harder. With a tiny yawn you felt your eyelids close, sleep taking over your fear.</p>
<p>Until you felt a <i>very real</i> hand grab your thigh.</p>
<p>“WHAT THE FUCK!” You shrieked, throwing off the covers and running over to the door. You grabbed the object closest to you, a book, and held it up while you slowly backed up to leave.</p>
<p>“I don’t know who you are but I swear-” You begin to threaten until you feel yourself being picked up and <b>thrown</b> against your closet door, hitting your head on the frame of it. It sent wave after wave of pain throughout your body, your hand trying to come up to hold it until you realized that you couldn’t move.</p>
<p>Your entire body was being held about three inches off of the ground, your arms and legs spread wide while an invisible force squeezed your neck. You tried to thrash and scream but it wasn’t working, it was almost like you were watching your body from somewhere else.</p>
<p>The struggle to free yourself becomes more desperate as that pressure on your throat increases, your eyes brimming with tears at the need for oxygen. You fight and fight until you feel something wet lick along the shell of your ear and down your neck, your head jerking back at the sensation. </p>
<p>It didn’t go away though, if anything it got more intense. The tongue(?) went up and down your neck and over your collarbone before going to the other ear. It seemed to know all of your most sensitive spots and you were cursing yourself in your head at how your body was reacting.</p>
<p>When you felt the ghost hand on your thigh you almost thought about praying, praying for God or someone to save you for whatever the hell was going on. The hand was rubbing small circles up your thigh and began slowly inching closer to your pussy.</p>
<p>You closed your eyes to try and will the force away but quickly realized your mistake. Images started flipping through your mind like you were looking at a picture book...except you were in the book. With Ben.</p>
<p>Every picture was a different still of the two of you but with the same theme...Ben fucking the shit out of you.</p>
<p>You were watching as you rode his cock, your tits bouncing beautifully in the red-tinted room while he grabbed your hips with a bruising force. Then it changed and he had you shoved against a window, your body pressed against the cool glass as his dick rammed in and out of you brutally.</p>
<p>It was too much. A moan slipped past your lips and you felt yourself cum violently, your panties dripping with your cream that was also coating your thighs. Your entire body was shaking but it still wasn’t enough.</p>
<p>You had no idea what was happening to you but you were too high on the lust to care, the images getting more violent and vivid as the ghost hand roughly shoved your panties to the side and slid two fingers inside of your sopping wet cunt. A cry could be heard as your hips raised, fucking yourself on its fingers.</p>
<p>The primal urge in you to fuck was overwhelming, all of your other thoughts going blank except for the need to cum. You could feel your heart twisting painfully but it only added to your pleasure, your mouth forming a perfect o as the fingers started to curl inside of you.</p>
<p>“<i> <b>That’s it, that’s it…</b></i>” A voice purred into your ear, your brain recognizing it as the voice who had called your name. It sounded extremely familiar but also distorted. “<i> <b>Fuck yourself on my hand baby girl.</b></i>”</p>
<p>You opened your eyes and you screamed, your voice cracking at how high it went. Standing in front of you was Ben...except his eyes were blood red and he had a tongue like a snake. He was leering at you like a predator would his prey, drinking in your every reaction.</p>
<p>Scary Ben laughed maniacally at your panicked expression, his mouth coming down to swallow your scream which only grew louder as you tried to push him off. He was much stronger than you, his hands capturing your wrists just like the other day.</p>
<p>“<i> <b>Man does Ben pick them good.</b></i>” Scary Ben murmured, holding you up but removing his hand from your dripping pussy. You watched in shock as he brought it up to his mouth and slurped all of the juices off of it. “<i> <b>I can’t wait to taste this cunt.</b></i>”</p>
<p>You didn’t know what to do, your fear and arousal mixing together in an absolutely chaotic cocktail that was about to explode. You needed to escape before it got any worse.</p>
<p>“Ben, Ben!” You pleaded, your breath coming in uneven pants. “Let me go, please. We can, we can talk! I don’t care that we have sex but we should at least-”</p>
<p>A hand over your mouth effectively shut you up, Scary Ben snarling. “<i> <b>Shut the fuck up. You’re gonna-</b></i>” He stopped mid-sentence and you saw the outline of his body shimmer. Scary Ben snapped his eyes back up to yours and he looked like he was about to slit your throat, his hand moving from your hand to your throat where he squeezed <b>hard</b>.</p>
<p>You started clawing at his hand until you felt yourself falling, everything around you disappearing as you fell into a black abyss. You reached out your arms in a feeble attempt to catch something and that’s when you noticed someone watching you fall, screaming your name.</p>
<p>“<i>Y/N</i>!” Ben wailed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>You shot up in your bed, hands scratching at your throat as you continued to scream. It took you a second to realize you were back in your bedroom, with no Scary Ben, and no black hole. Your scream died in your throat as you all but ran to your bathroom and stared at your reflection, your eyes widening in horror.</p>
<p>Your neck was covered in rough scratches from your nails while your arms and thighs were littered with purple bruises. It looked as if you had just been dragged through hell. </p>
<p>“What the fuck, what the fuck, what the fuck…” You repeat to yourself as your hands fumbled with the faucet of the sink, splashing cold water over your face to cool off your body.</p>
<p>After a few minutes of cooling off and staring off into your mirror, you summoned up the courage to open the door to your bedroom. You kicked it open and let out a sigh of relief when you saw it was empty. </p>
<p>However you didn’t feel safe anymore, grabbing your blanket and sprinting across the darkened house to Shelby’s room. You carefully slipped underneath her weighted blanket and clung to her, your body now trembling while tears fell down your cheeks. </p>
<p>“Huh?” Shelby mumbled groggily, turning to look at you. “Y/N? Are you okay?”</p>
<p>You just shook your head, not wanting to talk. Thankfully Shelby didn’t press you, opening her arms to you and letting you snuggle into her fully. She hummed while stroking your head, a lullaby that her mother once sang to her.</p>
<p>You slowly fell into a dreamless slumber.</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <i> <b>Ben</b></i>
  
</p>
<p>Ben walked into the church in utter exhaustion. He hadn’t slept more than a few hours in weeks, his appetite was gone, and his soul...his soul was in turmoil. </p>
<p>He had missed his past two sermons at the church, claiming illness when in reality he was running away from his problems. When Ben had seen her in a dream, watched as she fell into Kylo’s clutches, it had driven him crazy. Kylo had gained great power that day when Ben had given in to his urges, feeding off of it like a leech.</p>
<p>And now he was obviously using it to his advantage, going into her dream and claiming her as if she were some sort of prize. Ben knew that Kylo had shown her his true form, using his face in order to plant the seed of doubt into her mind.</p>
<p>Every day for the past two weeks he had spent hours yelling into his bedroom mirror, cursing Kylo’s name, and trying everything to get him to appear. But Kylo refused. This only upset him more, the holes in his bedroom wall showing just how pissed off he was.</p>
<p>Ben had turned to scripture, turned to prayer, turned to the internet, he flipped over every rock and looked in every nook and cranny to try and find a way to save her but nothing came up. It was as if the universe was enjoying his descent into madness, his slow climb up the ladder of insanity. </p>
<p>It took everything in him not to go to her house and to check on her but he knew that if she saw him, especially after seeing Kylo, he would have to explain everything. Y/N would be terrified of him, of the monster that was constantly lurking inside of him. </p>
<p>The monster that he put there six years ago.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <i> <b>December 24th, 2014</b></i>
  
</p>
<p>
  <i>“Get out of my house!” Ben thundered his face a bright shade of red. He could feel the vein on the side of his head popping out as he screamed at his father. “I don’t want you here, I don’t want you in my life, get the <span class="u">fuck</span> out!”</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“Ben…” Han pleaded, holding his hands up to try and show him that he only meant peace. “I just wanted to say goodbye to her. I have to.”</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Ben started pacing back and forth, his sweater growing twenty degrees hotter by the rage that was building inside of him. “No! You can’t just walk in here after leaving mom, leaving me, and get to pretend everything is okay.”</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Han looked like he was at a loss for words, opening and closing his mouth like he was trying to say something but it wouldn’t come out. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“You don’t get to come in here and torment her one more time. I couldn’t stop you when I was younger but I sure as hell can now.” Ben seethed, his pupils blown wide.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“You don’t understand…”</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>A laugh bubbled up in Ben’s chest at his father’s words, not believing the fucking nerve that this man had. He was clutching his stomach at how hard he was laughing. “I don’t?” He spluttered, hot tears rolling down his face. “I don’t understand that you left our family for some back alley whore you stole all of your money?”</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“Ben.”</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“Or is it when you dropped me off at Maz’s house every other weekend because you were too drunk to watch your own son?”</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“Listen to me, please.”</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>When he heard Han’s voice crack at the end it snapped something inside of him, something darker than hatred. What right did he have to cry when he hadn’t seen Leia in FOURTEEN YEARS? He wasn’t hurt, he wasn’t sad, he was so full of himself that he just had to rub salt into the wound one last time.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>And Ben, Ben couldn’t let that happen.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>He had to save his mom one last time.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Ben stormed over to where Han was standing, the fireplace behind him popping, before grabbing him by the collar of his musty jacket. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“You had your chance. You had multiple chances to fix it and you didn’t. So now you live with it. Get out and <span class="u">never</span> come back.”</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Han’s bottom lip quivered slightly and Ben could’ve sworn that he saw tears sparkling at the corner of his eyes. He could see the hurt and pain that was in Han’s eyes but he was so angry, so wounded, that he pushed it away and held fast to his wrath.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“Okay, son. Okay.”</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Ben dropped him and watched as he walked across the carpeted living room, seeing his hands tremble and shoulders shake. And as Han walked out the door, casting one more look at him before shutting the door, Ben collapsed to the floor.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>It was as if a tide came in and washed away all his anger but brought back all of his pain and loneliness. Ben had thrown his father out and hadn’t even let him say goodbye because <span class="u">he</span> was angry. </i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Who was he to judge Han? What if someone had done that to him? The guilt began eating away at his heart, his lips swollen and red from how hard he wept.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>And later that night when Ben was kneeling by his mother’s bed, watching her draw in her last breath, he was now full of shame. Perhaps Han had wanted to apologize or see her one last time, maybe it could’ve given her something to cling on to.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Ben wasn’t protecting his mother when he yelled at Han...he was protecting himself.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Those terrible feelings that were raining on him like acid only grew when he felt his cell phone ring, an unknown number popping up. Dread filled his stomach before he could even answer it, swallowing thickly before bringing it up to his ear.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“Hello?”</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“Hi, is this Ben Solo?”</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>Ben bit down his knuckle and nodded, making a small noise to let her know she was right because all of his words were stuck in his throat.</i>
</p>
<p>
  <i>“Can you come down to Tristar Regional Hospital? It’s your father, Han.”</i>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Ben blinked wearily as he came back to reality though those feelings stayed with him. He looked down and realized that his bible now had wet spots dotting the verses, blurring the words.</p>
<p>He was weak. He had sold his soul to save his father who ended up overdosing two weeks later from what Ben had said to him. He let his mother die without talking to the only man she truly loved.</p>
<p>He let himself get close to Y/N, knowing that in doing so he would be dragging her down to hell with him. Ben was a catalyst for destruction. His soul couldn’t be saved, he couldn’t put others first, he was a monster.</p>
<p>Ben was Kylo. Kylo was Ben.</p>
<p>“<i> <b>Poor little Benny, all alone.</b></i>”</p>
<p>When he heard his voice, he openly wailed. He could feel the cold chill run down his back and neck. Something in him was trying to get him to move, to run, but Ben was tired.</p>
<p>“<i> <b>Poor little Benny has nowhere to go.</b></i>”</p>
<p>He felt two hands brace themselves on his shoulders, sharp claws digging into the skin. Ben couldn’t even feel the pain anymore.</p>
<p>“<i> <b>If only poor Benny could have seen.</b></i>”</p>
<p>“Please…” Ben begged, sluggishly turning to the mirror to see Kylo standing right behind him. </p>
<p>“<i> <b>That all of his roads...led to me.</b></i>”</p>
<p>Kylo’s hand wrapped around Ben’s throat slowly, like a serpent, before sliding two fingers into his mouth. He didn’t fight him though, closing his eyes and succumbing to his inner demon. There was no strength left in him to argue, to resist, no light at the end of the tunnel.</p>
<p>“<i> <b>I’m so glad you realize that we are one and the same. We are one. And if you let me in….I can take all of it away.</b></i>”</p>
<p>Ben’s body was entirely relaxed, slumping down in the large leather chair. He had never felt peace like this, not since he was a child. It was comforting, like accepting death. He began to wonder why he hadn’t realized this before.</p>
<p>“<i> <b>I can turn off our feelings, make you forget anything that has ever happened. You just have to say the words and I can do the rest.</b></i>”</p>
<p>Something in the back of his mind was screaming at him to wake up, to struggle against the chains that were steadily tightening around his body. He wanted to do something but it was too late, his lips whispering out the line that sealed his fate forever.</p>
<p>“<i>Cor meum tibi offero domine prompte et sincere.</i>”</p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <i> <b>Y/N</b></i>
  
</p>
<p>The last two weeks had been hell for you, literally. The night after you had the dream, it happened again. And again. And again. Every single night for the past two weeks you were being fucked by Scary Ben and you were <i>enjoying</i> it.</p>
<p>You had long stopped fighting the force in the dream and welcomed the sensation, hoping that maybe if you just gave in to your darkest desire that it would go away. But you were wrong.</p>
<p>The dreams only got more violent and you were no longer enjoying them. In fact, you were terrified to go to sleep. Your body was littered with bruises and bite marks, your eyes had bags upon bags underneath them, and it felt like your soul was crying out. You had tried everything you could think of to get them to go away. Drugs, alcohol, prayer, having sex with strangers, writing, anything that would normally help was suddenly not working.</p>
<p>As you stared in the mirror this morning, covering up all of your marks as best as you could, it was like you had a revelation. You felt something shift in your body and you realized that this was a punishment.</p>
<p>God was punishing you for wanting to fuck Father Ben. He was tormenting you to get you to repent and that, that would fix everything.</p>
<p>It all made sense, or at least in your sleep-deprived mind it did. Why else would this be happening to you if God didn’t want you to confess and move on? Once you had come to terms with that you had immediately called the church and asked to meet with any pastor except Ben, citing privacy. They were more than willing to accommodate you and told you to come over after 6:00. </p>
<p>You had spent the rest of the day anxiously watching the clock, hoping that by going and confessing that it would make all of your problems vanish. And then you could run like hell and never return.</p>
<p>So when 5:30 came, you all but sprinted down the crowded streets and skidded to a stop at the church. You looked around and noticed how quiet it was on this street, nobody walking around. The sun had just set and there was an ominous red halo around the building. </p>
<p>The sound of your heels clicking on the grey pavement was deafening as you slowly climbed the stairs, your hand hesitating on the doorknob.</p>
<p>
  <i>This is silly. God isn’t real, this can’t be the answer. I’m just overworked and horny and….</i>
</p>
<p>The door to the church opened by itself, silencing your inner monologue. There was no noise, no chatter of nuns or whispered prayers. All of the lights were off except for the natural light coming in from the stained glass windows, which made the room a blood-red color due to the sunset. You swallowed thickly and took a hesitant step inside, chewing your inner cheek as you slowly crept down the aisle.</p>
<p>You could see the statue of Jesus watching you as you moved, his blank eyes staring directly into your soul. You quickly looked away and into the empty pews though they didn’t feel empty….it felt as if there were people there, watching you. Waiting for you to slip or misstep so they could pounce you.</p>
<p>The temperature was freezing, so cold in fact that you could see your breath come out in tiny puffs. You wrapped your arms tight around your body and decided to hurry into the confession room, noticing there was already someone waiting for you on the opposite side.</p>
<p>The walk to the box seemed to get longer and longer as you walked to it like you were in a dream. Once you reached it you didn’t dare peek through the slits in the wall, shakily sitting down and letting out a breath you didn’t know you had been holding.</p>
<p>“<i> <b>What is it you wish to confess, my child?</b></i>” A voice asked you.</p>
<p>You could have sworn you had heard it before but your mind was coming up blank. It was if it had been wiped from your memory or something but you didn’t dwell on it, your anxiety was already spiked.</p>
<p>
  <i>Probably from a past sermon or something.</i>
</p>
<p>“Father I-” You began, voice quivering slightly. You didn’t realize just how hard this was going to be. “I’ve been having some terrible, terrible thoughts.”</p>
<p>An intake of breath was your only reply and you felt a chill come through the cracks of the confessional box. You gripped the skin of your pants and took in another deep breath.</p>
<p>“It’s about one of your priests. And before I tell you, can you promise me that he won’t be harmed because of what I’m about to say? He had no part in this and I don’t want him to be cast out because of me.”</p>
<p>A deep, rumbling laugh came from the priest before he cleared his throat. “<i> <b>I can assure you that he will not be cast out because of this.</b></i>” The priest assured.</p>
<p>You worried your bottom lip for a moment before deciding that you trusted him, that it would be okay. “It’s Father Ben. I came to a sermon with my friend and I saw him and I was...attracted to him.”</p>
<p>“<i> <b>Attraction is not a sin, little one.</b></i>” The priest chided, clicking his tongue and what seemed like a disapproving way. “<i> <b>Is there more?</b></i>”</p>
<p>You leaned your head against the wall and closed your eyes, deciding to just come out with it. This was your last resort and you just needed to push through, rip off the bandaid no matter how hard it was going to be to face the repercussions. </p>
<p>“It was more than attraction, Father. It was lust. I, I wanted him. I wanted him to do things to me, unholy and sinful things. I dream about it every night and they are getting harder and harder to deal with. This guilt of wanting this priest to fuck me. I have nowhere else to turn.” Your voice cracked at the end of your confession and you felt tears slide down your cheeks, your mascara more than likely running.</p>
<p>You had never told anyone all of your feelings toward Ben and it felt amazing to let them out, to not carry the burden completely on your own anymore. It also meant you felt shame as you had just told a priest that you wanted one of his brothers to fuck you senseless.</p>
<p>It was completely quiet on his side of the box for a few minutes and you thought that he had either left or was calling on God to take you to the pits of hell. </p>
<p>What you didn’t expect was the wicked laugh that rang out, making you jump and hit your head. </p>
<p>“<i> <b>Did you hear that Ben? I told you that she wanted us, that she craved our body as we do hers.</b></i>” The priest sang, his voice making you shudder in fear. </p>
<p>You now know who that voice belonged to, the memories hit you like a train. Your blood ran cold in your veins and you opened the latch and took off back into the main atrium, your heart thumping in your chest. You chanced a look back and when you did, you ran into something solid.</p>
<p>“<i> <b>Tsk, tsk, tsk.</b></i>” Scary Ben tutted, winding his hand through your hair before yanking it painfully so that you were staring directly into his blood-red eyes. “<i> <b>Just where do you think you’re going?</b></i>”</p>
<p>A whimper escaped your throat as you came face to face with the man who had haunted your dreams, who had given you so much pleasure yet so much pain. Your body didn’t know what to do, how to react. You knew this wasn’t a dream this time, that everything was painfully real.</p>
<p>“Please Ben, please. Let me go. I don’t want to get you in trouble and I didn’t realize that was you-” You pleaded, wincing at the pain that was radiating across your scalp. “We can talk about this.”</p>
<p>Scary Ben sneered at you, rolling his eyes at your attempts to break away from his grasp. “<i> <b>Don’t play coy with us now, Y/N. You know you want this just as much as we do.</b></i>”</p>
<p>You opened your mouth to protest but clamped it shut when you felt him pinch your nipple harshly over your shirt, your back arching at the euphoria that exploded throughout your body. </p>
<p>“Who’s we?” You panted, eyes half-lidded as you watch that long tongue come out and lick the sweat that was dripping down your neck. </p>
<p>“<i> <b>You haven’t figured it out yet baby girl?</b></i>” He purred against your throat, lightly sucking over your pulse point. “<i> <b>This isn’t Ben talking to you.</b></i>” </p>
<p>You felt your heart drop and you used all of your might to shove him off of you, falling down and hitting your ass on the white marble floors. The sight of Not Ben staring down at you, his eyes devouring your body, was enough to make you scramble backward. </p>
<p>“<i> <b>Oh no, I think we scared her.</b></i>” Not Ben cooed, bending down and running his fingers down your cheek which made you flinch back. You had no idea what to do, no idea how to escape. “<i> <b>Would you like to talk to him, princess?</b></i>” </p>
<p>You stared at him blankly for a second before nodding, watching as Not Ben closed his eyes and shuddered violently. You began to try to stand to make a break for it but as you did, you heard him. You heard Ben.</p>
<p>“Y/N?” He called out to you, his hazel eyes full of worry. </p>
<p>“Ben!” You breathed, running up to him and wrapping your arms around his neck. He no longer smelled differently and he didn’t have those haunting red eyes, it was just him. Just your Ben. “What’s going on? What are you doing?”</p>
<p>Ben returned your hug with his own, squeezing you tightly into his arms. He nuzzled his face into your neck and took a breath before pulling away to stare at you. “It’s hard to explain. I’m sorry you had to find out like this.”</p>
<p>“Find out what? Ben tell me who that was, what is happening to you.” You said, grabbing his hands. </p>
<p>He didn’t answer you immediately though, instead choosing to go back down to your neck where he began to lay gentle kisses. “That was me…” He confessed, his fingers slowly trailing up the sides of your body. “Kylo is me, I am Kylo.”</p>
<p>You didn’t understand, not at all. Who the hell was Kylo and why did he look like that? How was he in the same body? All of these questions were running through your mind but his kisses and touches were also <i>very</i> distracting.</p>
<p>“Ben, stop. Stop. This isn’t making any sense.” You breathed, moaning when his lips came back up to your mouth and kissed you for the first time. It felt like fireworks were going off everywhere, blood rushing in your ears as you practically melted into him. </p>
<p>He easily caught you, both of his hands coming up to cup your jaw as you tilted your head to the side to deepen the kiss. The taste of his mouth was indescribable, it made your heart flutter in ways that no one had before. </p>
<p>You found your hands running through his hair, your lips becoming more urgent against his as he backed you up until you hit something solid. You looked down to see that he had pinned you between his legs and the offering table. </p>
<p>“This is wrong, Ben. This is so wrong. You could get in so much trouble.” You tried to reason, watching as he stood above you and began to unbuckle his pants. Every inch of your body was screaming at you to shut up, to enjoy the moment, while your brain was trying to remind you that there was <i>something</i> inside of Ben. Something otherworldly.</p>
<p>“But Y/N,” He huffed, smirking at how wrecked you looked already. “How can something this good be so bad?”</p>
<p>You went to answer but stopped when you felt him tear open your sweater, ripping it straight down. Ben immediately cupped your breasts through your bra, a groan sounding out from his chest that had your thighs clenching. </p>
<p>“Why would God give us things to tempt us if He didn’t want us to taste them from time to time?” He mused, sliding his hand under your back to unhook your bar before throwing it somewhere to the side. </p>
<p>His hot mouth closed around your nipple and gave a hard suck that had you keening loudly, your legs finding their way around his hips as your fingers scratched against the wood of the table. You had never felt this good in all of your life, it was as if he was directly touching your soul.</p>
<p>“Why would we let Him deny us anything? What gives him the power?” Ben growled against your breast, his other hand sneaking up your stomach and rolling your other nipple between his thumb and forefinger. “Kylo has shown me the truth, Y/N.”</p>
<p>The mention of Kylo quickly had you sitting up, staring at Ben. “I don’t understand…” You murmured before you squeaked, Ben harshly grabbing your jaw and pinching it until your mouth was forced open.</p>
<p>“Don’t you understand?” He barked, watching as drool began to drip down your chin. Your eyes were full of fear, feeling it knot in your stomach, but your body...your body was having a different reaction. “Kylo is the answer.”</p>
<p>Ben sounded delirious at this point and you saw his eyes flicker between red and brown, his tongue taking on a forked shape slowly. </p>
<p>“He showed me what we can become.” His voice was becoming distorted. “Join me Y/N.” Ben whispered before he bit down harshly on your bottom lip, ignoring your cries as he drew blood.  </p>
<p>
  
    Tears pricked the corners of your eyes as you felt the blood mix in with the drool, your jaw aching from the pressure that Ben was putting on it. “I can give you everything."
  
</p>
<p>
  The last word was a growl and your body tremble as Ben disappeared, Kylo taking his place with an evil smirk. You tried to twist your head to escape his grip but he only tightened it. 
  
</p>
<p>
  
   “<i> <b>I think that was enough talking.</b></i>” Kylo griped, throwing your head back so that it hit the table before bending down to grab the discarded belt that was on the floor. “<i> <b>It’s time to play.</b></i>”
</p>
<p>
 
    You saw stars behind your eyes at the pain, both of your hands reaching up to cover yourself only for Kylo to capture them and tie them together with his belt.
</p>
<p>
  “<i> <b>It’s not chains but it will have to do….</b></i>” He mused, tightening it until you felt like you were going to lose circulation. The sun had long since set so you were in complete darkness, the only light in the room coming from Kylo’s eyes.
  
</p>
<p>
  Kylo licked his lips and dragged his clawed finger down your chest, leaving a red line in its place. Your breath quickened when you saw him pop open the button to your pants, all of his focus on what you had underneath.
</p>
<p>
  “Kylo, please. You don’t have to do this.” You said, watching as he ignored you and began to slide your pants and panties down until they were laying on the floor. “I want to go home.”
</p>
<p>
  He apparently got sick of your whining because the next thing you knew, he laid a harsh slap on your cunt that had you let out a scream. “<i> <b>Drop the innocent act, baby girl. We both know you’ve been dreaming about this, craving it. You should be grateful.</b></i>”
</p>
<p>
  “I-I haven’t…” You tried to explain before you felt your eyes widen as his tongue licked a long strip up your soaking sex. It lit every nerve you had on fire and had you fighting against your restraints. “Fuck!”
</p>
<p>
  “<i> <b>You can say what you want but this pussy tells a different story.</b></i>” Kylo chuckled, flicking it over your clit before dipping back down to tease your entrance. “<i> <b>Fuck you taste amazing.</b></i>” He grunted, the sound of him eating you out filling the empty room.
</p>
<p>
  Your body and mind were actively fighting against each other, both of them trying to reason with you on why you should listen to them. You knew that what was happening was wrong, <i>so fucking wrong</i>. Not only were you being eaten out by a priest, but a demon one! You were literally ticking off all of the things that would get you sent to hell.
</p>
<p>
  But god could you honestly care less at the moment.
</p>
<p>
  “<i> <b>I can feel the conflict in you, Y/N. You want this so bad but are so worried….</b></i>” He stated, slapping your cunt harder this time to get your attention. “<i> <b>Keep your fucking eyes on me, baby girl. Don’t you dare look away.</b></i>” 
 
</p>
<p>
  His eager red eyes rolling back in pleasure when he slipped his tongue inside of you, purring at the sensation of your walls tightening around it. When he purred you about came right there, your hips starting to rock into his face as you could feel yourself getting closer. 
 
</p>
<p>
  Kylo dragged his tongue back out before plunging it back in at a rapid speed, his hands circling your thighs and yanking you harshly down until your ass was hanging off the edge of the table. You felt the harsh wood scratch against your back but you were too gone to care.
</p>
<p>
  “<i> <b>Aw, are you gonna cum baby? Is the little slut going to cum all over my tongue?</b></i>” He taunted you, throwing your legs over his shoulders as he continued to drink you down like you were his favorite flavor. You were trying so hard to keep your eyes on him but you wanted nothing more than to throw your head back in pleasure.
</p>
<p>
  You wanted to come so bad, so fucking bad, but that little piece of your mind was preventing you from climaxing. It kept reminding you that you would never be able to come back from this, that you were about to pass the point of no return. It was so frustrating that you screamed out in exasperation.
</p>
<p>
  “<i> <b>Are you still trying to convince yourself?</b></i>” He snarled, displeased that you weren’t easily giving into your lust. You couldn’t form the words to explain your feelings. “<i> <b>I bet I can.</b></i>”
</p>
<p>
  You tried to wrap your mind around his words but suddenly you were blinded, something was thrown over your face to keep you from seeing what Kylo was doing.
</p>
<p>
  Suddenly you felt his tongue vanish and you cried, pleas and curses spilling out of your mouth as you begged to cum. You had never been this desperate to cum before and the fact that your own mind was actively trying to get you not to was cruel.
</p>
<p>
 It seemed that your cries fell on deaf ears until you felt the sensation return, except the tongue wasn’t nearly as long. You were confused until you heard him.
</p>
<p>
  "Y/N, you taste so good…” Ben groaned into your cunt, the sweater flying back off so that you were able to see again. You immediately lifted your head and swore when you saw Ben between your legs, his brown eyes full of desire.
</p>
<p>
  “Ooooh fuck, Ben!” You cried, feeling the belt come undone. You immediately buried your hands into his hair and started to fuck his face, back arching completely off the table. “Fuck, fuck, fuck…”
</p>
<p>
  Ben looked like he was in heaven, his eyes closed as he swirled his tongue around and around. He pursed his lips around your clit and hummed which had you yanking his hair painfully, your walls pulsing. 
</p>
<p>
  “Ben, ben, ben!” You screamed, feeling your juices drip down your ass as he ate you perfectly. “Fuck me please, please!” You gasped, whining when you felt two fingers plunge into you with a squelching sound.
</p>
<p>
  “Fuuuuuuuuuck you are so fucking tight, princess!” Ben growled, slurping you up with a new determination as he started to crook his fingers to hit your g-spot. 
</p>
<p>
  “Cum for me Y/N please, please. Cum around my fingers and let me taste you please!” His voice was now a full whine, finger fucking you into the next life as you felt yourself clamp down on his fingers until your orgasm rocked through your body like lightning. 
</p>
<p>
  "FUCK! BEN!” You shrieked, pushing his face all the way into your pussy as you had the most powerful orgasm of your life. It could be felt in your fingers, your toes, hell even your ears. Your entire body was on fire in the most delicious way possible.
</p>
<p>
  “Y/N, Y/N, Y/N….” He praised you, slowing down his fingers and tongue until you were twitching from overstimulation. Ben lowered your legs from his shoulders and slid up your body, kissing you tenderly so that you could taste yourself on him.
</p>
<p>
  “Mmm…” You cooed, lazily letting your tongues dance as you came back down to earth. You pulled away from the kiss to look at Ben, who was smiling at you so hard that his eyes were crinkled at the side. 
</p>
<p>
  “Did you enjoy that?” He murmured against your lips, gazing at you softly. “Did you like cumming on my tongue?”
</p>
<p>
 You blushed and nodded, running your thumb softly across his cheek until he caught your wrist. You looked down at his hand before looking back at him and almost screamed, his other hand covering your mouth as you stared at Kylo.
</p>
<p>
  “<i> <b>How sweet…</b></i>” Kylo smirked, giving you a sly wink. “<i> <b>But now it’s my turn to make you cum.</b></i>”
  
</p>
<p>
 He pulled you off the table and strolled over to where the priest would stand to give a sermon. You stood in front of it, looking out over the empty pews and the statue of Jesus that was above the door. At that moment you felt your sins crawling up your back.
</p>
<p>
  “What are you-” You started to ask but yelped when you felt his hand land on your ass, grasping onto the stand to make sure you didn’t fall. 
</p>
<p>
 “<i> <b>Oh don’t act like you didn’t like that, baby. I can see your pussy gushing from here.</b></i>” He said before he smacked you again, turning the other cheek just as red. You shut your eyes and breathed through your nose to fight off a scream.
</p>
<p>
  But what came next you couldn’t prepare yourself for, the sound of a whip cracking across the atrium before you felt the pain of it blossom across your naked back.
</p>
<p>
  “FUCK! OW!” You shouted, knuckles white as you held on for dear life. You could just feel the whelps rising but that didn’t stop him, in fact it only spurred him on.
</p>
<p>
  “<i> <b>You look so sexy in red, baby girl.</b></i>” Kylo purred, bringing it down three times fast across your thighs that had your knees wobbling. You didn’t know how much more of this you could take, your mind slowly turning to mush as the pleasure mixed with the pain. 
</p>
<p>
  “Stop, please…” You panted though you knew you had never been wetter than at this moment. Kylo knew too because he didn’t relent.
</p>
<p>
 “<i> <b>You dirty fucking whore. You enjoy me whipping you.</b></i>” He goaded, coming closer to pinch your clit between his fingers. You sucked in a breath at the pleasure and, embarrassingly, you came.
</p>
<p>
  You felt it coat his fingers and heard his disbelieving laugh, closing your eyes in shame as he strolled in front of you. He put two fingers under your chin and lifted your head, his eyes mocking.
</p>
<p>
  “<i> <b>You just,</b></i>” He chuckled darkly, licking his lips. “<i> <b>You really just came by a pinch of my fucking fingers.</b></i>”
</p>
<p>
 There were no words that came out of your mouth as you looked away, feeling the aftershocks flutter inside your belly. He wasn’t having that though, forcing you to look back at him. “<i> <b>That’s a punishment right there.</b></i>”
</p>
<p>
  “A punishment?” You whispered, feeling him come up behind you and run his hot hand over your bruised ass. “What punishment?”
</p>
<p>
  Kylo didn’t answer but you heard what sounded like a zipper being undone. You waited with bated breath before you felt something slid against your inner folds, something warm and <i> <b>studded</b></i>.
</p>
<p>
  “<i> <b>You are going to recite the Lord’s prayer,</b></i>” Kylo explained, barely pushing the tip of his dick inside you before pulling out. “<i> <b>And if you get through it without cumming, I’ll let you have Ben.</b></i>”

</p>
<p>
  
      <i>Okay, okay. I can do this. I just came twice so it shouldn’t be that hard.</i>
    
</p>
<p>
  
    <b>“<i> <b>If you fail...your soul is mine.</b></i>”
</b></p><p>
  <b></b>
</p>
<p>
  <b></b>
</p>
<p>
  The last statement had you second-guessing yourself. It was one thing to think that you were damned but to know you were? To willingly sell your soul? There were certain drawbacks to it. But if you were successful, you could get Ben back.
</p>
<p>
  “<i> <b>I don’t have all fucking day.</b></i>” Kylo complained before you nodded, swallowing the lump in your throat. 
</p>
<p>
  “O-Okay. I can, I can do it.” You stuttered, focusing on the ground. If you could just keep your mind off of it you would be able to beat the devil. 
</p>
<p>
 “<i> <b>Wonderful….let’s begin.</b></i>” He whispered before he hilted inside you in one thrust, his cock inhumanly large and rigid that it felt like you were going to be torn apart. It felt fucking amazing. 
</p>
<p>
  You licked your lips as Kylo started a brutal pace, the studs in his dick rubbing against your walls in the most delicious way. You could already feel a third orgasm approaching as he fucked you deep.
</p>
<p>
  “<i> <b>Go baby girl.</b></i>” He grunted, grabbing a handful of your ass that made you roll your hips back to meet him. “<i> <b>Unless you’re ready to give up?</b></i>”
</p>
<p>
  You shook your head and took a deep breath. “Our Father who art in Heaven,” You began, moaning as he hit particularly deep. “H-Hallowed be thy n-name.”
</p>
<p>
 “Y/N….” Ben whispers into your ear and you immediately turn to your left, eyes widening as you see him fisting his cock in his large hands while you are getting fucked from behind. “Just cum for him. We can be together and I can be with you whenever we want….”
</p>
<p>
  You blinked and he vanished. It was easy to realize that Kylo was making you see things, trying to get you to give into him. You bit your lip and opened your mouth to continue but stopped when you felt someone lick your clit.
</p>
<p>
 Ben was now underneath you, sucking your juices as they dripped onto the floor. Your eyes rolled into the back of your head at the sensation and you heard Kylo’s deep chuckle, his hand coming up to grab your hair and pull your neck back so you were looking up.
</p>
<p>
 “<i> <b>Fucking look at Him when you are praying, bitch.</b></i>” Kylo snarled, going in and out of you slowly before speeding up once more. 
</p>
<p>
You stared up at the statue, feeling His eyes judge you as you got fucked by Satan himself. Ben was still happily rolling his tongue over your clit and moaning around it, the sound of himself jacking off like music to your ears.
</p>
<p>
  “Thy Kingdom come.” You started again, your eyes fluttering at the sensations that were consuming your body. “On Earth as it is, as it is in Heaven.”
</p>
<p>
  Suddenly you felt yourself being pulled down and you landed directly onto Ben’s chest, his eyes dangerous while his chin gleamed in the moonlight that bathed you. “What?” You gasped before you looked down and saw Ben thrust up into your pussy, the motion making you see stars. 
</p>
<p>
  “Oh fuck…” You whined, his hands coming up to rest on your hips as you began to ride him swiftly. The prayer had started to slip your mind until you felt a hand slap you across the face, making you look up and see Kylo standing over you. He was holding his massive cock in his hand, waiting for you.
</p>
<p>
  “I can’t do both…” You said but Kylo just grabbed a fistful of your hair and literally forced you to take his cock. He hit the back of your throat and made you gag, your eyes watering before he pulled you back.
</p>
<p>
  “<i> <b>You better hurry up, baby girl. It looks like Ben is about to make you ~scream~...</b></i>” Kylo grinned, slapping his dick against your face. He was right though. Ben was hitting every fucking sweet spot that you had and with it being Ben and not Kylo...you really had to get through this.
</p>
<p>
  “Give us this day our daily breadddd…” You slipped up on the last part, licking the side of Kylo’s dick as your mind grew darker and darker with lust. It was becoming harder to care about saving Ben when his cock was so deep in your cunt.
</p>
<p>
  <b>
    <b>“Princess you feel so good, god you feel so fucking good. Please cum on my cock, please…” Ben shuddered underneath you, meeting your thrusts with his own. </b>
  </b>
</p>
<p>
  “And forgive us our, fuck, trespasses!” You whined, your tits bouncing harshly while you took Kylo back into your mouth. You couldn’t deny the pride you felt when Kylo cursed and urged you forward, your cunt clenching at the sound of his rumbles.
</p>
<p>
  “As we forgive,” You said before the scene changed again and you were now lying on Kylo’s chest with Ben leaning over you. When you felt Kylo press against the ring of your ass you slammed your hands down behind you, groaning as he slowly pushed in. 
</p>
<p>
The pain was nothing compared to the pleasure, feeling his hand move your hair to the side to whisper into your ear. “<i> <b>Are you gonna be a good girl for us? Spend the rest of eternity fucking the two of us?</b></i>” He bit down on the tip of your ear, enjoying your moans as Ben also slipped into you. “<i> <b>You’ll be so good for us baby girl, I know you will. All you have to do is let go…</b></i>”
</p>
<p>
  You shook your head stubbornly until Ben bent down and sucked on your tit, starting a savage pace that was going to leave you bruised. Kylo also started thrusting at the same time, the two of them working their cocks in and out of you so hard that you couldn’t even remember your own name.
</p>
<p>
 “Shhhhhhiittttt….” You wailed, the two men smushing you to where you could nothing but lie there and take it. The pressure began building once more and you felt Ben’s hand drop down and rub vicious circles on your clit. “Oh my god, you guys feel so <i>fucking</i> good inside of me.”
</p>
<p>
 “Of course we do.”
</p>
<p>
 “<i> <b>We were made for you.</b></i>”
</p>
<p>
  You began to cry as the pressure got to be too much, the prayer not even playing in your mind as you felt their cocks swell inside you. They were going to cum, they were going to cum inside you and you wanted it so fucking bad.
  
</p>
<p>
  “I can feel you tightening around me, Y/N. Are you gonna cum, princess? You gonna cum on our cocks like a good girl?” Ben growled, kissing down your neck and sucking on your collarbone. 
</p>
<p>
 You missed Kylo and Ben locking eyes as you nodded, too lost in the grips of pleasure to think about anything else. Ben picked up his speed on your clit while Kylo whispered all his dirty promises. It was becoming too much, too fast.
</p>
<p>
  “<i> <b>Cum. Cum. CUM!</b></i>” Kylo roared.
</p>
<p>
  “Cum for me princess, join me.” Ben cooed.
</p>
<p>
  Your cunt clenched and you felt your soul leave your body as your orgasm wracked your frame, your hands shaking and mouth dropping open as you cried out both of their names. They continued to fuck you through it though, chasing their own releases.
</p>
<p>
  The grunts and moans of the two men almost made you deaf until you felt the hot, sticky cum coating your insides. It was almost burning through you and the thought of it inside you had you cumming again, your body going limp from exhaustion as they both stayed inside of you. 
</p>
<p>
 You felt Kylo moved and you begrudgingly opened your eyes, seeing just the outline of him and his sharp teeth as he bared them at you. It was the last thing you saw before you passed out in their arms.
</p>
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